I find myself not only wondering [but] Thirsting, needing to know when and how they died, [but] Thoughts or suffering or not: in short, The state before and during…
I observe a skin that’s wrinkling, Drying out and shrinking, Hear and spy a bird in tree, See the freshness, spring’s new growth, The only thing I really see is death, a passing.
I allow myself my breaths, The moods, desires - All that goes along, Forgetting for the most part.
Deep down I see the buds of parting And an emptiness because I have no answers. All that I can do is wait and act and meditate As if life equaled all time-in-the-world.
Every year in spring I find I’m writing, Charting age unconsciously, Literally marking time.
Not sad, not glad but emptier Than years before, (or maybe more). Noticing, acknowledging a substance; The substantial underlying all the grandeur.
Sitting Outside A Day In May 5.21.2016 Birth, Death & In Between II; Arlene Corwin
Underlying awareness, outward gladness! How can that be?