I am free
Free to think and dream of endless possibilities,
Free to laugh like it’s the first and dance like it’s the last
Free to define my life with my own hands, to see the world with new eyes - my eyes.

~ a poem : part 3

We are living in a "it's someone else's problem" culture these days.
Just how can we escape?

scars on scars on scars
they build up over time
thick and tender
so dark
they poison me
my heart feels full of hurt
and empty at once
filling my brain with words
of anger
and hate
and meanness
lies and lies and lies
echoing over and over
as i try to move forward
a reminder of all of the
****** things i've done
and the ****** person i've been
and how many different ways
i've been the source of hurt
don't forgive me
i don't forgive myself
i will live with these scars
let them continue to build up
until they choke me

The shadow of death
Hangs
Over every head

Even water
Left alone
Will disappear

Life is struggle
Survival
Unguaranteed

The spirit
Defines
All

All

Words sometimes flow
Like currents
In a stream

At other times
They resist
They resist

And I crumble
Under the weight
Of my pen

Life is struggle
Yet I
In my ignorance
Do not know
Where this road
Will end

So I advance
Just a little further
With faith
My lone companion

Though all seems unchanging
Perhaps mysterious fortune, awaits
Perhaps

I seek courage
To lead a strange
And magnificent existence

To work to alleviate
A poverty of the soul
To enrich the intangible
With decorous trinkets
Of creative gold

I take it in
To let it go
Except that which
I hold dear

Though pallid sickness arises
From the pit of my stomach
And time in this dimension
Only fades
The memory of this experience
Though fleeting
Reminds me
Life is truly mystic

To live long
One has to make something
Out of nothing
To create
Where there was nought

This page, this very page
Once empty
Now besmattered with thoughts
Weaves its own thread
Of inner life

And so
Another day
Is complete

And new life
Begins

killing field
inundated with
so many bodies
so much heat and pain
make me forget
everything i have witnessed

MODERN DAY, DISTANT DREAMS
this atrocious war of insanity that rages within, the shrouded beast of dysfunctional desires that dictate and debilitate , the 24 hour transitional trance of commerce and commodity, modern day with its distant dreams
An unstoppable brute force , ruler of the skies, hearts full of love and lies, visions of hell exchanged during the first coffee of the day, modern day, its distant dreams, and battery bred headless chickens
The marketing of mayhem and prohibition of ambition, an intrinsic and intimate introvert the individual, ridiculed and ostracized for its apparent need to be that bit different,  modern day modern thoughts the future of distant dreams is but a story of hope with an ever-changing finale
****** the pariahs, the instigators of our world fires, their expectancy high their losses low, nothing new just new machinery, new symbolic scenery to cast a rope over , tie tight , clasp hands and jump, careful not to make a mess as this modern day will find a way to profit, find a way to proportion the blame,
The new world order, you cannot cross our border, not with your attitude, your inconsistent way of life, bow down to our regime, to our points of view, the theme park rides run every 20 mins, get in line get on your carriage and get busy with conformity and ignorance as these modern days run so far from the tracks of your distant dreams, no more than incapable, inert, and shuffled along into others unquestionable and unscrupulous schemes,
JANUARY 29.   2016.