The scary thing about dating is that you want something so badly,
Then when you get it you're confused.
See you want forever but the thought of forever freaks you out.

You can imagine being married, spending time together but mostly you wonder what happens when it's over.
You can't think of starting over without them, of forgetting them,
Of learning to be yourself again without filling your hours with them.

We imagine a relationship as a fairytale thing where you are together, understand each other.
The kind of love you find exactly when you need it and it wraps around you like a blanket and keeps you content.  
Instead the right person could come at the wrong time and we question whether they are the one.
You question if the timing really is the problem or if something is wrong with you for looking a gift horse in the mouth.

You want to talk for hours and not get bored but instead you feel self conscious,
Like maybe you're not that interesting.
You want to be all over each other but instead you fight about everything.
You think it will be ok but it gets worse and scares you.
You wonder if you are wrong for
each other.

He said he would love you and wanted to have a future with you. But you felt smothered like maybe he wanted someone available and not who you were.

Your fear magnifies into paranoia. What if it isn't enough? This love you thought would carry you through everything and suddenly its a void.
You need him and you wonder if he would understand if you told him.

And you begin to think that maybe its you who is messed up. You want too much too soon, you're too afraid to be happy.

Maybe it's time to let go of all that and let him love you. You can't plan falling in love.

Its a love that I never had
Its a love that I never feel
At first I want it so bad
I want you to be around
I want to feel your arm and love me
I want to feels your breath into my ears
I want to hug you straight into the daylight

But when I see it all
I change
I grow
I realize its not easy
Its not going to happen
All I want right now is 'life.'

(m.i)

To think about you, i wont
mouth your name in my sleep, i won't
wake up wishing you were here, i won't
forget you, i will


Dreams are a ***** though,
memories too.
Love songs are beautiful,
Tulips too.

However Tulips wither and die the moment they bloom
my tulip only grows,even after the bloom
in any and every weather fault
and in any disaster, it never falls

Summer
Spring
Winter,
and then back to fall

to think about you, I did
mouthed your name over and over in my sleep,I do
wake up wishing you were here,every night
forget you, I tried.

If a poet ever tells you
Writing is easy
Writing is fun
If they say this to you
They are lying
Lying a ton
Being a poet
Isn't easy
This is hell
But writers have a place
To call home
To dwell
Where they live comfortably
Is a dark place
A dark cave
And the only ones who enter
Those who love
Those who are brave
Poets are deep creatures
Endless thoughts
Endless pain
If one lets you see inside
Don't injure
Don't be vain
Just quietly sit there
As their soul
Takes you as part
And absorb what you can
As their words
Come from the heart