I want to be with you,
But if I'm investing
More than you can return,
I might just see you
Later on down the road.
The road will be paved
With specks of gold and marble,
Surrounded by belligerent birds.
Because my life will be
Beautiful and happy,
Even without you.
Because I have an inner beauty
That sprouts happiness abound,
And if you catch me around,
And tell me you've made a mistake,
Well, honey, you dug your own grave.
I'm not a woman
You find just anywhere.
I have the capacity to love
With not enough time to spare.
I'm not the type of girl
To hold grudges easily.
For years you held me close,
And for rocky times,
Much too far.
So if you see me down the road,
Hug me and say hello.
I'll hope the regret
That you didn't hold me
Like that years ago
Settles well.

You're pathetic
A cry baby
Never amounting to much
Worthless and useless
A waste of space
Obnoxiously selfish
Self-centered attention *****
You crave pity
And all eyes on you
Just stop whining
Long enough to **** yourself
You don't deserve life
Since you waste it
You're nothing special
Just an accident
Never meant to happen
Sincerely, yourself

Help me see beauty in the world
Put a smile on my face
Bring out the side of me I thought I'd never see again
Are everything I need
Have beauty inside and out
Shine brighter than the sun
Give me hope and joy
Burn in the back of my mind
Are my saving grace
Are my savior
I love you

You have seeped into my veins
An intravenous drip of affection
Conjured into this darkness and
Coursing through my bloodstream.

My valves twitch obediently;
There is nothing natural about this affair
Where you rest your tired head on
The wells of my body.
My collarbones greet you with great
Uncertainty

If the song birds sang
At night, if they rang
When the stars show their light,
Instead of sunlight,
If they sang at this, the hour of noon,
Or if they sang to the piercing moon,
Would it be the same?
Would birds have a new fame,
Like the owl, their calls eerie?
Instead of the chirps we know, cheery?
Would I feel this at ease
And attuned to peace,
Listening to their music,
Or would their majesty lose it?

Goodbye my friend
Could I even call you that
You did stand by me
But it's hard not to
You're not real
And I'm growing up
Watching you fade away
The tears in my eyes
Screaming for you to stay
Don't leave me
You're the only one I trust
But you're fading away
And there's nothing I can do
I'll miss you
I'll always love you
My imaginary friend

Quiet
Thinking about why I'm here
Listening as the world crumbles
Lonely
I've pushed everyone away
For reasons unknown to even me
Broken
Hurt by things I've seen
And past experiences
Scarred
By the blade I put to my skin
Marked by the words repeated in my head
Hopeless
I've given up on finding help
Nothing has worked and nothing will
Depressed
Not because I am sad
But because I feel there is no reason for my existence

You've read it all before
Said you'd be there
But when I quit
It's like you vanished
You'll probably read this
I don't care anymore
No one really sees it
What's right in your faces
The cries for help
And tears spilled
Every suicidal thought
That runs in my head
Maybe you think
It's just how I write
But I write my heart
And it's crying out
Has been for a long time
Just no one hears it
The silent sobbing
Hidden away from public
My heart cries out
Save me
Don't go
Just try
Please
Try to save me

I'm hidden in the lies
Cascading the mountains of truth
You so blindly try to climb
You can't seem to comprehend
I'm the master of death
The father of the gods
You ritualistically worship
I'm the truth in the lies
I'm the lies in the truth
I'm everything but what are you
A flea biting a dog
A dog in the sewers
A rotting corpse sailing on the sands of time
Lies hold my truth my existence
My way to say
I'm just a nothing