Have You ever loved someone
But knew they didn't care?
Have You ever felt like crying
But Knew you'd get no where?

Have you ever looked into their eyes
And said a little prayer?
Have you ever looked into their hearts
And wished that you were there?

Have you ever felt their heartbeat,
When the lights were turned down low?
Have you ever whispered "I love You"
But you'll never let me show?

Love is grand, yet it hurts so much.
The price you pay is high.
If I could choose between Love and Death,
I'd rather choose to die.

So do not fall in love, my friend,
It doesn't pay a dime.
It only causes broken hearts,
Yet it happens all the time.

So do not fall in love, my friend,
You'll hurt before it's through.
I ought to know, my friend -
I fell in love with you.

What is it with this fatal attraction
For my soul that’s what it is
I have tried hard to ignore it
And not always give in

Erase you from my heart and mind
To be free from you at last
But every time you’re near
I simply have no chance

What is it about you
Keeps me wanting more
Your eyes mesmerize me
And pull me into your world

Your body makes my pulse race
I undress you with my eyes
I wish it were just physical
I’d have walked away by now

I love the way your mind works
Even if I don’t always understand
You make me think about things
That I never have before

The way you make me smile
And the way you make me laugh
Is just another of your facets
That keeps me coming back

I love the way you accept me
Like it’s ok to be myself
I let my guard down around you
And I take off my many masks

You seem to understand me
Even with all my many quirks
You even seem to tolerate me
When I’m acting like a *****

There’s so much more about you
That I just can’t find the words
To tell all the reasons
That you're driving me  berserk

That’s why I keep staring at you
With such passion in my eyes
You're my fatal attraction
And that I can’t deny.

I don't hate you for not loving me anymore,
but I hate myself for still loving you.
I assure that every word in this,
Every single one, is true.
I love you so ******* much,
And I'm clinging on to hope,
But I'm starting to loose the will to live,
I've already tied my rope.
I probably won't do it,
I'll stop myself in the final seconds,
But death is constantly tempting,
"Come to me" he beckons,
I don't hate you for not loving me anymore,
But I hate myself, for everything I'm not,
Karma gave me all the bad luck,
I'm due some back, I guess she forgot.
I'm not the man I used to be,
I was improved by our passion,
I was smelted from our love,
Our happiness, and our compassion.
I will always be here,
Waiting for you to come back,
I'll be living my life, just not fully,
Because a reason is what I lack.
I used to have a reason, you,
But you're no longer there,
Just a scar on my heart,
Of which I'm proud to wear,
I don't hate you for not loving me anymore,
But I hate myself, for hating you,
I've somehow turned this pain into hate,
But this hate isn't real, just an attempt to pull through.
I will never hate you, I have nothing but love for you,
But this love is killing me, its tearing me apart,
Let me show you how to fall in love again,
Let me take you back to the start?

I hate this place,
For I can't seem to leave,
Wherever I roam,
I'm in this place of grief.
Its paths seem to go on forever,
An infinate corridor of hell,
This place is a curse, a wicked spell,
And into it I fell.

I hate this place,
Even the doctors are confused,
They cant help me,
Or at least they refused.

This place isn't physical,
Yet it follows wherever I roam,
Its a mental state,
And it's my new home.

I no longer sleep,
I no longer feel,
I just exist,
In my loneliness...

The room spins with an awkward intensity
As I find myself (once again) questioning what is real
Fearing that time will steal another moment
From my consistently weakening grasp
Unknown forces pillage my thoughts
3:00 am
Ideas jump from my mind like suicide bombers
Burning and fizzling as they plummet to the ground
Confused by my feelings
And confused by the world
I ***** emotion onto a page
Hoping it will save me from being broken
But words cannot contain
The run away
Freight train
That is my soul
On fire and restless
Far too tired to sleep
Way too hungry to eat
Too thirsty to drink
Too everything to think
I mean what I say
But I can never say what I mean
So I stare a the T.V. screen
Hoping it will make me normal
Or at the very least numb

Goodnight Red Balloon

i often wonder
if i'll remember
in the morning,
how i cried with
passion battered
against my chest
like a child,
i can't cradle it
much longer

dust
turns red
through my eyes,
maybe if i dream
just a little longer
i'll smile longer too,
some days i get tired
throwing phrases
against my throat
hoping they'll
escape

i've always been
fascinated
by tear stains
the way they track
my mascara through
years of freckles,
i never knew i had
this many
until now

our bodies
lying hot
between the
concrete and
the sky, whisper
windows of silence
through flowers
wilting against
my skin, i knew
a destruction
you could feel
in the scrape
of my nails
on your back

and this dream,
it's no better
than the rest of them
i've always feared
forgetting
the most important
things, but this
is more important
than anything
i have ever known

this flash between
your teeth, i don't know
what forever is, what
it means against
the sunset, you spoke
these words and it
crushed me, my heart
is beating, but it's frail
the fight within its chambers
is slowly beating out to sea

the ocean never
called to me
like some girls,
i wanted to feel
the rain on my skin
without being pulled
into the undertow,
this breathing love
between our chests --

i don't know if it works
the way you wish it would
my words they tangle
into knots on the way
from my mouth into yours
and i never knew
your breathing the way
i wanted to, i've never seen
you breaking the way that
you saw me that night

your parted lips
pull
against my teeth,
and i wonder
why i always bite
instead of breathing,
why i hurt instead of
loving, why these lungs
don't fight for every breath,
they only fight when they're
close to dying out

i want to watch
you sleep, i hope you
take that the right way
i want to walk on an earth
where your arms can heal
and your mouth can cut
me open, i want to feel
more than i am feeling
i want to dance
for hours, i want to drink
and hear you laugh
in the dark of night
when nothing matters
except your eyes

your eyes,
they capture me
like butterflies
pinned to papers,
i wish i had wings
to beat against
your cheek, that way
i could tell you
everything
and i know
you'd understand

Dear heart

stop taking things so
seriously,

I have three fourths a
mind that likes how you're around and
a stuck twenty five bent on
shutting you down before
inside (and I'm trying) out loud with
count to two, one is familiar but
(water thinks) so are you after the
rain comes and white-washes us
clean

but white isn't neat, who says red isn't
true and the two next-best colors aren't
yellow and blue? It appears as though
wisdom (seen through a blank lens) is
only now starting to shift shades and
blend in the hues of the thoughts of the
heart's hidden song

to think some folks can't find
a place to belong!