Typical male banter of which you think you are exempt-  but you are not.

Like the chick on the couch who plays the dumb blond, you are part of the culture.

Like an unnoticed concussion, you stain our brains with blackened thoughts of ideal bodies and insecurities.

You reek of stale laughter and wasted physique as you try to preserve your **** strap membership card with failing qualifications.

Since your hot wives have stretch marks and wrinkles around their forced smiles you play your fantasy league ; padding your stats with disingenuous gestures of matrimony.

With a stiff spine, we humor your talents the way your mother did- her icy tailbone under Friday night lights and forgiving disposition for missed curfews.
  
You draw from those years like a cactus in the rainforest.
  - soft soil - lacking roots and obviously out of place.

From above- you are an anomaly among the vines, masking your Cialis induced shaft by standing among real wood.

I hope you get cut down soon, all of you - turned into something better - like paper or a changing table for the sons we will raise to be disqualified from your clubs.