What does it mean to love yourself, when you left things off on the wrong foot? Stumbling over myself, I couldn't catch the words back in time, they had already slipped out. Now I'm tongue tied and my mind keeps jumping to what you might think of me. It's not my place to say, hell it's not really even my place to care... but I do anyway. Because I WANT you. The sight of your stature sends my blood coursing, the sound of your voice summoning a smile upon my face. Your being invokes these things inside of me, the truth of our meeting reflecting in the stars. I think of you every morning, the image bringing light to my soul like the sun you were born into. To bask in your rays and melt the ice encasing my heart, I'm reaching out, but I'm so cold. And I'm so scared. This place has been my home, my sanctuary, built to protect me from a world so ready to prey upon my underbelly. How do I know you're any different? And then my mind races from desire, to fear, to fear of the desire, because I know where this is all headed... it's nothing that you even did, nothing you could even help, your taste is just too sweet. Your beauty is intoxicating, putting me in a state of animal instinct. I try to stay unattached, lest I forget who I am, swirling in the madness your image whirls me in. To understand that my fear of losing your company exists, and to be aware that this force is self fulfilling is ******* twisting upon itself inside of me, and I just need some reassurance, because I'm ******* insecure, but that's intimacy I can't just ask you for... especially when I couldn't even bring myself to kiss you goodbye.