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inevitable, i know...
unintentional most times, when
night time comes during broad daylight...
what i choose to forget
could not be kept at bay.
once in a while, comes visiting,
keeps popping up other times...
traces, droplets, sometimes snatches,
worse times, buckets-full......
bad, sad moments, hover, linger.

every former connection,
i want them ALL SEVERED from me...
distanced from my remaining years...
no more stabbing ache on my chest,
no more pin-pricking pain for me...
no more disturbing thoughts....

........at times such as this........
i struggle to be there,
where i'd rather be,
i need to be there....
for peace is all i ask for,
nothing more......
and peace is what would shower me,
there, where i always long to be...
...seated, contentedly...
with eyes half-closed, half-opened,
as  i take in a view of cool serenity
.........................always.......................
~­~~~~from my refuge by the sea~~~~~
...where i would be totally out of reach...
.......there, where my phantom fears......
....................d i s a p p e a r......................


              ~~~~~        

   (...a gloomy day, a gloomy write...)
              
Sally

     Copyright 2013
        Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
I can hear your spirit calling my name
The clay of my land invoking my name
My body is broken and my soul is gone

My principe Azteca resurrect from the dead
Heal my wounds to fight again
I only have my arrow and my bow
And like a hunter I will rescue my soul

Mi principe Azteca white men have come from a foreign land
They murdered our sisters and sons –believing we have no souls

They took our land
They took our gold
They took our freedom
Destroyed our souls in the altar of our gods

My principe Azteca kiss me with your lips of immortality
And with my bow and arrow i will aim straight to their hearts
becuase oh God they deserve to die

My principe Azteca sacrifice my heart
But please don’t let them suffer anymore
Let me rescue their souls.
Why do I sit here constantly pressing a button on my phone,
To make it light up,
Only to not see a text from my ex.
I'm trying to move on,
After all, he treated me like garbage,
but why do I still wait for his text?!
I'm losing my mind,
And I'm trying my best to move on in my life,
And distance myself from him for a while,
Only it's not working out,
I'm still waiting for his text.
Why?????????
 Oct 2013 Jose Remillan
Maddie
Something so serene about standing on the pier
While a beggin' street performer sang stairway to heaven.
Although not my favorite Zeppelin.
It was magic.
The wind carried the melodic tune.
That was it.
Everything and nothing.
One moment out of a million.

I hated the wind,
And the cold but,
In that moment I could see us there,
Growing old.

Your smile gave me warmth.
The closeness set me on fire.
In that instant,
I've never been higher.
No pipe, pill, or drink
Could make me feel,
Or make me think.
And I have to say.
It was one of my best days.
 Oct 2013 Jose Remillan
Maddie
Love
 Oct 2013 Jose Remillan
Maddie
Do people really know,
Are they just afraid to be alone?
How long does it take to figure,
A month, a day, more than a year?
Can you tell the moment its real?
Is it something you see, or something you feel?
People use the word in excess.
Would you still be in love if there was no ***?
 Oct 2013 Jose Remillan
Maddie
Body
 Oct 2013 Jose Remillan
Maddie
After all we've been through.
I'm still just a body to you.
My soul, emotions
They're not real,  
Or something you just can't feel?
Your eyes watched
As I continuously fell
What about My womb where your child Was held?
Remember when we said those words?
The three that mean
We
Were happy
Peacefully
Filled with glee
Then you broke it
You Shattered
Me.  
Again.
Here I am.
There you stand.
I'll give in.
Again.
Again.
 Oct 2013 Jose Remillan
Maddie
You pretended to care
Told me, "I will." and took me in,
Said something sweet.
You said what I want, but not what you mean.
We were seemingly so serene.
You promised me,
Not just in times of glee.
The happier we seemed to be,
The wishes, well were kept.
As soon as the wind kicked up,
You were emotionally inept.
You said I was the one.
Who knew you'd run.
I saw all your imperfections.
And lied to myself about every one.
Your lie was more,
But it was my favorite.
You'd quietly say,
"I love you too."
Because, sometimes a lie,
Is better than truth.
 Oct 2013 Jose Remillan
Maddie
When it comes to you,
I'll wait.
You're eyes are bait,
But I won't bite.
I'll sit up straight.
I'll respond,
Not instigate.
I promise,
I'll wait.
I've got time.
I'll need it at this rate.
 Oct 2013 Jose Remillan
Manonsi
I have become numb
Cold in comparison to the lighter days
Those days where the sun shone and the winds blew
And I only saw the beauty of the universe.
Chiseled too much, there are rifts in my soul
Too deep to be filled with sorry words
Too sharp to be wrapped by black silk,
Winding and knotted at my wrist.
But for all of these iced sorrows
There are springs of salt waters
Rooted in my ducts, gushing, flowing
Remembering all too soon, and by themselves
Past tears, past cries and sobs.
Did I challenge the fates
To see how much I could take without breaking?
I am far too bent to come back now.
I am not the person I once was
Too much has been lost, loss.
But I am broken now
I am cold now
When I see the sun shining and the winds blowing
I only see him
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