Finally, I have found Where the Sidewalk Ends!
Well, less "Where" more "What" and "When".  
The sidewalk is our timeline and each fixed point is an end!

Around our aura parts the currents of space and chaotic life.
Where we've both been trapt in its waters and we gained our years of fight.
Battling towards each individual branch, we see emanates of sounds and lights!
With laughs, cries, and hues galore we parade our guiding lanterns high!
For in the distance is curdled screams of wedding bells and flashing purple skies.

All this time bobbing in the waters, but it taken so long see
At each Sidewalks End, the darkness recedes and reveals pieces of you and me.  
Where a lantern collects a moment in time, each dew drop holds our melody
Each star holds pieces of a fragile heart, and every End is only The Beginning.

Drowning in the air I can no longer sense buzzing and swirling around me in melodies and soft caresses.
That would spring my steps and twists my fingers into beautiful worlds of colour and chaos.
Now, it just blows inconveniently and loud around everything that surrounds me.
I have become anchored in this underwhelming realm of ****
No longer can I see past the flesh around me; the hazy shadows leaving sneak peaks to the souls they carry
Or feel the ancient spirits of the trees with milennia of knowledge and wisdom slumbering soundly.
Nor hear the Goddess sing in the crisp, quiet caress that came with the fallen snow.
No.
My life has become controlled by this...this small atrocity that absorbs all my colours and leave me dulled and gray
I'm calm and clear; but so calm I am empty.
There is no music in this new mind of mine
And my magick feels locked away
Is this normal?
Who would darken such a sunny day?
I say as I swallow the pills anyway.

For the first time
In too many years
I look to a mirror
And what should I see
But a beautiful and loved woman
With a smile in her eyes and a gasp on her lips.
After so many years of uncertainty
I finally recognize the reflection

How will I ever be a mom
When my baby maker is as broken
As this dark heart?
What an unfair world

Shaking and sobbing
Silent and still.
At rest? There is no rest.
I've lost the will;
It's pouring from the hole in my chest.
I await:
Your laugh
That look
The pages of a new book.
Please!
Just take me away from this mess.
Is it me?
Or the by product of this love for you?
Ugh, ******* emotions.
If I'd just flip the switch, I could be free.
But is this a curse or am I blessed with this ability?
Blessed.
What a crock of ****.
I am a blessed mess without the ability to love less.
Because you taught me to love with all or nothing
And we are not a family of nothing.
So, we give it all.
And we fall fall fall
Down the rabbit hole,
Slamming to an abrupt stop,
Stumbling in search of the ones that fell with us.
So search I will; day after day and year after year; until my smile can replace the storm of tears
For now, I am shaking and sobbing
Silent and still
At rest, with no rest
Until I find the will

I see sunshine in your eyes
And moonlight in your smile.
My effervescent star;
My rainbow child.

Eagerly, I await that flutter in your chest
Or your head laid gently to my full breast.
With lullabies and whispers, we'll lay you to bed
And a kiss upon your small, curly head.

For I have sunshine in my eyes
And moonlight in my smile.
With you, come new life;
My darling, rainbow child❤