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Oct 2017
Most days i feel worthless
Some days i feel like life aint worth it
I cant help feeling like its time to quit
I cant help being labeled as a misfit.

Some nights i sit alone wondering what people think,
Only to feel bothered when it makes me shrink.
All the time feeling like a lost cause,
Because most i can see in me is all flaws.

I wonder what life would be if it werent such a tradgedy,
But i guess this is the thing we all call reality.
All people see in me is total abnormality,
All these things are making me lose my vitality.

I cant help but to feel sorry to be ungrateful,
but its hard when everything is so painful.
Cant you see these things are what make people hateful?
But all i can do is keep my smile faithful.

These days its so hard to keep my inner peace,
Because inside my mind lives a giant beast.
Please be careful for what you say,
Because today could be my last day.

All i want in this world is love and tranquility,
But making people want to be around me is not an ability.
My mind is slowly losing its mobility,
I cant help that i lack versatility.
Will anybody miss me?

Please help me save me from my own thoughts,
I dont want to end up between tied knots.
What people dont see is depression is a disease,
How i wish i could put my mind at ease.

I wish people can understand what it means to feel ill,
Mentally sick to decrease your living will,
To wish people loved you on a daily basis,
No more faking smiles on your faces.

All people want in this world is to be heard,
But these days everyone thinks your opinion is quite absurd,
To seek help is a cry for attention,
I just wish people understand the word comprehension.
So many people only care about themselves have i mentioned?

The only purpose of this is to bring back love for each other,
Everyone is metaphorically a sister and a brother,
Dont leave someones feelings left to smother.
Why this is all difficult i wonder.

To feel like every situation is a setup,
To talk to someone i need a mental build up,
I just dont understand the way people think,
I just cant keep the people i trust in sync.

Everybody has their ups and downs,
But i feel like mine always has the most frowns.
Until i cant take it no more and i start a meltdown,
I cant sit still when people are around.

I never knew what it meant to believe in me,
Nothing in this world is ever free,
even if wanting to be loved is not meant to be.
I always feel like i owe everyone an apology.

Every choice i make is the wrong one,
Im getting to the point where i say im done,
What my head deserves is a handgun.
John Nickerson
Written by
John Nickerson  17/M/Ohio
(17/M/Ohio)   
  447
   Hailey and Nico Julleza
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