I've seen you there amongst the lavender fields when you thought no one was watching. Memories that dance a longing daydream, weaving strings of lilac through my veins. I knew you would plague me, but my eyes supped upon you. Supped and supped again until lavished by an allure a thousand French patisseries could never usurp. Your taste inspired madness - a craze you too endured. We turned over pages and bewildered them with Eden's of ivy that flourished within our skulls. If Van Gogh were a writer he'd write like us. A fable of seraphic beauty and lucid insanity, knotted together with existential philosophy. "Being and Nothingness" (Sartre understood) but we were 50 years too late to the Café de Flore. Those were memories of yesteryear, sealed with the rosy hue of antiquity I was always fond of. I can almost lick that scent of lavender that clings to the photographs, but I fear my tongue may bleed. So I admire them on a mantelpiece in a dust-soaked room where all that I love (and have loved) may live. I know that room not by daylight, for I dare not be seen to enter. Only the high rise moon knows that those footprints belong to me.