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Melanie Beth Apr 2017
Somewhere beyond --
that first complete, naked, honest truth
we shared in the moonlight
and the eventual half-truths full of
holes of omission
in the years that followed --
is the place we are in now.

You could be suffering
Clinging to life
Wasting away ever so slowly
and I would never know;
because the truth hurts, or so you say
when you say nothing at all.
We sit in silence.

You have become so absorbed
So obsessed
with protecting me,
my innocence, my love
that the version of you
you want me to see is too perfect;
he's not the man I fell in love with.

Where are your flaws,
your insecurities, your doubts,
your struggles with yourself
and the world? I miss seeing them
in the moonlight as we drive
purposefully nowhere.
You can trust my love with your life.

Marriage is more than a title,
more than late night talk shows on TV
with Chinese takeout on the couch.
It is a lifelong commitment,
a promise to be each other's
first line of defense against the world
and a place to call home.

Marriage is reliving those very first
complete, naked, honest truths
and marveling at the fact that
we are still here.
It is a continuation of that
raw, selfless vulnerability
and a promise never to run.

Marriage is a covenant of love
a love that keeps no record of wrongs
no matter how few or frequent.
A love that trusts, hopes, and endures
because this Earth
was never where we were meant to be.
I love you.
Melanie Beth May 2015
I know you love me
I can see it in the way you smile
   When I tell you I'm happy and content
I can feel it in the way you hold me
   Nuzzling the neck of your little spoon
I can hear it in your carefree laugh
   When I tell a joke no one else finds funny
I can smell it on your breath
   When I kiss you and inhale pheromones
I can taste it on your tongue
   Melting your sweet words over my heart

So why won't you come home?
The words "I need you"
   Have completely lost their meaning
And nothing I do tonight
   Could ever change your mind
I'm writhing in the pain of your absence
   But you think my pain is unbecoming
I know you think there's always tomorrow
   But baby what about tonight?
The words "come home"
   Fall on deaf ears
Melanie Beth Mar 2015
I love you
And I want to hurt you
and make you sit on your bed with your head in your hands,
pushing on your eyeballs
trying to hold the tears in.
I want to make you anxious
and make you check your phone every ten minutes
And I want you to feel a sinking
in your heart and stomach
each time you do.
I want to frustrate you
to the point where you can't sit down
and instead must pace back and forth or drive in circles
Because **** it there must be
some way out of this.
I want to build you up
and tear you down by your innocent and fragile heartstrings,
dragging you carelessly behind me
but holding on so tightly
Because I love you.
Melanie Beth Jan 2015
You can do no wrong.
You could walk on water
if you tried.
Sometimes I forget
how perfect you are,
but I needn't worry
because if I point out
one single flaw,
you will be sure
to put me in my place
and tell me
just how wrong I am.
Melanie Beth Jul 2014
I have lost all inspiration
to write about those silly little feelings
that dance across my lips
when you kiss me,
because, baby,
I just don't feel them anymore.

I have lost all motivation
to clean up after myself
and to impress you with my beauty,
because, baby,
I know you'll love me either way.

But I have not lost all hope
that someday, somehow,
we'll find
everything we've lost.
Melanie Beth Jul 2014
You need not say a word
To draw a tear
My heart does that for me

You need not strike me
To make me bleed
My heart does that for me

You need not abuse me
To inflict pain
My heart does that for me
Melanie Beth Mar 2014
Sparkling wine.
The bubbles tickle my throat
and I giggle.
I'm not much for wine
but this stuff
is different
Unlike you...
I wish you were different.
I wish you would keep caring
unlike all the others
that just
But I guess I have to give you
some credit.
You kept caring
far longer than most.
You held my hair back when I puked.
You drove 500 miles to see me
on more than one occasion.
You brought me flowers
on important days
and ordinary days.
You kissed me when I cried.
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