Within a dream I call to electric eyes
do my bidding, my voice is a sweet honey,
and his milk toned skin shudders,
because everyone thought it was
he who was bad news,
but I was the darkness all along.

I used to dream of protection.
of someone swooping in
and saving me from them, from the bruises, from myself and the scars.

I never thought anyone would actually show up.

I like to think I'm strong on my own,
but the power the galaxies within your eyes hold over me
scares me
and I crave to defy it,
but at what cost?

I reject all control,
in my fearful bout of defiance,
but it injures all good I have built between us.

and I fear telling you that I see the deepest
depths of the wounds
you might bare,
but I've been unaware
for so long
that I've no clue where they've come from.

I might be reserved and thoughtful,
but the monster in my chest
shouts cries of rebellion.
too good for too long.

as if the flashbacks
weren't enough,
fear of control over me
has me back peddling.

I just want
to be sane.

I just want
to be good enough
for you.