It's Friday
It's pay day
It's time to go get me
Another AR-15
So I can go shoot the breeze
You can't tell me that it's wrong
The 2nd amendment has been around way too long
For you to croon your gun control song

Don't matter what you've got to say
When I've got the NRA on my side
Supporting MY life
But don't worry
If anything, you should be proud
Because the NRA says
No Regulations Allowed!

I don't get why you're so upset
I studied gun safety once
Eight years back
So I got your girl Teresa's back
No, like, I literally just shot her in the back
There's blood everywhere!
Don't scream, I'm telling you because I care

Oh, don't look at me like t h a t
Accidents happen all the time
I'm perfectly capable of handling this gun
You're just out to take me rights
And steal my fun!

Uhm, but forreal could you watch your tone?
I know you care about Teresa
But what about how I feel?
My masculinity isn't set to "criticism permitted" mode
It's on "gun control prohibited" mode
Say anymore and I'll have to go

I'm not gonna lie, the second amendment makes me come alive
Even as other people continue to die
I guess you could say I'm a real guy's guy

Anyways, just because Teresa got hurt
That doesn't mean that gun control would work
Why don't you just consult the CDC
You'll see, they'll side with me
And, no, it's not a funding thing
It's a freedom thing
If anything, you should be proud
Don't be shy, come along now
Support the NRA
No Regulations Allowed!