Melancholy in my coffee
Subdues my day
Dresses me in drab
Lifeless clothing
The smile I wore yesterday
Left hanging in the closet
Slightly wrinkled
Sends me out the door
Under the grey sky
My vision clouded
My mind numbed
Even your warm skin
I kiss goodbye
Can't make the sun shine today
Tomorrow, I think, I'll take
My coffee black

My touch can start brush fires.
My fingers are ***** matchsticks,
the kind your mother warned about.

My petaled lips spark against yours
like flint against steel.

My volatile breath, an overcast of smoke
creeping from the belly of my throat.

My twisted tongue douses your chalky skin
with fuel, a gasoline spreading to your logged limbs.

I leave your organs to curdle,
and by morning glow,
you’re nothing but a burn victim.

i kept my hatches battened but that
didn't stop your love from barreling toward me
like a runaway freight train with faulty breaks.
and god almighty, did we crash.
you came to a screeching halt at my doorstep
and i didn't know what else to do but let you in.
you looked so cold. we did not start with a spark but a full-on fire.
i told myself i wouldn't fall, instead i jumped.
our sinking frames somehow morphed into life preservers,
and we managed to keep each other's heads above the waves.
we had seemingly saved one another.
you tossed your pills, i flushed my razors, and for a while that was enough.
but we learned the hard way that even the deepest love
can only keep the storm clouds in your mind at bay for so long.
eventually our cracks began to show.
missed calls and silent hours built houses of cards
that were blown down by too many miles.
we hardly ever smiled anymore.
my hands were sieves and yours were sand.
i want to break the hands of the clock
that cursed us with this bad timing.
i have mourned all the hours i won't ever have with you.
i have felt the thunder that rumbles in my lungs
when i reminisce about the memories we'll never make.
the moment i realized i would never wake up beside you
an atom bomb went off in the center of my chest.
but the radiation is what's killing me.
the life is being drained from me here in the wake,
in the ache of your absence. but i won't beg.
i will live out the remainder of my days
tormented by wondering if maybe in another world
our love is perfect and neither of us bleed.

- m.f.

When I find a place that invites me in like I'm a long lost relative,
I would do anything for them
and that's a weakness because when I let myself be pushed around,
these strangers I call family
will treat me exactly like how my family did.

Here is where I find myself conflicted
running away just to find another home that ended up to be
the exact home I barely got out of;
like escaping from a lion's mouth straight into a crocodile's.

Why am I always fooled by gold-painted stones
why do I always fall right into the wrong book
I've come across these type of characters so many times
why stay and taint their existence that even they wouldn't claim.

I try to fix the broken but my hands did anything but
and left inked-fingerprints on shattered glass
it's only about time until they discover whose it is-
I hope maybe I'll be gone by then.

I try to pull away from the hook that's been tied to my spine
realising it too late that it's slowly ruining me
reeling me back to a home I desperately want to get rid of
but I know these ghosts won't find peace if I keep falling back to them
and that's the curse of leaving a mark.

Eventually, I think I'll become just
A pair of eyes. I won't judge and
I can't speak, all the words I might
Have used are being erased. This
Simple act of seeing and remaining
Mute, may dictate I be
Permanently so.

If you need
some change
in your life,
I have a jar
of pennies
at home.
I was saving up
for a ticket
outta here,
but maybe we could
go together?

morning is the sun flooding through my window
night is when you're flooding through my door
like an unforgiving force
I would gladly drown in
you are the storm of all my secrets
you are not regretted
but are the embodiment of my regret
pounding on the walls
begging to be freed and known by all the next lovers hands to touch me
you are the drivel that pours out of my crevices and imprisons the glare of every stranger
I wear you on my skin like a blanket
you are my comfort and you are crushing me
you are my reflection and the light that leaves spots in my vision
you are the moments in between every wound I inflict upon myself
you are every inch of despised color dripping down my thigh
I break promises like you break hearts
but we both can't seem to stop
so wash me down with my despair
and we can pretend this is the last time we have to empty out our pockets before one other