there are so many beautiful things in the world. I sometimes wonder if maybe it matters. like when I see the rain collecting into puddles on the sidewalk and children splashing around in them, or the sun when it shines through my window on a Sunday to wake me up. or the stars when you're deep in the country, miles away from the neon signs & pavement. or the sound of leaves cracking when you step on them in the fall. the way people's faces look when they're laughing, it's always different. the little crinkles & laugh lines. beautiful. they're all beautiful things. so spectacular that they hurt me, like you do. I can't love you, because just as the sun comes out, the rain disappears, no more puddles, and i also watch it set outside the same window. and the stars go away, or I'm reminded that the light we are seeing from them is so old, that those very stars are gone & you start to question what is real. the leaves & the people. what are they worth? we love to hear them both break. and I know you can't help but find satisfaction in the sound of my heart breaking as you step on it.