I REALLY DO MISS OUR
         MISSING 51st    
state, now that its gone...
  I realize how beautiful
  the state of bliss really was!

when I was a clock
you were too slow
to keep
up with me
when I was a wheel
I was always around
but you always seemed content just to  watch me roll on by
when I was a cloud..
... white or gray
It  never seemed
to matter much ....to you
either way
when I was a question
you had no answers
when you had answers
I had no question
That when I was a nightmare
, You always remained a dream
When I was an open book
you made it easy
to always turn the page
and when I'd  fear
what I might find there
it seemed like you
would always skip ahead
making sure
my post is clear... making sure
that my ghosts weren't there !!

When I was a clock
you were too slow
to keep up with me
now that I'm an old man
I walk slower much slower now While  you could run so far ahead but, you're always there
holding my hand ....holding
my hand instead !

pay no heed to the frustrated
invalidated
potentially addlepated
irritating convoluted
not even amplituded
but hell bent on clogging up
Your emotions, your reactions
your common sense
and your precious time
It's just that
they are a little bit
easier to see
by over looking the mask
Behold we have reached the dawn
Of the... Subliminal mime!

If it is - as they say
then GOD slammed
a couple of doors - in my face
yesterday
It wasn't like I had not seen
that long haulway
set out before me
door after door...
...wide open - just as far
As I could see

So...maybe...just maybe
I was or chose to be
unaware...as they
began to slowly close

As I sailed along oblivious
to what was - not...
..to what I miss
and then...BLAM
so quick the second
that I never heard it slam
what with my momentum
roaring at full hum

I knew right then
that my...
just now ex-friend
had created a wound
believed to be one
that would never mend
which was...
at that juncture
very much right

Right....no!NO! wrong!
Right then
was that time to stop and think
About the depths
I was or was not
willing
to allow myself to sink!


" You Know," I said " Its Been In
Your Head...from the moment!"

That moment - months ago
when that bridge was crossed
Set ablaze - burned to a crisp
no way back
across the divide
me
on one side
looking back
Across that void
regretfully seeing
the uttered...not muttered
words that I had heard
and wishing right then
that that moment
had never occurred!

As two white men we be
talking about BLM
as suddenly one would decide,
to deride , not implied
but simply replied
"But it's not the right time!!!"

I sat there agape
repulsed...
as if hearing
fingernails scrape
across a chunk of slate
married to an indigenous
blessed with beautiful indigenous offspring
who carried that native appeal
grandchildren as well- wait....WAIT!!

I wanted to scream "Are you MAD- RRRrrr Uuuuuu InSANE?

With motors overheating
I loosed that string
let that hot-air balloon
rise up and steadily drift away
carrying off a friendship ( of sorts )
a favor in the act
where wise men stop
to think..instead of react!

into the wind I watched it sail
as I stepped gracefully
back from the rail
Stopping dead in my tracks

So...was I surprised
as I watched...
... those doors
SlaMMing shut
so abruptly
amid today's nevermores?
YES! ...sort of
I guess you might say
but I pulled up my anchor
set sail on calm waters
Jettisoning my rancor
starting with reasoning
seasoning
tamping down any hot embers
"Small fish of'n ave big tales!"
I read on a strangers porch
just today along my travails
My mind...
..suddenly remembers!

At first just a smallest of smiles
existed on my unwilling face
Before the laughter erupted
washing away all of it away...
...without leaving a trace!

   $mall price to be paying
that bridge so selfishly ignored
which turns out - as you knew
t'was not a payment...you willingly could afford!!

Then that breeze
blew over me..
...refreshingly cool/
replenishing me
more than I believed
was my right to be hopin'

A bestgone friend
a few hundred lost
so much was gained
than was to be lost
when all those windows did suddenly open!

That is today's truth...
...my reality lesson.

peace!!

I know not
why - we
collectively do
what- we
do not- or even
try to  understand

I know not
how- we
connect into
that which they
will not allow or endow
what we demand

I know not
when we
decided to
undo - not view
that knot
that was once
that strand

I  know not
where we
go from here
once we
don't get to imbue
Upon Our Land

I know not
who you
listen to
when naught
was said that engendered
to expand

even the smallest thought
or doubt - idea or regret
or what- might- be lost
by  those
who care not why...
... they just do !
Might that be you ?
Well...
... it's not me!

The life of a human
Is a short time span
So we do need to look quick
at all we can ..
at all the things
that ...
..might be missed
any of which
could be
something that
should  have ...
...been
on your list
and just might be
the thing
that could
have
gotten you
past ..
...that...
...which
you needed ...
... to ...
.........resist !! .