am i a failure ?
indecisiveness is the blood that runs in my veins
not good enough is a label on my brain
in between clouds on a plane ,
yet i feel crushed beneath the surface of the earth
and i try not to feel too much or think too much
but like an invisible ghost my own brain haunts me
i try to close my eyes and drift away like the aircraft I'm in
but my thoughts pull me harshly down like gravity
I'm now a crashing airplane
sending down flames and pain , I'm crying
my tears are the ocean i crash into
and my soul is the island nearby
watching myself crash and not being able to do anything about it
silent and lost in its own forest , my soul watched me from afar
my screams , my sirens begging for it to help
I'm falling into the water in slow motion yet everything seems to happen so fast
thinking if i would ever float to the surface
I'm still drowning , in my own tears and blood
slowly i lose my ability to breathe
but my beating heart is not stopping
i hit the ocean floor , a loud thud that  created a crater
now sand is surrounding me
i open my eyes but i can't see , the giant ocean and world in front of me
on the ocean floor helplessly laying
no hope no dreams no goals just a blank space of feelings
thoughts scream into my head and i mute them dead
i wake up on a shore ready to fly again
where will life take me after all this hurt and misery
will i drown in the salty water of my eyes
or explode on a town full of people
will i fall and be the fault of the peoples' pain
or will i safely reach land
my engines ignite , i regain back my sight
its time to see the world with my own eyes
its the time to live not trying to survive