Dad, where did you go?
I hate that you're dead,
I'm angry you're dead,
I wish I could go and rest

In that coffin buried deep,
I wish to travel to your grave,
To dig into the Earth,
Open your coffin and

Crawl inside to sleep,
Beside you again, so cozy,
I wish to pretend we're,
Together on the sofa

Giggling and laughing,
A feeling fleeting so fast,
I wish to grasp,
Onto the only image

Of your corpse once alive again,
That would talk and hold,
The burden of your Death with me,
To  hold me, my daddy,

I wish to open your coffin,
Lay inside and pretend again,
And again and again,
You and I forever best friends.

I contemplated opening up,
To you or to anyone,
To bear my soul,
For anyone to understand me,
See me! See me!
Understand my condition,
My damage,
The ever twirling mist that surrounds my vision,
Hear me! Hear me!
All I hear is their whine, their cry,

The beckoning howl of those hounds.

I fall into that Hell,
With bright fire and burning,
I feel comfortable there,
That heat---my skin covered in sweat,
You there too,
Dancing with me in lust and love,
In that Hell,
You and I.

I sit inside the small laundry room,
I close the door,
I imagine this small room,
Is my coffin,
I watch as the dryer turns
           and turns,
                            and turns,
Maddening that noise,
That spin,
Didn't think I'd be back here again.

I watch the spin,
I frown,
Is there any way out?
Or should I put my head in?
Turn on that washer,
And drown.

Those soft waves rushing up to the shore,
They rock back and forth,
That mighty ocean carries so much depth,
I start to lose my breath,
Too calm that sea,
Opposite the storm inside of me,
I take one more breath,
Delicate.

I sit inside my head,
Alone
Alone
Alone again,
No one to comfort,
No one to care,
No one to hold me,
Or play with my hair,
No one to listen,
No one to see,
That there is a darkness eating away at me.

I want to fill the bath tub up,


And fall asleep in it.