I know there's a lot of things I wish I didn't say
But please believe me I never meant it that way
There's not enough paper in this world
For me to write down how I feel
But to keep it short and sweet
All I ever wanted is for you to smile
And its taken me a while
To reach a point where I can except
That me and you were never meant to be
Only god himself could ever see
How much you really meant to me
but the decision your making
I hope you stick with it
Because you and him just seem fit

Every soul carries around
A small ember to witch it
Uses to ignite the fire inside our hearts
This ember enables us to roar
And it is what renders us human
But when that ember is doused
We become just a shell
We feel no fear no shame nor happiness or joy because when your
Soul burns out and the light in your
Eyes Become dull Try and find hope
It's what a soul is made of even though
It no longer roars it can still be re-lit all that's needed is a spark
so just keep my ember lit
And my roar will keep you warm

Lost and alone in this empty house
Trying to scream but the noise just
Won't come out I'm lying on the ground with the bitter
Taste of tears in my mouth the silence
Slowly destroying my soul
Only trying to reach out and find something new
But my hope is fading
And in death I think about trading
What I have left for one last vision of what I had just to make me smile
Just so I can think of you for a little while

When angels cry
The sins in us all
Are washed away by their tears
But there anger tears apart the sky
So when you hear the thunder roar
It isn't the atmosphere cracking
Under pressure
Its when the good are done wrong
And the bad should begin to feel fear
For their end is near

I remember when I
was young and in love
I remember thinking of
and wanting no one else
I always thought you'd always be the girl I loved forever  
I told you that one day I'd build my house and we would live together
And hear I sit in a throne I crafted to perfection sipping on the whiskey
That burned the most as it was a pain I come to love
I created my home in the way I described and my dream home came alive I guess you could say my dream came true the only problem is this house is empty and its memory's were meant to be filled with me and you
My thoughts are still the same
You're still the girl for me I just wish you were here so you could
See I kept my promise
That I would build a house just for you and me

Anger is a ugly emotion
But anger doesn't hurt
So when you look at me
And I giving you that ****** expression
You hate to see
Don't ask me what's up
Don't get annoyed when I tell you I'm fine
Because anger blocks my ability to talk
Just look at me and smile
And tell me I'll be okay
And hug me till tears fall down my face

In distant years I plan to build
A house for you and me
And for it to be a sanctuary
For the lost and those in need
Because people come and go
But memories will never fade
I will build a home
For happiness to be made
A place where your pain and fears will cascade

My mind never sleeps
Because my soul eternally weeps
My life is fading
I'm slowly cascading
My breathe is drawing thin
Death is beginning to win
Im hoping you'll notice the signs
Because within time
I hope to make you mine
So that I can truly shine
And hold back deaths grasp,
So fill the spaces between my fingers with yours
As they fit so perfectly
I'll be forever grateful
You stood by my side.

don't tell me that you fine
because you eyes  no longer shine
don't tell me that your okay
because your skin is turning grey
don't tell me it doesn't matter
because your mind is starting the scatter
don't tell me not to care
because ill always be there
don't tell me it'll be alright
because your not longer trying to fight
don't tell me i can't help
because your mind is starting to melt
don't tell me to leave
because ill forever have you in my head
hoping you don't wish your dead
so smile at the thought...

You're perfect

Would you rather be born great
Or be born into darkness and come out the other side knowing you were strong enough to fight your demons?

I was born and raised into neither instead I began to listen to the sorrows of my own demons and learn from there mistakes sometimes I confide in the darkness and listen carefully because when all is silent that's when you hear the words you minds trying to express

Comfort is something regularly
Found
But eyes like yours
And someone like you
Just isn't
So when you combine those three things
Perfection is created
You always said if you could choose
Itd be me without question
Fate played a cruel card
Some things are just never meant to be
I just wish it wasn't you and me

This picture I'm holding in my hand
Is falling through my fingers like sand
I'm forever wading through grief and despair
But I do not care
For fear drives us forward
Pain compels us to find relief
Shadows beckon for light
So do not fade
For I have made a discovery
For only a higher power may judge me
So just wait and you shall see
Who I really am
Not who society forces me to be

I am the architect
of my own destruction
So don't be under any assumption
That this is self inflicted pain
I just consume corruption
So when the devil returns
Relief is what I'll feel
Knowing this is the end of our deal

You know sometimes I think about if I'll ever find someone that loves how weird I am and respects me like you do, then I think about the fact your with someone and how that takes up sometime and I can't spend time with you as much as I want to, and if I found someone I'll have to give some of my attention to someone else then all I can think about is how I'd rather spend the rest of my life alone if it means I can give you all of my attention and care, and I'd happily be that guy that stands at the back of the room of your wedding drinking whiskey straight and the only reason I'm there is because I'd never miss seeing the happiest moment of your life and then I start to think about how you will never. Ever. understand how much I love you because I'd rather die alone then ever entertain the thought of losing you

i understand that maybe your not okay
And all you want is the doctors and the pain to go away
I'll stand by your side
holding your hand, I'll even be there when you try hide to escape the fear of feeling dead inside
But please forgive me when I spend
Too long away it's just every tear
That falls from your cheek
makes My heart feel weak behind closed doors
My inner being steps out of this shell
I've renamed hell, and sits alone stitching itself back together
And when it's done I put on my disguise and smile for you one more time

She told me if she could choose
It would always be me
but it only seem to hurt more knowing
I did all I could but it was just never meant to be
If she told me to wait
I'd stay right here
And my thoughts of you would never disappear

I met a girl that had eyes so wide,
they were a place for demons to hide.
They filled her with lies, self doubt, and different hair dyes,

trying to defend her heart, with a corrupt shield, thinking,
that maybe she could yield,
some form of defence.

But instead it swallowed her whole.

With no place to go and no place to feel herself,
she surrendered at the edge of a blade

until that last drop fell, and she smiled.

When we were young
We were invincible
No one could catch us
No one could stop us
Driving round the streets at night
Being chased in the moonlight
By everyone trying to hold us back
And in that moment it was silent
You dared me to trust you
What a mistake I made
What a silly game we played
I lost it all everylast bit
Well good, you can keep
Just don't come back

A simple vision

A simple smile

A simple greeting

A simple kiss

A simple wish

A simple dream

A simple thought of you and me

A simple memory of when you died

A simple memory of how much I cried

A simple pain that escalates

A simple reason why I shall never let a day go by, without making you proud of me where ever you may be

Why do you always
Reignite the fight
Shoot me down when I'm in flight
And then hide your cruelty out of sight
In a harsh attempt that I might
Just give in
To every sin
Just for the pleasure you'll win
You're Evil and corrupt
You have a demon within
You smile at the scars on my skin
And you don't stop
till the light in my eyes
Becomes dim
Then bring me back from the brink
And make my heart sink
I fall so hard I can't even think
About the pain you caused previously
I can't help that your smile
means so much to me  
I just wish everyone would see
That you may be a devil inside
But your always my girl to me.

Just like beauty, perfection is an opinion
It's designed and crafted ever so carefully
By the minds of us all
Opinions are unique
Just like the individual
That creates the fantasys and wild
Dreams that involve nothing but
What they perseve to be irreplaceable
And my idea of perfection
Is you

Don't pretend your sorry to make yourself feel better for the sins you created on the premise that you are who you are and you can't change because everyone can change you just refuse to,  accept one day you'll realise its all your fault and you could of done something about it but you just make out like you have a demon inside and you like to communicate with the devil because of your past stop making excuses for yourself, accept what you've done, because I did a long time ago I just can't watch you professionally destroy yourself anymore

when i feel dead
when life is merely a thread
will you sew me back together
will you find the pieces i left behind
will you find out where they go...
will you make sure my scares don't show
will you give me my life back
and make me glow

Look at what you've done
I used to enjoy the warmth of the sun
But locked away
Is where I stay
So thank-you for your time
But please give me back mine
Because it's starting to run out
And I've lost the energy to shout for help

look at me!
no. i mean it, look at me
how can you look right through me
like you don't even know me
i really wish you could see the damage your causing me
my minds unraveling into its self
its beginning to implode
i'm collapsing, my bodies fading
i no longer care about the words im saying
so just stay for one more day and ill find a way
to make everything okay

I want to be yours,
So stop shutting all the doors
I'm only trying to be perfect for you,
Because you deserve nothing better
I hate it when you no longer want to be here
Losing you is my biggest fear
When you want to leave the life you live
The worlds floor beneath me
Rapidly begins to collapse
That's when your mind falls into oblivion
A endless pit of treachery , misery and regret
So that is why my mind is set
To remind you of the feelings you felt
When we first met

Just watch
Just observe
Just listen to every word,
Just think
Just wait
Just recreate,
Just try and do
All the things I do for you
And I promise we could make it through

I remember the first time I saw you, the world stopped spinning that smile shone brighter then the earths sun it made me believe I could achieve true happiness I kept you locked away in my heart, right from the start this where you have stayed I even through away the key because I promised you I would never forget that little laugh you made and I prayed and I prayed and did everything I could to you believe I could hold you safe forever

They say the river runs deep
So at the bottom is where I sleep
Drowning in my pain
Blood no longer courses through my veins
No longer do I struggle to reach the top
My soul was burnt in a melting ***
I just want it to end
I just want it to stop

Just like a heart beat
I need you to breath
But just like a drug
I need you to feel sane
The idea of normality
Sinks into my soul
And I feel comfortable when your
Presence is near its like an angel
Wrapping me in her wings
I'm bullet proof
Protected from the devastation and corruption that would easily course through my veins
But she keeps me pure she keeps me free she makes it okay for me to be me

So lets start with rejection
And how it turns to obsession
the need and greed to find
a soul willing to stay
without needing to pray
they wont fade
so you know happiness won't be delayed
anymore and the time you've spent looking
wont eventually turn to a family booking
a sibling or sons funeral
hoping it doesnt turn communal
because the family doesnt want them all to know
you weren't strong enough
to stand up and show your pain inside
and they weren't there to find the signs
they wish you'd left behind

so lets end with acceptance
and how it turns to repentance
of the life you were given
and the fact you emptied your veins
to rid your body of all the names
of the people you thought you new
and knowing that no matter what you do
it just isn't enough for you to find a reason
to smile anymore, this is my closure
this is my end, this is a letter i wrote
to my friend, this is the start
of my design of how my end
will be defined

I've thought about this for some time now
How to explain my feelings for you
I could tell you the way your eyes make me tingle
And your smile makes my soul burn flames
Of overwhelming joy
But when all said and done
It comes down to those three words
Used so freely without thought
Used so carelessly without proper reason
But it's not for your outrageously good looks
Or sweetly blessed skin
It's the way you care for my thoughts
The way you I know you'll always be there
And for that I thank you
And for that I will always love you

I like to watch from a distance
Observe from a far
And listen to the sound of silence
I like how it makes a persons
Inner conscience come alive
Because when all said and done
We all have something to hide
So don't confide with your demons
They'll only pull you down
And When you lie still in
Your own Sea of treachery
They'll help you drown

A wise man once told me
You have to stand for something or you'll fall for everything

that was it. that moment
your eyes connected with mine
my world began to shine
can you not see what you do to me?
stay with me and ill let you see
the inner me
and that way i hope you stay
and i will not let you be caught by a frey
and alll my dreams will consist of wishing your pain away

When your mind becomes numb
When your emotions are gone,
When your anger is a time bomb,
When you cry out to the sky
Because your lonely and scared
But only the devil responds
Because god isn't there
Remember your better then
To let your life flow out your veins
Don't let your bones be the only thing that remains
Just remember what your once were
Remember what you can be
Remember who I am
Not who he wants you to see

I like to write because the words
That lay on this tear soaked page
Wrap around my heart and protect me,
It's not that they stop pain from getting in they stop my emotions from getting out and stop me from creating a storm in witch I can't control