He opened doors to both Heaven and hell
but contradicting conflict is preferable to the purgatory of false confidence.

I numbed my soul with constructions and sudden reality is jarring.
Nobody likes being cut cold turkey
but the way he wipes my tears and touches his lips to mine makes the withdrawal infinitely better than intoxicating fantasies of escape.

                          *-lf-

You took
my grief
my heartache
my sorrows
my despair
my mourning
my broken heart
and burned it
until it was all
ashes
and You took the
crown of thorns that
i wore and
placed on my head
a crown of beauty.

So there's a tie and its tied tightly tonight but i'll try tirelessly to untighten the tie for tomorrow.

"Do you know how many times you've disappointed me?"

Well, in fact, I do
I do so meticulously note them down

The paper - my flesh
The pen - a razor
The incidents - my blood
The reminders - my scars

So don't you ever worry,
Because, yes, I do know how many times I have disappointed you

Would you like to see them?

You cut your foot on the floor of the laundry room,
We dressed your wound in kisses.
You pointed to a path that led to wildflowers and tall grass
And shattered beer bottles like stained glass littering the ground,
It was overgrown
Like his hair in the summer.
Something about cruise control and two left feet,
And second hand smoke from the passenger seat
And drowning the butterflies in our stomachs with seltzer water,
Because it burns like gasoline.
I'm sorry I'm not everything my first impression made me out to be.
I am a flower growing through the crack in the sidewalk but not as beautiful as the roses he got me.
Holding secrets deep like salt in wounds,
Or caskets filled with forever sleep,
Because I didn't want to hurt you and you didn't want to hurt me.