Short but deep it isn't that hard to reach,
neither it is easy to reach.

You kept me awake all by myself but you occupied my mind.

My mind is a bin
A very large bin
Filled with a huge amount of junks
And it doesn't even need to wear a trunk
It is exposed to the gobbledygook

Be a lovely flower
A flower than shines even in the pouring rain

Be a lovely flower
A flower that blooms and blossom
Into a beauty of pure heart

I love him
I love his still small voice
I love how he gently whisper to me
I love the way he shows his love to me
I love because he loved me

Made by lust
Together like dust
Never will last

I think I do
Love myself so much
Almost to an obsession

I wonder
If you've ever loved me in any ways...

I don't think I am feeling well, right now
I am about to throw out words right now

Our minds are confused by the light we see, the artificial light we thought it was right.

My thoughts are all scattered around like pages but in a book of torn hiatus pages profoundly thoughtless. Left on a bookshelf trifling and collecting dust.

Not a single idea of life left, contemplating.

I dare not speak of my undesirable heart
Pushed by a radio button
Flooded with radio waves
Electricfiying my disinterest and the sums of ambivalent

Is too early to measure my heart's desire
I shall not speak.

Do you think I can apply
Sleeping less is more?

Sleep less
Yawn more
Stay awake even more

Take naps
Hate sleeps
Stay awake ever more

Need rest
Take breaks
Stay awake forever more

Sleep less
Wake up early
Have a little rant, every morning

Sleep less
Travel far
Have an abundant of rants from travelling long..

Sleep less
Coffee and tea, maybe a little more

\
I've lost my friend, and I've lost what it means to be a friend
I am out of touch, to this people world and what it takes to have a friend

A friend, what does that mean?

There is nothing it could mean to me
Since the day, I've found strangers along with feelings and thoughts
Strangers they come and strangers they leave
Love and hate they bring, hate and love they leave

And what does that mean to have a friend?

\\
There is no friend, not in this world with people
What we take are words and words they slip
Faces we see, shallow as it can be
Forever, as it may last
The last i count, a day or two
We keep secrets and secrets are words
Tales we hear, comedy we laugh
And what is left, are words that have slip

And sleep, our attention span we forgot what have been

\\\
Lively strangers forever we be
How happy this could be
Flaws we see like diamonds it should be
And in this people world, we all leave words in people's ears

Once this is written
It will be gone

Every other things
All on earth
Be gone

Tell me, what should I do
To the things be gone

What then should I touch?
As they all vanished, when I touched

Nothing to hold, nothing belong

A l    
             B       e
                                G

                                        o
                                            n

                                               ....

Go pass the phase of a good taste
Go pass the haze and you'll see taste
In a while, even if it takes a while

Bridge the gap
Instead of letting the haze
Stink the taste

Keep tasting it bit by bit and
Never forget how it taste
Right in the haze
In a while, the taste will be clear

Refine and savouring

Backpack a bed; for a full rainbow in a head, can only be seen while taking a plane.

Clear water; in the pool, deep and shallow.
Right in-between, there is you.
Feel the rapid movement of the waves surrounding you, moving you, captivating every part of you.

Every move you make, surrounded by moving waves, sway away, and let it seize you as it takes you to another open wave.

Surrounded by endless waves, forever in a clear water pool.

You can't go anywhere else in this world

You need to be a dreamer who walks in reality

To know that dreaming alone

Won't walk you in reality

What you need is to

Walk your dream along

And falls in eternity, to know that going around

In life, is nothing about easy or difficult

Its about the process of every minimal details

Remember the suffering you will face

And remember the strength

You will be given to face the suffering

Who knows, you will be able to experience

Blessings in suffering

And find your joy in the process of living

And finally it is to realize "life is about knowing what to suffer for"

Also, dreamers don't stop dreaming, reality is about doing

Do what you dream and dream what you do
This is reality

I learnt about the four letters word

The fast in time
The hope in pain
The past of love

And most of all faith will last

Life is quick
A time race
A chase for ace

Don’t panic
Don’t turn away
Not go away

Think,
Solve

shouldn’t be looking at your soul
right open in the depths of my eyes
lights shone between us
creating path to meet
from where we are

we are not destined
but you open your
eyes wide
looking for connection
right where the light leads
in this path

(off this light and end this sight)

There is one moon
On this earth
Which I look at
Most of my night

Since I was a little girl

It always seems so beautiful
And mysterious

Something to be discovered
Whenever I look at it

Always seems unreachable
Even when it came to stay so near

Close to my heart
As I reach out to discover
The darkness wrap me
And I lost sigh of where
The moon was last at

I stayed up every night
Looking at constellation of stars
But I see no moon

And it dishearten me
As it seems I have slipped away
S
    l
       o
          w
               l
                  y

Without meeting the moon
which I've seen since I was a girl

There's a sharp object in my heart
And its not coming out
Damaging my brain as it hurts
Physically

Mentally *******
Making me wonder
How did I survive
Till these days
To discover such mishap

And how it is possible to
Have come this far
Not knowing
Such suicide object
Could have been placed inside my heart

Probably have slit
Causing great
Internal bleeding

Causing blood clog
And all sorts
To this damage, hurting with uneasy

How will I survive?

It looks like a lonely walk
As the trees at the side walk
Slowly wither
Right when you walk passes it
One by one
They wither
And it never grew back
Even after months
Of rain and sunshine

Nothing happen to the trees
But a lonely man walking pass
It many times

We are only
living by
Coming by
Never realize

We are only
Dying by
From this world's pollution
Killing us
By time

Consuming by..

Uncertain is my only certain
Let me be
There are no other way
As no one knows
Even our next second

342am and I am hungry in the dark
I will run to the kitchen
Like It was flying jumping
And ripped of any food I can find
Like vampires in twilight
Hunting for fresh blood to drink
To satisfy our hunger in the dusk

Only a desire I have is to open my fridge
To drink a cup of fresh milk
Like my hunger thirsting for something fresh

Like the vampires sensing
There is certainly
No such fresh object in the fridge
In the despared just like them
******* any passing blood
I look for little bites
To grab

Why am I not at rest

Going to bed
And
Needed to sleep
And
Not wanting to sleep
And
Suffering from can't fall asleep
And
Sleeping only when the sun rise
And
Deprived of sleep
Arises from one of those
sheep
Lost in the woods
Unable to sleep

Frustrations and Fears

It makes me feebler

It crawls into my head
like army of ants
crawling on my veins

It makes me shiver

Frustrations and Fears

Screaming in my head
Crumpled thoughts all inside my head

Unfolding, unfolding it out again
Making it straight, straightening the thoughts

Frustrations and Fears

I'm letting it out, making it loud
Just to see if there's any illustration that could work out

Frustrations and Fears

As i see it collide
As they meet once again
Tremendous fire

Objectively you'll feel
Thru your body
Warmth up

It will burn out
Make it work out

And soon it makes me
Feel its burning passion

To the undying
Frustrations and Fears
Overflowing

*Frustrations and Fears
It breaks your bone
Tears your flesh
And makes you feel
Right where you are
Trying to gasps thin air
for feeling it deep

I've dreamt about my dreams
Its a reality

It happens right where I am breathing
There's no where else I could be dreaming

And even if there are dreams that didn't last long
It was dreams that has been dreamed of

And it could be dreams I can be dreaming on

*It is a dream where dreams lives on

No one is to young to start
keeping their Soul alive
be kept living from a lie
It is endless and it leads to destruction

"Let the world keep you and lose your soul"

You choose, you are made to have a choice of your own, a freedom to choose.

He presses my heart
I couldn't breathe
As much

Irregular heartbeat
Suppressing pain
At my chest

I wonder if I'm going to die
At this rate of my breathing condition

Taking a few deeper breath
Hoping to take in some air

My breathing is still the same
My Irregular heartbeat
Suppressing pain
At my chest

It makes me hard to be
awake neither to stay asleep

In my sleep and when I'm awake
I could count my irregular heartbeat

I wonder when am I going to die
As I struggle in heartrending
Awake and neither asleep

I cried
But my face can't feel its tears

I screamed
But no one has heard its toll
Not even my ears

My mind is the greatest destruction
Leaving my body weak
My heart unable to feel what is conscious and clear

This happen when my soul tries to reach deeper into
The paradox mind

Its a strange experience
Every time when it happens

I was never told not to explore
But what else could stop me to this adventure

Where only strange things could happen
Only Human could answer and be the answer

It will disappear together with the strange hours
Passing

Pancakes and Maple Syrups
Sunshine and Light Blue Sky
White Clouds and Golden Hashbrown
A Round Sausage and Chilled Milo

Red, Chilli in my saucer
Red, they are in my eyes
Red, they are burning strong
Red, is my tongue and my taste bud
Loving it

Yellow is only when "you're loving it"

I wake up
I look up
I flip to the side
refuse to get out of my blanket

I tug it tightly and put my hands under
tilt my head and fall back asleep

another day like this could go by

I wake up
I look up
wonder what has gone by
breathing in empty air
breathing in what was left

what is life
that past gone by
we hold such a vivid memories
that gone by

I wake up
I look up
look to my left and right
room filled with non living things

what a shame
life is empty
without any heartbeats

I wake up
I look up
the white blank celling
reminded me of nothing

*The words and the breath
of life, come breathe in me again

Reading them
Over and over again

I wonder if you do the same

Going back to read the stories again
Visit the stories just to see if it change
Reading the sentences once and again

Reading them
Over and over again

I am not building
A relationship
A love

I am only doing it
Out for giving love

The love will keep
You from being cold

Keep you from
Where you are
And hopefully
It will kick you
To keep moving on

Because I am only
Giving love
I won't be here for long
I only happened to pass by
I don't know why
But one, I know it is for good
But it is not for good if we don't move on

My heart is beating up
to something strange
Something I cannot explain

But the chemical is strong
Is beating in my heart

I wish to tell you
What it is
but its strange and the chemical is strong

Pull it off
And stop the sound from getting into your ears

Leave the thoughts of what you see
Even when you close your eyes

Choose to lay it down
As you've already lied on your bed

Think about nothing but how tired
And you need to sleep

Don't you ever worry
Before you go to sleep

Just go to sleep
As how you would go to sleep

Because it's short and sweet
I am happy you can read

For a moment
It disperse
I thought
About something beautiful
That wouldn't last forever
I didn't even grasp it
And it be gone

How quick and suspended it felt

There is a shape
A certain patterns
We've constructed
A system we've decided
How we should follow
And do as it is repeated

It has come and form again
A flow required
As our nature perceived
This is a cycle like endless circle

Sometimes I question
Why must we build it to have it followed
Why can't it be disform and how we formed it
And why do we do it this way

And somehow that is the only way

You've open your mind
When you spoken those words

I've come to notice them
little nature of yours

It was some insight
from focusing those flickering lights

It has only been days
And it still stays the same
As my intuitive always says
"It is not a place where I should go
Not any deeper than this. As there is no light at the end of the room, where I peek thru the gaps on the cracked wall. It is not a safe place to go on, not many have been, not many survived, not many have stayed and been alive. It is not a place for anyone to be, for no one has ever been inside."

So I walked out and saw another open mind...

Too young and touching
Too old turn lusting

Too much for physical
Our brain has taught to function

Too much to see
What seems to be right it sees

But not the encourager
For too young and old
This is not the cycle

I'm thinking of making it cheery
Jovial in disguise
In one's high spirit
Like the lucky one
From her merriest heart

I stare into non-existence

Taking breaks from existence

Restoring my resistance

So to come back substantially fit

To feed my realism

We are equation

In degrees we calculate

In many we equalise

But in many we fatal

So we divide to keep it balance