**** me
love me
crush me
hold me
hug me
its all lies and your surprised open up your eyes and see thats not me just one of your ****** up fantasies why you hate me I don't see the pain your feeling just watching it go by and you won't see me cry so **** me but i won't die don't you think I've tried stop speaking your lies tell me the truth for a the first time do you even love me like you say you do

I hate you because I hate myself

oh how i wish i could escape oh how i wish i could fly oh how i wish i would just die i wish i could just walk away from the pain that suffocates me daily i know i will never amount to anything at all but i am going to attempt to pick up the pieces from which I'm scattered to be honest  i will never be the same way i once was because I've been beaten broken and bruised these ******* girls i get so aggravated that my brain swirls i can't even remember the last time i actually felt loved by anybody at all i help everyone i can but no comes to pick me up when i fall what about me........

I'm dead....... inside some place i can hide it i don't even fight it if there was a god he would save me from this despair i can't compare my pain to the throbbing in my head all the voices screaming while the ***** is swirling through me making it hard to stand i look down at my blood covered hands and the ****** knife across the room i fall down and i feel so dead trying to stand back up was a mistake so much blood i couldn't take it i just lay and die no tears no crying just sit there like a man drinking the rest of the ***** in my blood covered hand anyone to save me now nope no jade my life starts to fade so dim as if some one turned off the lights i see the flash backs from all those restless nights I'm glad I'm dead no more pain no more misery no more fake people to claim they love me

i feel like Judas from the bible expect I'm the one who is always being betrayed the one who's be played god can't You ******* hear me pray or are you just looking the other way what the hell do you want me to say i don't give a **** if your offended I'm dead and I'm walking and talking stalking my prey say something if you have something to say don't ***** out be man and stand up for whats right don't just let them win the fight

i wish i could just cut out my tongue because I'm done talking I'm addicted to this pain i wish i didn't have a brain oh wait i don't so i guess its a little  better sike i need to stop falling for theses dikes getting into too many fights staying up too many nights turn off the lights and let me be unless you really love me but who would am i right so shut the **** up and lets fight I'm done trying to bite my tongue and keep quiet because when i do i explode like a bomb and everyday I'm ticking so look at me the wrong way and you will experience a dooms day i got nothing else to say unless you wanna see my dooms day