It's too late now, the damage is done.
A deal has been won,
My heart for your soul.

I don't miss you.
I miss being held really tight.
I don't miss you,
I miss having someone to sleep beside at night.

I don't miss you,
I miss being kissed sweetly.
I miss hearing someone say they love me.
I miss laughing together,
I miss arguing about who was funnier.
I miss being myself with someone else,
I miss having someone who knew me so well.
But I don't miss you.

I don't miss being ignored,
I don't miss wondering if I was truly yours,
I don't miss finding naked pictures of other girls,
I don't miss you acting so bored.
I don't miss your hurtful words,
I don't miss the broken oaths you swore.
I don't miss you.

I miss your deep blue eyes though,
They were so calming.
I miss you giving me the fluffier pillow,
A small gesture, but it wasn't wasted on me.
I miss your kisses on my forehead and nose.
I miss your laugh, your smile,
I cherished those.
I missed you singing to me,
Such a terrible voice- I found it so comforting.
I miss the hands that held mine,
I miss how our bodies intertwined,
I miss seeing the love in your eyes.
Maybe I do…

No. I can't miss you.
You don't miss me.
Being hung up on you would make me vulnerable, weak.
Something I can't allow myself to be.
That's how boys like you hurt girls like me.
I don't miss you, really
I miss who I thought you were,
not who you turned out to be.

I know he'll never make me happy.
He'll never make me laugh until I can't breathe.
He'll never get past the walls I've built up to protect a heart that's been broken already.
I'll never truly love him.

But that's okay; tolerable.
Because he'll also never hurt me.
He'll never make me happy but I don't care.
As long as he never makes me miserable.

I wrote you a letter,
and then another letter,
and another, and another,
until I wrote you a word.

So I wrote you a word,
and then another word,
and another, and another,
until I wrote you a sentence.

So I wrote you a sentence,
and then another sentence,
and another, and another,
until I wrote you a letter.

I hope it finds you as I found you.

Yours truly,
Yours, truly.

Can I have a word, please?
It can be any word.
Just give me a word.

We can all share the rest.
Just let me have one.
It can be anything.
I'd take canteen or avid.
I'd even settle for timely.

But you can't use my word,
whatever it is,
without asking.
Because it's my word.

And I'll almost always let you use it when you ask.
Unless, for example, my word is wonderful
and you want to use it to describe a movie I haven't seen yet
or a movie I saw already and didn't care for.

I really want everything.
That's my first choice.
Flabbergasted is a close second.

What more can you even take?
******* for making me feel like a mistake.
I would still give you everything-
If you just wouldn't take all of it away.
I wish I didn't still care so much about you.

Maybe, maybe you don't love me,
But you could still care?
You no longer want me,
But when I'm hurt you could still be there.
No. That's silly.
I'm sorry, I know you don't love me,
And I shouldn't love you.

You couldn't have hurt me so much when I was hopeless-
When I had nothing to lose.
******* for showing me what it was to feel bliss,
And then to feel worthless and used.
I hate that even now I need you.

You made me happy, you made me pathetic.
******* for hurting me,
Just know you'll regret it.
Because you always do.
It's a cycle, I know you.
What's most messed up is I want you to come back again-
Want to give you another chance.

I remember when you held my broken pieces in those cold hands of yours,
Let's try again and maybe the pain will stop before my heart does.
My fleeting uncaring weak dear love.
No. Not mine.
But I'm yours.
Forever yours,