Every morning I just have to see your face
When am rushing, you do more than just slow my pace
Middle of the night you caressing me
I love that at times you let me be
we sacrificed a lot, nothing's given free
You're the bravery that makes all my fears flee
My baby,my gentle breeze
Your smile brings my hot heart to a cold freeze
You loved me though I never was a saint
My ****** soul only you could taint
A lifeless canvas that only you can paint
They look and see but you hold me and I feel invisible
A world where we don't find each other feels impossible
It was a crushing weight
It was a worrying sight
You never spoke you just held my arm
You never spoke just made sure I came close to no harm
Troubling times, you just kept mind calm
Rainy days, with you am at the beach resting under palms
You lift my spirits when my soul drops
Encourage me when my plans flop
With you is when my pain stops

I don't do it because I want to
I do it because my culture demands it
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because if I don't my family and friends look at me funny
I don't do it because I want to
I do it for the fans
I don't do it because I want to
I do for the money and fame
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because that's the game and I'm just a player
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because that's how it has always been done
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because I don't want to be an outcast
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because deep down am afraid I'll be shunned
I don't do it because I want to
I do because I lack the will to change what I've become
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because we somehow decided collectively this is how it should be done
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because it seems better to part of the flock rather than the black sheep
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because they told me to never deviate from the plan
I don't do it because I want to
I do it because I was raised to never question

Lazima uchoose, dooh ama doze
Lazima uchoose, respect alarm ama uisnooze
Lazima uchoose, ujitume ama ulose
Lazima uchoose, ujibuild au *****

Izi ndo vitu hamtaki kuambiwa, izi ndo the truth
Mnataka niseme life ni smooth but Leo siwasooth
Sherehe Sheria ndio inamaliza mayouth
Ukilewa vuguru, Hadi hunaga matooth


Daily unadial pedi ukidai Mali
Jipende buda na for sure utafika mbali
Imagine ukiwa diani ukiorder wali
Si lazima buy iyo jumu expe ati ju ni Kali

Picha ya Kenyatta Kwa walanje ndo unafaa kusaka
Jipe goals Ka Sancho, salah au saka
Mulla mob, nine lives Ka paka
Usijitreat Ka trash we si takataka

But anyway maisha ni yako
Chaguo ni lako
Ntaachia apo ju naskia mtu Kwa mlango
Am sure ni peng Fulani utoka pango

Sites to behold
A time to be bold
Tales to be told
Mysteries to unfold
Calm and composed
Secret and undisclosed
Triumphant and unopposed
Unpretentious , truth overdosed
Broke away from the stranglehold
Blessings sevenfold
Beautiful moments foretold
Brass turns to gold

Jesus once said love others as you love yourself
What happens when you don't even love yourself ?

I dug myself into a hole
I am now just a fraction of the whole
Everything slipping out of my control
Am a red alert if you're on danger patrol

I didn't see the signs
Should have quit the lines
As salty and bitter like brine
Aware it's my last supper but still I dine
Say it's sublime but nothing is fine
Need victory but defeat is mine
If I'm to forget, I'll need more than wine
Can't face this, it's as hard as swallowing a pine
Hate this moment like a moslem despises a swine

the country was laden with corpses, carcasses and calamity
the streets were full of strife and suffering
hearts were burdened, backs were heavy with baggage
all hopes dead, all heads bowed down, all starry dreams denied,
every step treacherous, every eye ever tearful, every lip trembled
energy drained, envy reigned
demons and devils danced, demeaning and devoid of delight

How did I get here?
Was this always my pre-ordained destination?
I find myself amongst strangers
In common ,the angst in all our minds is major
I can see desparation and longing on their faces
Does the inherent need for company and companion bring us all together to such places?
We may all manage to bury our grief
But the efforts at suppression turn out to be brief
How did I get here?
This is the question I need desperately answered
Thoughts of days gone by ravaging my mind like a cancer
Some do it to remember ,others to forget
Eventually all end up upset
A temporary moment of false calm and consolation
These are the perks and privileges of self medication

I let myself be bare
Open and exposed naked as the day I was born
All could see me yet I couldn't see myself
An open book all could read but none understood
One moment elation the next not in the mood
There cold and confused I stood
Staring at their faces
Some were seemingly sad some artificially happy some In-between but none content
All aloof and alone not one could connect
All dreading closing time for there was no one to go home to
Some in complete terror not even a home to go to
I have to admit that at times I felt scared too
I felt no glimmers of hope I saw no glimpses of light
Too weak to put up a fight

I like where this going
Feeling sky high like flying in a boeing
Love for who i am, no room to judge
**** the loneliness, it's a purge
This girl I love she be my queen
Make it be better than its ever been
My lifeline in this endless ocean, a raft
Naturally gifted at giving joy, maybe her craft
Mind-blowing like the monalisa, everypart of her be pure art
Eternally attracted to each and every part

love is effortless, a leaf floating on the mild wind
love is the remedy, loneliness a deadly disease and you're the cure
love is water, in its absence you'd die of thirst
love is selfless, for you I would bleed
love is blind, it overlooks misteps and misdeeds
love is king, you're the ruler of my heart
love is light, a single smile and the darkness disappears
love is the universe, it's infinite
love is a hero, it rescues from deep despair
love is alien, out of this world
love is addictive, you're the drug that I fiend
love is music, it heals the soul
love is like a child, innocent and true
love is gravity, pulls you close each time you feel like flying away
love is a mystery, holmes couldn't solve it even if he tried

Call to the heavens ,pastor
Do not slow down ,faster
Supernatural force, ghost, casper
worldwide calamity, disaster
*******, *******
Opposite of slave, master
Small but reach my full potential, mustard
Read the news, caster
Italian food, pasta
Whip my hair back and forth, rasta
Keep it all clean, duster
He gathers all his courage, muster

You heal my pain
With you I never feign
You consume me like a fire
Hold my hand and I would never tire
Whisper in my ear
And dispell all my foolish fears
Stitch up my countless tears
Wipe away my salty tears

Halt,  you can't proceed with no salt
Nobody's perfect, everybody got fault
Try to reach perfection and you find it's locked up in a vault
You can't proceed with no salt
You don't try too hard you just make mistakes by default
If you knew the real god is in you and is you, would you still kneel and exalt

My skin itches like bites from fleas
Can't be me, every time I find me I flee
I try too much to please
God please
I know the truth frees
And cold make everything freeze
God please
I want to own all that I currently lease
I hope it's frictionless like grease
Can I have it all or is it all just an elaborate tease

When people engage you , they expect you to act a certain way or do certain things, these expectations are drawn from past experiences you've shared together, when you try to deviate from their expectations they convince you that that's just who you are, maybe they don't want to be wrong or maybe they don't believe that you have the ability to change, maybe they want to stay the same and reject any change happening around them, anyway the past defines the present but it doesn't define the future
**** anyone who tells you anything different

Consider this
You bring me peace
You give me undiluted feelings of bliss
Your love is soft and warm like a woollen fleece
Consider this
I yearn for your kiss
I give you my whole heart and not just a piece
When i hold you i feel nothing is amiss

You are a goddess
You had me the moment we met, I confess
And it's not just because of all the heavenly features you possess
I'd say you're out of my league if I had to guess
Never thought you'd show up when I gave you my address
You alleviate my stress with each second we caress
You're my refuge every time am in distress

I can see through you
I can see through your lies
Most importantly, I can see through your half truths and false promises
I can see through your flattering words and your false charm
I can see that I have been stupid to believe a word you said
I can see now that it was all just an elaborate facade
I can see you were just a foe carefully disguised as a friend
I can see it was all air and vapour masquerading as tangible matter
I can see that it was all theatre , a fool I was to think it was factual
I can see that I thought I could see but in reality I was blind
I can see that it was just a well crafted illusion
I can see that all you brought me was confusion
I can see that I was subject to your unprompted rejection
I can see that you were never willing to alleviate my dejection
I can see that I would never be part of your selection

My head is clear , you helped me make all the toxic thoughts retreat
I was at the lowest point but still you asked me to smile and your impact was I remained intact
I shed off that ever clinging pain and self loathe
You opened my eyes to finally see my worth
You made me feel good , you were and still are my soul food
When I only hoped for a raft you became my boat
Please accept this thank you note

I've waited for your love like parched ground waits for rain
Only your kisses can quench these thirsty lips
I've longed for your love like a weary soldier longs for his home
Your smile made my dying heart joyous, and its once again brimming with life
I live for you like a pirate lives for gold and for the sea
You are my oasis in this vast desert that is life

I express my love in unsent letters
Promising to give shelter, everytime you come across unfriendly weather
Am right there with you when you're lost in the storm, feeling fearful and light as a feather
I just want to know whether, there's a chance that one day our hearts will be tethered
When am restless and moving too fast you're my pacesetter
Am sinful,maybe even soulless but everyday you make me better

once one but we split into multiple parts, divide
two bodies moving in opposite directions, diverge
hoped you'd give me all that you have
I gave you all that I had
sadly you gave me less than half
i've never been your fave
all I ever wanted to do was love
and make love to you like a perv
you calmed me down when the world got on my nerves

You light up my days like a lantern
I've noticed am happy each time am with you, it's a pattern
And with each moment my heart grows fonder
Each time I hope time slows down and we're here longer
My heart is overwhelmed with joy like a young bird when it learns to fly
I can't love you perfectly but I promise I'll try
You're my poison
It's like you got me under some love potion
I want to be with you till the day I ride in a hearse
I want to hold your hand and carry your purse

hiding my eyes so you cant see my soul
am searching for something to make  me whole
i try to be strong but sometimes the weight takes its toll
the nights be cold and dark as coal

my heart is bound in iron clutches
all the broken fragments held together by patches
i try to offload the pain but like a tick onto me it latches
feels like hours but just ten seconds have passed on my watches

Notes from my days in hell
pray to God I make it out alive and well
Raise up my hands and kneel
Hope these wounds eventually heal
Maybe I'll finally be able to feel
Lying on my bed completely still
Am constantly hurt, wish I was strong like the man of steel
Wish I was free from all these pills
Even my smallest fears give me chills
When am sleeping I dream of love and unimaginable thrills
I was selfish, for my own happiness I was willing to ****
Want to get to a place where I can forgive myself of all my ills
Conquer every valley, mountain and hill

the moment I held your tender hands I felt a new kind of love
i always hoped this day would come
now that's it's here I hope to never let you down

i look at your innocent clueless eyes and I well up with tears
you've already found a place in my heart
a warm yellow halo floats above your head

A bed poem
Something I write as it pours outside
Something I write as I think of what it's like to not be alone
Wishing you were by my side

A bed poem
Something i write when the night is quiet
Something I write as I stare into the photograph
Longing for the good old days, my mind drowning in nolstagia

A bed poem
Something I write as I try to guess what I'll dream about
Something I write when in my heart something is lacking
Don't know how I got here, I must've been lucky

A bed poem
Something I write because you only call occasionally
Something I write because poetry is a good mode of expression
And am not ready to open up to anyone

After you left my blood turned to mercury and I was too heavy to move
After you left they did an x-ray and the doctor said my heart looked rattled up
After you left tiny waterfalls appeared right under my eyes
After you left my favourite song sounded like the screams of a siren
After you left my mind went blank and words turned to symbols with no meaning
After you left sadness ruled the night and sorrow seized the day

Your love is the reverse forbidden fruit
The more bites I take, the harder it gets to leave eden

Late at night and am bored
Headphones on ,am tryna drown my idle mind in music
Am smiling thinking how good the day was
The lyrics start to sink deep
On most days I just want to fall asleep
My thoughts start to trip
Sometimes I feel majestic, like mighty waves rocking a ship
On occasion am unsure and afraid
wolves set loose upon sheep
it's clear the music ain't working
Guess it's back to counting sheep

The music of our love has been muted
The bright colors of our promises have faded away
The calm winds of our kisses turned to dry desert sandstorms
The warm gentle rays of our laughter turned to scorching heat waves

Soft kitten purrs have become screeching screams
Once sinless souls now sinking to the darkest depths of damnation
Daydreams demolished and in their place are dungeons
Serpents slithering in the once stainless snow

Sandwiched between my blankets
I can hear the low rumble of thunder outside
The skies are darker than usual
Dim light is coming through my window

Am half drunk, half bored
Am half naked but not cold
Am half way through this new love song I just discovered
Am lost in my thoughts tryna stay optimistic, that glass half full mentality

I should get out of this place soon
Its the tenth time am having this thought in the last ten minutes
Can't keep it off my mind
Cant leave even if I use all my might

Chained down by all the good memories
Slowed down by that beautiful girl who promised she'd kiss me
Tryna take my first step but am paralysed
Tryna be brave but am terrified

Am alive, i dug my way out of that grave
its in moments like these that i know i need to be brave
Although i'll never be the same again
i know the struggle wasn't in vain
I've probably never been more afraid
searching for answers, i kneeled and prayed
When i was young i thought lightning was just god taking pictures of the beautiful moments down below
so maybe he's watching over me, i never give in even if i face a thousand blows

There's no one like you around
I still can't get you
Same difference
Red is for danger
Green is good, good to go
Am color blind, same difference
He's got too much to see
And he's hopelessly blind
I wanna say same difference
He's selfish and we were made in his image
He never answers when I pray
Same difference
She can't samba
I have two left feet
Same difference
Call it euthanasia
And I have no reason to live
Same difference

Love is like when a base meets an acid
The deterioration is quite rapid
Love is crazy, a majestic hound gone rabid
Your arrow finally hit me, nice shot cupid

Am scared to die so I wear a face mask
Can't help but think of all the questions I never asked
I can't breathe like am stuck in a vacuum flask
Thank God for this liquid aged in casks

Am standing where the roads meet
Am hoping the road ahead is longer than what's behind me
Or maybe am just not long for this world
Feels like time is against me
Am it's opponent
My time is running out
That's the reason I can't sleep at night
Coz every remaining minute I want to spend with you
Every second I want to see your face
And maybe memorize every single feature
Treasure every imperfection
Coz baby am not long for this world
I try but ultimately I fail
I tremble every time we touch
And am hypnotized every time we kiss
Am brave but in this moment am afraid I might lose you
My eyes will never see you again

I was drunk when I wrote this
So don't judge me when you read this
You probably didn't notice
But when it comes to love am a novice
Am no Casanova
Am not the kind of boy girls drool over
You loved me all the same
My restless heart only you could tame

Am jumping off a cliff and hoping that before I hit the ground I'll learn to fly
Am avoiding airports, I love planes but I just hate saying goodbye
Am trying to stay awake, I love sleep but I fear the nightmares
Am hoping the sun won't come up because the light will expose all my flaws
Am wearing all the newest clothes but inside am hollow and plastic like a mannequin
Am trying to bring back that smile and sunshine I had before it turned sour
Am working to be the angel I once was before I fell from glory

If love is a drug, is it possible to overdose?
Fill the cup till it overflows
Fill the river till it breaks the banks

It started with a spark but every time you kiss me, you feed the flame
If I lose myself tonight you're to blame

Broken bones and fractures
Bent crumbling structures
Crawling hellish monsters
Hungry circling vultures
He never foresaw this rupture

The blood in his veins becomes venomous
Vehemently vicious and villainous
Vivid visions of violent vivisections
Vincent is extremely livid
Once virtuous as a ******
Once vainglorious but now just vestigial
Everything vast turns vaporous

If God was a poet he'd write about his feelings
About how for the longest time he felt lonely
All alone in the fabric of time and space
Nobody to share his days with

If God was a poet he'd write about his immortality
About how he's destined to never die
For him that day is never coming
To him maybe it feels like a curse

If God was a poet he'd write about death
About all the carcasses and corpses
He won't do a thing about it
He understands that part of the journey is the end

If God was a poet he'd write about love
How two random strangers come to be inseparable
One feeling he/she cant be without the other
But the purest love he'd say comes from a mother

All our gods are deaf and mute
They can't hear our prayers or maybe they do but choose not to answer
All my friends are strangers
Just people I pass time with but never really open up to
All my senses are numb
Addicted to social media, forget about thin white lines
All my bones are brittle
I will run to you even if I break each and every one
All boys are the same
But you'd be surprised the lengths she'd go to, to impress a **** who doesn't deserve her
All control is just an illusion
So maybe just let go and go with the flow
All my best days are ahead
One day I will die but each day before that I will live

You said to yourself that you were done for
All the while tears welled up in your eyes
But you must not give in
You must not give up
The world owes you happiness after all you've been through
You must live ,so as to one day claim it
And I promise that day will feel like heaven, eternal rest
Your reward for all those storms and tests

I want a heart that can't be shot down
I want endless laughter that can't be drowned
I want to be all smiles no frowns
I want my days to be colorful like the graffiti I see downtown

I want you to kiss my lips
I want to dream of you when I sleep
I want you to know I'll always be here am for keeps
I want you for every season even in autumn when trees shed their leaves

I want a picnic under that cool tree shade
I want those memories that never fade
I want to be the one that stayed
I want you to know you're the most beautiful soul god ever made

I want that love that warms me down to my core