Baby,
You remain the love of my life, and I'll never stop loving you. As cliché as it sounds, l mean every word l say. We have come a long way, we’ve embraced major changes together and you have to admit being in a long distance at a very young age we have done such a great job. We make a perfect team Paul, seeing and living life with you has been a blessing. You have taught me so much, you’ve been every step of the way from my high school days encouraging me and urging me on even when everyone else including myself gave up on me, you still held my hand. It's always hard to tell someone your dark sides, and bare out all your insecurities, vulnerabilities and still be accepted for what and who you are. You taught me how to appreciate the simple things in life but enjoying those simple things with you made life PERFECT for me. You made me feel whole, complete, blessed and your love led me to the road of happiness. Everyday, every moment, every single second, just the thought of you makes my world go around with euphoric revolution. I know I was not the best girlfriend in the past couple of years but l was still in the process of finding myself, learning how to open up and be free with you, with us. All I wanted was to finally come home so we can be us, with no more walls built between us, no more distance, I wanted you to finally see me for me, when I can finally wake up next beside you and enjoy those simple things in life like sharing a meal, a laugh, holding hands………
   Paul I have really tried but l don’t think I can hold on any longer, you are barely there for me and that breaks my heart even more than the thought of you gone. The past six months has been arguments that should not even exist. All I asked for was a minute or two of your time but it feels like I am asking for too much. I understand you are busy but its just overwhelming to see you online or to see you respond to other people yet I am tossed aside to wait. I could be wrong for I am not there to see your schedule but then again I know this is not right by the impact it weighs on me, by the amount of hurt l feel. I feel invisible in your world, I have to ask you to call me and most of time you always forget, I have to schedule a Skype date with you, you wont message me until I initiate a conversation and you are not even proud enough to show the world that we are together. You can call another woman beautiful publicly but you cannot do that when it comes to me, it might not seem like a big deal to you but it is for me and your actions make me feel invisible, makes me feel like I am clingy, like I am begging you to be with me yet love is supposed to be mutual.
      The important things that made us Glokari do not exist anymore and it hurts me so much that l am the only one who feels major affected by this. There was a point you would do anything to hear my voice, you were eager to kiss me goodmorning and night, we loved sharing the jokes, the laughter even after a rough day and when the going got tough we would cry together and figure out how to move on together but now l feel like I am the stressing factor. You don’t even want to look at me twice after a long day it is like l add more stress to you yet l just want to be here for you. Talk to me and make me understand that is all l ask but everything turns into a fight. Paul I have over 50 screenshots of you giving me an explanation, either your phone died, your friend did this, the message wasn’t delivered, you were held up etc. as much as I am understanding baby l honestly feel left out, I feel like I am tossed aside. I can’t tell which one hurts more, the fact that I think someone else is taking my place or the fact that I blame myself because l feel like I broke us up in 2011 and l destroyed that Glokari connection. Either way Paul l want you to know, all I want is your happiness, I want to see you smiling all throughout your lifetime whether it is with me or with someone else. You are a wonderful man and even though our love story is distorted right now one thing remains so true Baby... I love you. Take care of yourself.