when someone asks me my talents
am i allowed to say them, even though i don't excel?
i sing good, but im not amazing
i play guitar, but i can't play certain chords
i play tennis well, but i still double fault a lot
im ok at writing, but im no poet
im a good person
but apparently not a great one

O supportive bully,
What shall I do to satisfy your hateful love today?

O friendly enemy, why must I hide who I am
like a coat of armor protecting me?

Your confident insecureness
breaks me every day

Your judgmental acceptance
makes me put on a mask
of thy who is not me

O safe toxicity, how do I escape thou?

the one that breaks you most
doesn't always have the scissors,
but the glue.

my friends come to me for advice,
come to me to vent, help with their problems.
but sometimes I feel like I'm the one who needs my advice most.

it's a teachers job to make sure their students are okay,
but the students never check on the teacher.

Why do I fall for so many people,
But no one falls for me?
Is it just me not being able to express it,
Or when you see me you want to take the express way?
Is it me talking a lot,
Or you talking to others about me?
And not positively.
I may get portrayed as the crazy one,
But all I want to get portrayed as is someone's love.
Why am I so different? Am I undeserving?
Its not specifics anymore.
Is it just me completely?
Because you all have just completely ignored me.

"Stop fishing for compliments"
It's the hungry who needs food most,
The poor who needs money most,
The unloved who needs love most.
It's the people who get the least,
that end up fishing.

I wish I could go back.
I wish I could go back and ask you why.
I wish I could go back and have one more conversation,
About why you just stopped.
Stopped.
Was I being myself too much?
Was I not pretty enough? Not popular?
Too loud?
Loud.
I used to be loud.
I used to enjoy talking to you.
You made me feel like I could open up.
Open.
I can't do that anymore.
I can't completely let my guard down,
In case they're like you.
You like hearing "like you," don't you?
Like being liked? I can tell.
I did too.
You took away my trust, but still;
I wish I could go back to you.