So… you never promised me forever
and yet your moans had eternity written
all over them
I remember the day you said you had
fallen in love with me
and still feel that heat against my skin
Where I entered once with free will
is the same place you exited because of fear
Are you living a lie there too?
All I know, is the taste of your cigarette
lingers still on my lips with fulfilled memory
and the essence of your scent impregnates my soul
You’ll find me back where it started
where I was lying in daisy’s
with the sun shining on the dew of my skin
Daydreaming, manifesting a world with you~
They say that after the dust settles that everything will be
alright, that in time you’ll become centered and whole again.
The sun and moon still will rise, as too the stars will wait for
your wishes cast upon the night sky.
The warmth of just being will sooth the inner unrest, allowing
you to just breathe…unfold.
Yet, even though the natural flow of life still exists, what
if the pain doesn’t cease? You see, it’s not confined to a traditional
box of thought. It’s a definition of a time when one flesh bound
human being dared to share themselves with another.
Soul imprints…together sharing intimacy, trust, honor with endless
amounts of joy and laughter.
So yes, the dust can settle and time passes us by…life goes on
and here I am, not wanting to cross that line with anyone again.
Void and its silent echoes stop the need for another flesh bound spirit,
gone is the tenderness, the touch.
Friends shield me from dreaming of these things…keeping me safe.
Existence; that’s my world now…embracing my own rise and fall.
All this time has given me is you…with me writing our names in the
sentiment of the dust that fell~
Often as adults we question everything where children care blindly without remorse .
The jaded no longer control the meek and we all find our own way somewhere in between.
Nobody has the answers , just a few are far more gifted at selling lies as answers .
We are strangers locked within the same tomb.
Castaways from are truths so we covered ourselves from their lies .
Lost within and somehow standing beside others we have little hope for.
Do we settle for the comfort or embrace the truth to understand all with little to show .
So close even the rejection can be sensed without a word spoken between.
Manipulation with dirty fingernails and dry tears cease to effect the outer shell anymore.
Numb and faded by the games that are played finding that hiding is the best we can do.
Fear of; the unknown rapes my senses to the point of slamming all doors while painting lamb's blood across the entry.
Hence casting away all menacing shadows of past demons.
This isn't a life, but in being spent, broken, and abused I simply can't afford more than hiding.
Stepping back in time
while embracing the spirits
of times long cast to the wind
our hearts open and senses
become alive; hyper aware
Moving in slow motion
feeling the strength of the shield
in place, chills move through me;
I look at you and see the same
breath ceases for a moment
Walking across the threshold
of ancient ruins the inhale takes place
causing my thoughts to swim inside
eons of yesteryear's while arms of
old hold me up; embracing all that once was
It was there that I saw a part of you for
the first time
a part that was whole with bold edgings;
someone strong within themselves
while combining flesh and spirit
That moment was reminded of our own
history, our past walks together on this earth
and it was when that I knew I loved
you from this lifetime and all others;
a solid form of truth in a world of lies
Finding the foundation in ruins~
Wishing they didn't exist
yet they do
dangerous undertows stirring
Lashing out with venom
to make a point
showing that I too matter
Reality then hits saying
“if you did matter you wouldn't
Sarcasm falls on deaf ears
raging the internal blow
festering in the untruth of it all
Voice says...”I want her to know
it all...to see every picture”...
then again ~(Silence)
Wavering between this voice
who will win...
Heart speaks up and says “No-one”.
I just want to be nice, and sweet again...minus
From the shadows I'm allowed to see
if only for a moment
confusion sets in; pulling my corpse
from the coffin
...wonder, frustration ensue
Was it to remind me of what was
or that you are still there loving me?
Could be that you hate me?
How am I to know
you are the one that let us go
There is this shell of a woman
moving forward in time
grasping onto moments
just not anyone's heart
...my love is not my own
Torture me more if you must
or look up the definition of love
and apply as necessary
just know...for now and forever
Come out of the shadows
...tell me how you feel~