All I can say is I'm sorry

That horrific day was so long ago,
yet feels like yesterday when your
tongue speaks it's name.
I replay and replay
over and over
A never ending road that I'm forced to travel
as if there is a gun to my head
and a man that says "walk".

Then there's a wave
that crashes down on me
engulfing me in it's embrace.
Dragging me under as I struggle to breathe
I'm scared
Just as soon as I reach the surface
and gasp for a breath
the riptide pulls me under again
And I return to the submerging dark sea
that does nothing
but haunt me.