don’t like the teasing in my brain

I don’t ask for it, I am watching the simpsons

man that is soooo cool and he is sitting there

being my second daddy, because i hate him

If he wants me to muck with him

he needs to change his ways

because i know the problems of the poor people

yeah i am a loser to the rich arrogant ***** like him

he doesn’t like us poor people that is why he calls me a stupid little ****

but I say everyone knows that the poor are nicer people than the rich

like tony abbott is a real life *******

and me, well i don’t deserve these voices and i hate

people presuming i want to be someone else

i want to be like one person and that is Brian Allan

because i love my life too much to want to **** myself

you can’t get me the **** myself no way hoi zie

i am watching the wrestling on the simpsons and

abraham is a well known wrestler

that guy is treating me like an idiot and i am not an idiot

i want to get a gun and shoot him, but i don’t believe in violence

i don’t want to squabble with the poor, i am brian allan

and brian allan doesn’t do that

you see he thinks just because he nicked my lunch in the 70s

he owns my should for me to try and be a shy person

i don’t need to TRY and be an artist, I AM AN ARTIST

check my site, i have more artworks and writing online

than you have had hot dinners

please let me be someone you like don’t be horrible to me

i am a family person, sure mate

i haven’t committed a crime for 25 years and i have no intention of ever committing a crime again

i am not mucking with the drunks, who want too fight, i don’t do stupid **** violence

i am too shy to be a family person, but if you asked me to fight, i’ll say no

i am speaking up for myself, cause that is what i do

i have got futurama on now, and they are playing unchained melody, pretty cool stuff

i never really liked being shy with the kids opt adults or old fogies

i always liked the arts, i used to be a watcher, now i am a doer

i don’t seeing patrick rolling around l;ike a crazy person in an hallucination

because i liked how patrick showed me how to PARTY when i was young

that man says why did you muck with the ****, i said i AM ONLY A ****

to the guy that nicked my lunges point of view, cause he is weird

because i am a family person, sure mate

i am watching an add, about shopping for camping supplies

i am a writer, now man, i am an artiist now, man

i don’t believe in viiolence ever in my life

that was in dads voices that fighting man of mine

i never laid a finger on anyone in my life

I am a poor man who is poorer than any rich  *****
I would love to tread on the rich  
I want to destroy what the rich do for us
Because it is mostly ******* the poor around
I wish the rich would give the poor some money
To make our days worth while
But instead they give us not much in our pensions
Yeah I would love to tread on the rich
You see rich Christians believe in money and power rather than give their money to the poor
You see rich people get to sit in a box at the footy getting wine soft drink and beer and nibbles
If a poor man eats any of their food
They will kick us out of the place
I am poor and penniless with no money to get me by
I would love to tread on the rich
You see because of the rich
We are suffering every day
It is not so good at all
Being poor ***** and I think it would be great if we just tread on the rich
They don't care if we suffer
They don't care if we are penniless
They wouldn't give a **** if we never get rich
I just want to tread oh really tread
I want to tread on the rich

When I work outside I look up
Making it hard to do the work
I want it to stop
Because working is making a difference
And that is what I like to do
I believe in reincarnation
But it isn’t my job
I have powers to bring people to their next lives
But I want to have an earth job
Where I can improve my mental wellbeing
I want to pick up glasses in a club
But with the clubs shut at the moment
I can’t do that yet
I want to clean in a hotel
I have experience but with nobody
Holidaying at the moment
It will be hard
And I don’t want to catch the coronavirus
I would like to do cleaning in a office
Like get picked up early
And clean the office
Before the workers arrive
But I don’t know if there is much work
Like that at the moment
I would like to learn how to work with horses, ya know get confident with animals but I worry about hurting myself hard
I can’t work in a hospital
Cause of my past
I would like to write for theatre or television
But it might be hard to do that kind of work
But I want to make a voice for the community
I would like to do paid work so I will have money for things
I would like to work at big football matches selling food
But I did that and I am sick of that
But overall I want this virus to be over
So I can have face to face meetings
With my advocate because
The phone interview isn’t working

I was a cat in my previous life
I used to jump on things
I had a master who picked me up
And through me to the other side
I was orange and white
And I lived with the Dunbar family
They used to play with me so rough
And the young kids thought they were tough
I was a cat a cute little cat
And I lived in Adelaide
I feel the father is picking me up
To put me on his lap
You see that is my story when I was young
It wasn’t me getting teased
It is the fact I have had interesting previous lives
You see I played with the other cats
And run away from dogs
Sit with the kids as we listened to the radio
and I played with them
You see each kid put their hands on my leg
And gave me a tickle
And after that I ate my fave food
A nice juicy pickle
When the mother cooked a meal with mince
I jumped up to take a sniff
And I sometimes grab a bit for myself
You see I was a playful little cat
In one of my previous lives
I am feeling it now
Because one of my owners might have died
What a ****** for them
But I was their cat
But now I am a man with commitments

Having fun having fun
Having so much fun
Not breaking any laws
Opening many doors
Yes I am having fun
You see I wanna be a video streamer
I prefer it to a cleaner
It has a life I want to have
I have got a new bed
For Margaret John and Greg
But they don’t want it
So I will use it rest my young fresh leg
Party up in the solar system yeah
I used to be a rebel
Nearly getting kicked out of my house
For bad language
And I know how it feels to be not wanted
But now I have my teddies
On my cupboard and in my bedding
Yes I am cool oh yeseree
I watch shameless cause it is about
A poor family with an alcoholic dad
You see I occasionally was like him
Bit o was trying to be young
And I had a lot of fun
With my party on dude kinda ways

I was a really cool kid
I wasn’t getting teased bullied or fought
I was just a cool kid to the men
Oh yeah a really cool kid
I did farts, people said I was a child
I said yes I am a kid a really really really cool kid
They thought I was a tad dumb
I never knew where my meals were coming from
I was just a tad dumb
I was a really cool kid
I wasn’t getting teased or bullied or fought
I was way to smart for that
Yes I am a really cool kid
I went to pubs to dance with the chicks
And when I drank I was a lunatic
But everyone liked me in there
You see I had my fair share of problems when people yelled at me because I was cool I was a really cool kid
I was a really cool kid
I have never gotten teased or bullied or fought
Never never never a cool kid to a fight
I just wanted to be cool
I ain’t a gay no no
People get the wrong impression that I like men
I prefer to just drink with the men
And if I have *** it will be with the ladies
I am a really cool kid
People used to say what are you looking at Turk they just were being nice to me
Thinking that is what I really want
I am a really cool kid
I am a really cool kid
I will never get teased bullied or fought
I just will get mucked with oh yeah
As I party on
As I party on, dudes

hi dudes

you see as a kid, i was a bit of a brat,i hated the way that dad was

but that was because i hardly knew him, and i didn’t know the reason

why he was like a cotton wool type of adult, cotton flaming wool, what a joke

ya see dad showed me, his way, he takes no **** from anyone especially his kids

you see he felt he had to say, i wasn’t a young dude, meaning the young dudes

who look like they are going to **** their parents, or the young dudes, who take

off on an adventure not knowing where we’ll end up, and dad isn’t very fond of

this teasing parents thing,  especially when the teasing was from all the wrong reasons

and the reason why visioned dad do that again, cause he got me an iPad, and in

my psychotic episode, i threw it over the balcony, and i felt i disgraced the good

nature dad brought to me, i upset him when i said go back to smoking,k cause

he wasn’t helping me, by treating me like a little shy boy, and i disgraced dad

when i said, i hated his version of adult, you see dad was worried about the

kinds of dangers i will be in, if i tried to be a family person or young dude.

i keep telling dad, as far as my own world goes, i prefer to play shows in my room

rather than bringing that shy boy from wood berry back, just because i accidentally

lost my phone, you see dad expects me to be perfect, cause when i said, it happened

to everyone, he disagreed, and said, i was the only one, to lose my phone, as a tease.

i liked when one kid in canberra said, i was like us, man, but many delusions came out

of my head from that day, about this kid, putting himself in danger of kidnapping for me.

but he ain’t my daddy buddy.

and dad implied that, if i **** him or fight him, i will be a worthless heap of **** or a loser

and then i heard voices from the guy behind our house, Ralph, who said, i don’t think

it’s right to yell at your parents, cause they are trying to help you, and give you happiness

and then ralph implied that, it isn’r any of my business why he fights his parents, and told

me, I’m shouldn’t be a hooligan, i should be a young dude, let my dad think he has won,

cause i should be a young dude to dad and mum and my brothers point of view, cause

i used to be wild, as, and i know your brother was a yeah mate yeah kid, but we ain’t

treating you like a cool kid to us, buddy, let your family think they have won the war,

take one for the team, your parents are trying to protect you, buddy.

yeah, i know it’s fun to tease your family why they are like this, and you might look like me, ralph said

to your father, cause your parents are helping you understand, buddy, mine never did, said ralph

your mum and dads cotton wool is silly, but you need to get past this, if ya want the next step

of family person to come to you, buddy, the next step of buddy, but i am not ya daddy though,

i know your dad, was hard to understand, but he doesn’t **** us off, like ya mum or you or your

brother, buddy, your family just don’t want to see you arrested for slander, buddy, ya know that,

don’t ya buddy.

and your old mates were making fun of their good nature, i know they were weird, but they were nicde

to you buddy, ok, i am quite happy to tease the old hags with you, but you must realise, your parents are nice,

and your faster would be a yeah mate yeah kid, you saw the way he was buddy, stop trying to be shy

just like us, *******.

but i don’t want to be a shy person, and ralph said, no your father is treating you like a kid there, ya know

and i said, i am a therapy writer and therapy artist, and a poet and a youtube entertainer, ralph said

yeah, but your still nice, ya see, we treated ya like a nice person, your not like us, TAKE YOUR MEDICATION

BUDDY, TO LEAVE THIS US NOW MAN, CRAP, AWAY FROM US,

i loved my parents, i was just trying to be cool like my school mates, buddy, my parents were weird, but they

loved me a lot, i want to make a mockery of them, but dad and mum were worried, young dudes will take it

the wrong way, saying i am a shy person, no i am a famous writer, artiist and youtube and internet entertainer

and i am cooler than they are, i think i am adopted, cause i am different to they are, but all my problems were

based on previous lives, not friends or family or myself.

HI DUDES



I WAS BAD WHEN I WAS A KID, I USED TOM GRAB KIDS LEFT RIGHT AND CENTRE

AND MY MATE AND DAD WAS TRYING TO KEEP ME WITH MY BROTHER AND MOTHER

BUT MY ANXIETY SHOWED ME, I WAS HATING TO DO THINGS WITH PARENTS

THE ANXIETY ALSO SHOWS ME, THAT I AM TRYING TO CATCH THE NICE ME

FROM WITHIN, YOU SEE WHEN I WAS YOUNG I FELT A BIT STICKY, AND I FOUND

IT HARD TO GET OUT OF THAT TRAP, BECAUSE STEVEN BRADLEY AND THE WITCH

DOCTOR, JOINED FORCES WITH TED BUNDY, TO TRAP ME, AND KEEP ME PRESSURED

TO FOREVER BE FIGHTING THE YOUNG DUDES, ACTUALLY TED BUNDY TOLD THE WITCH DOCTOR

THAT HE WANTS FOR HIS MATES TO TREAT ME LIKE LYLE, AND THEN MAKE ME JITTER SAYING

1 MINUTE A HOOLIGAN, 1 MINUTE A FAMILY PERSON, 1 MINUTE A FAMOUS PERSON, AND

THEY MADE TED BUNDY TURN ME INTO A REAL SHYPERSON, SURE I DREW THE TRIANGLE

ON MY ARM WITH A SPEAR THROUGH THE CENTRE, EXPLAINING, THAT SOMEONE ALWAYS

RAINS ON MY PARADE, AND I DON’T WANT TO LET THAT GET IN THE WAY, OF ANY FUTURE

WITH ACTING I HAVE LEFT, YOU SEE, MY MATE SAID, COME ON BRIAN LEAVE THE FAMILIES

ON THEIR OWN, COME ON BRIAN LEAVE THOSE FAMILIES ON THEIR OWN, AND I SAID

NEH, I DON’T WANT TO, YOU SEE, I HAVE A STORY TO TELL, YOU SEE I LOVE HEAVY METAL MUSIC

BUT I STILL LIKE IT, AMONGST EVERYTHING.

YOU SEE I LOIVE CHRISTMAS, AND I SEE THIS BIG MAN SAYING I AM PUMPING UP IN A BIG BALLOON

I SAY SOMETHING, AND HE WILL PUMP UP AND ANOTHER WORD IS SAID, AND HE PUMPS UP AGAIN

AND I SAY SOMETHING ELSE AND HE PUMPS UP YET AGAIN, AND THEN, HE WILL SIT THERE

LAUGHING WITH THE MEN, OR IS HE LAUGHING WITH THE LADIES. IS HE LAUGHING WITH

THE YEAH MATE YEAH KIDS, OR IS HE LAUGHING WITH THE COOL KIDS, OR IS HE LAUGHING WITH

THE OLD LADIES, OR IS HE LAUGHING WITH THE OLD MEN, IS HE LAUGHING WITH THE ANIMALS

OR BETTER STILL IS HE LAUGHING WITH THE LADIES, IS HE PUMPING HIS BODY UP TIGHTLY

EVERY TIME I MOVE AROUND, AND WHEN I MOVE AROUND THE HOUSE, HE’LL SAY SIT DOWN

WOOSEY YOUR NOT LIKE US, AND AND THEN AS I SIT ON THE COMPUTER, HE IS PUSHING ONTO

THE COMPUTER, CAUSE HE WANTS TO BE A LITTLE YEAH MATE YEAH KID OR A SPOILT LITTLE KID

THE LADIES SAY I MIGHT HAVE A CUP OF COFFEE, AND THIS KID SAID, I WILL SETTLE FOR A TOFFEE

EVERY TIME I GO ON THE COMPUTER, I AM WRITING A BLOG, TO SHOW EVERYONE WHAT IS GOING

ON IN MY BRAIN, SHOWING EACH THING THAT MADE MY BRAIN TICK, YEAH, AT PRESENT I AM BEING

REMINDED OF HOW I LOOKED LIKE TO THE CROWD IN THE EARLY 1990S, WHEN I DID NOTHING

AND I LEFT THE HOMEBODIES ON THEIR OWN, I DON’T WANT TO GET ALZEIMERS DISEASE, BUT

I FEEL, I NEED TO KEEP MY BRAIN GOING LIKE SITTING ON THE COUCH, DOING MY CREATIVITY

I FEEL THESE MATES ARE TRYING TO GET ME TO GET OFF THE COMPUTER, AND HE CALLS ME

A WOOSEY, I LOVE LIFE, MORE THAN RICH PEOPLE, I LOVE EVERYONE IN LIFE THE RICH ONLY

LOVES THE WEALTHY PEOPLES LIFE.

I WATCH THE FOOTBALL AND I SUPPORT THE SYDNEY SWANS, AND ALL THE OTHER INTERSTATE

TEAMS, AND NOW, I CAN HERE HIM SAYING SHUT UP BABY IN MY HEAD, BUT, WITH ME, I HATE

WHEN PEOPLE TRY AND MAKE ME A COMPUTER NERD,I AM POSITIVE ABOUT TV IN MY FUTURE

I WILL GET MY WISH ABOUT BEING FAMOUS, I PREFER TO STREET FIGHT ON TV AND PRETEND

RATHER THAN ACTUALLY FIGHT, THAT SOUNDS COOOOOL, PRETENDING TO FIGHT ON TELE

Because I was a real homebody when I was young and I was a bit shy as well, I used to get teased by my peers, people used to lock me in rooms and ask me for money every single day, I got sick of it, you see I was going to the mall in the early 90s and people treated me like a walking ATM and I didn’t have the heart to say no despite being poor myself and I began to muck around and I went into civic to play the video games at happy days and then people used to frown at me, I didn’t like that, like, why frown at me, I love life I believe in being nice to everyone but I did tease a few people myself and they might have been saying trying to be a kid are you, trying to be a kid are you, sure mate
I wanted to be left alone because I thought I met the perfect friend who allowed me to try and be like others but he would prefer me to just be myself, I tried to be a cool boy going from the mall into civic and Woden and Tuggeranong but all I was talking about was tv shows I watched last night or music that I liked and I acted a bit silly, boy was I very silly and then when people were laughing and having a good time I came around and thought to myself
I want to have a good time, I love life, but they just laughed at me and the kids just frowned at me saying trying to be a kid are you and then a few kids ganged up on me and started teasing me, I hated it but I tried to be cool for them for my mate Patrick but they were teasing me to treat me like a shy person walking through the mall and then the young men then had a go at teasing me, but it wasn’t Patrick, so I started to try and be like him but they started to tease me as I left the mall and they came in the mall and as they teased me I got carried away and teased him back but I was too silly to go home and every time I saw Patrick in the mall I looked at him in saying people are teasing me, please be a good friend and stop them, they are treating me like a shy person and as I ate mcdonalds I felt like a little baby young dude and then I went around the mall teasing all the men and the kids and the young dudes were frowning at me saying ******* Turk so we can get on with our lives but learning what pat and dad taught me, I said you can’t make Brian Allan ******* but this made the kids tease me even more by frowning at me and asking for money and smokes it drove me crazy and some of the young dudes would call me Woosey as they banged the tapes on their heads, and they kept doing it, I was looking up to Patrick saying, I am not a woosey hey pat and every time I sat with them, they ate McDonald’s and the smell nearly made me sick, well it sort of made me sick and I went around thinking this was bad, but if they can tease me, I will make other people to scared to be seen here but now I feel awful because I stooped down to their level, which is something my dad had told me not to do and people were getting cranky at me in the club when I thought they were my mates, you see I just wanted to be normal average man who loved life and partied in every club, and I got totally wasted and I got kicked out of town centre tavern (now the basement) and I nearly got kicked out of the mall for fighting but I tried to be cool after this bloke yelled at me and then punched me, I left but I came back to the mall 2 days later because I was being an adult enjoying the mall’s atmosphere and I suddenly saw the mall was changing, no more fighting the party dude which was me and kids were cooler than those kids who teased me back then and now I feel safe and I am on medication so I don’t try and be like my peers
And I vomited on McDonald’s which turned me off it for life
I still party like crazy but I try and use my medication right to ignore teasing in the future so the adults don’t get sick of me

Glenn Johnston never never cared
About my future goals
Unless they had something to do with
Fitness oh yeah
To him I was an ornament
On his Facebook page
You see he pushed me hard
Even if I lost weight
He’ll make me lose more
It was such a pain ya see
You see I won a medal
For losing the most weight
But I would prefer to win
An award in relations to my art
He said to always run
And he never cared
And he only did support worker
For the money yeseree
All he really cared about
How good it made him look
Like one of his clients
Was actually doing well
I am glad Glenn is in gaol
Because he was a ****
Never cared for my future goals in work
He probably said it was unfair
That I was getting help
While he had to figure it out for himself
But he wanted to push discipline into you
To make me fully functional oh yeah
I hate that ****** ****
Glenn Johnston needs to change
Because he has no right to
Push discipline especially
When he doesn’t follow it himself
You see being perfect was his game
But that isn’t my game
******* ya ****

fat kid, oh fat jkid, oh where are you fat kid


i am really fat kid, full of muscles ya see

i love cream buns, ****** oath i am a big big big big man

what do ya think about that, puny little cool kid

i love my beautiful spring rolls as well as a coca cola to wash it down with

that is mighty fine, oh yeah

and the kids went up to me, and said fat kid fat kid fat kid, you are a fat kid

i said, i am not a kid, for i am an adult, who lives life like it’s one big adventure after the next

as i said, i am known as the fat kid, the really big fat kid

i love spring rolls, cream buns, and a coca cola

and i love lamingtons, as well, and i love meat pies and sausage rolls

which makes me a real australian *****, ****

and a custard ****, i can lick the fat right off  that

and the voice came from out of the blue

fat kid fat kid, you are a fat kid, and another voice says

your not an adult, adults are cool, and i said, i am cool on the computer, ****

and then i said, i am so an adult, a creative adult, a good fooler\

i try to be a cool kid, to gain protection, but reality i am a cool adult

and i don’t appreciate being treated like a fat kid

i am a cool adult who loves to PARTY

an adult PARTY dude so to speak

I was well
When I had Foxtel in my flat at the back
Of my parents house
I did volunteer work and I went on bush walks with leap frog adventures
And I did performing arts
I was talking to people on the bus
I was well
I was happy and as soon as I started to power walk I started doing things wrong
I thought the police were going to look at me as being a great volunteering man
Who wanted to work in a good job
I could do it I just needed to relax at the end of the day and watch Foxtel
And I killed the cat and the police were looking down on me saying I did something wrong and I need to be punnished and I wanted people to understand I wasn’t a criminal
But that is what they treated me like
And I stayed there for 4 weeks and I got out
And I was saying weird things but I didn’t really want to be as sick as I was
And I got back into volunteer work and 3 years later I moved out but I had no Foxtel
So I had to watch shows on free to air
And I did and after that I got iiNet internet and it was like Foxtel and I enjoyed it but I had a negative friend even when I worked I tried to ignore him and started working 3 days a week and I was working at ainslie village and on construction sites and actew and I loved being a working man but I was running to and from work and doing art in front of the television and after a while I was throwing everything out of the balcony because I was hearing voices and the police put me in the paddy wagon and off to the psych ward where people treating me like I was an idiot and renald told them I like doing art which I did in there and some girl held a plastic fork to my arm and people said if I come to the psych ward I have to cope with the problems and everyone wasn’t very helpful with me
Never again but I could have those problems again if I don’t get help
I was well

I felt good today
Cause toddy I decided to go back
To swimming in which I am
Planning to do every Tuesday
I did about 30 laps and
I wore a black swimming cap
And my blue goggles
As well as my red swimmers
It only cost me $5-20 to get in
And $6-00 for the cap
I caught the bus there
The new R9 bus from
The Belconnen bus station
To the AIS, yes I swam in the
AIS 25 metre pool
It was a great workout for my body
30 laps that is cool
I want to make a habit
Of doing that every Tuesday
I thought of dad who loved to swim
That is where he died doing swimming
But I shouldn’t worry about that
Different things happen to different people and I had fun swimming for 30 laps of a 25 metre pool
Please Buddha make dads next life
Betty Campbell inspire people like I just did because I was having fun doing laps of the pool before
And I had fun today
Totally awesome dudes
I feel like a real man

I just got home after seeing the documentary movie called the Australian dream which is about Adam Goodes who was my favourite player back in the day and I saw that he was a victim of racial bullyism which was discraceful I never knew that, that kind of racism exists in this modern times and I learnt that people weren’t looking at it as being racist but they were being racist and those people need to be taught a lesson in being moral, I never watched the footy show afl much because it was boring but Sam Newman needs to be taught a big lesson in racism because what he did was racist and Adam Goodes was just sticking up for himself because these words really hurt him, I just remember Goodesy for the great player he is, and I continued to support him as he really won the match for Sydney swans and people shouldn’t hate him because he is black because nobody booed tony Lockett and Warwick capper even if they had weird ways as well Lockett used to nudge a bit and capper used to wear short shorts and they supported them and I em not against these players though I just think it is a bit low to yell out racial words to Goodes I think the country that we live in should honour aborigines after all they are the founders of our land long before captain cook came to invade it
I thought Australian dream was great and I recommend it for anyone who wants to honour the founders of our land and the greatest player Sydney swans ever had, I think it was cool that he got Australian of the year and in fact I drew a picture of him as Australian of the year and he won two Brownlow medals and he was the best player around I remember him taking his marks and scoring goals what a legend of the game he was
I do recommend Australian dream to anyone who wants to stop being racist and to others who really likes goodesy like me, I am not the only one who had him as my favourite player
I am totally sure of that
Sydney Sydney Sydney oi oi oi
On ya goodsey

it’s amazing how i could transfer myself into a girl


you see i have this problem of seeing on the floor

so i do the girl thing, and sit down on the toilet to do a wee

it works, because ire’s embarrassing to be a guy

so i sit down on the toilet an d wee, and nothing goes on the floor

i don’t care if i look like a girl, it’s better than seeing my pants

and it’s better than being treated like a little yeah mate yeah kid

because if you have problems with seeing on the floor

you sit down and be a girl, and wee sitting down

i know it seems weird, but i am a girl

i have problems seeing on the floor, so i will be a girl

i don’t want to be an embarrassment to the guys or any other member of the human

i know i am getting help with my housework, by home help

but at least i am trying to better myself, so i will be a girl, to stop me seeing on the floor

because the guy life doesn’t work for me, so i will be a girl

do my art and sit down on the toilet, so nothing goes on the floor

i get fungus on my feet, because i am grotty, but i am no little baby kid

i am dealing with my problems ok, and if that means i have to be a girl, so be it

you see i hear voices of mates saying, shut up baby shut up baby

because i am too babyish to be a bloke, because the little girl life is better for me

i am no koomarri man, i don’t know how to be as perfect as my dad was

so i be a little girl and sit down on the toilet

i am a man who sees like a girl, cause the man life don’t work for me

i am a man who sees like a girl, cause i can’t help it if i stand ***, i wee on the seat and floor

so i sit down and wee like a little girl, better than the yobbos, hey

i am now a little girl, i wee in the toilet better if i sit down

cause i am not a messy little kid, no way hoizei

you see i have problems with cleanliness as well, so i am getting help

so i sit on the toilet to avoid seeing on the floor

i am not shy to be a little girl, aren’t i

C’mon guys let’s gather around
And tease the shyperson
But he isn’t a shy person
He is like us
And then he grabbed him by the *****
Creating an itch
Saying tease him dudes and hit him on the head
And hit him in the grind
We need to make him shy
He hasn’t any super powers
And then he reached down again into his ***** creating another itch
Saying I am teasing you
And then he said I am no longer a man
I am too shy to talk to your father
Hide in your house
You are getting robbed now mate
Just sit there and let me rob you
I might need a gun
Or a pocket knife
And then he reached down into my *****
And creating another itch
And if you keep reaching into my *****
I cut your hand off with my pocket knife
And he said I am teasing you
Hit you buddy in the head
If you want to young man, listen
To what I say as I am reaching
Into you creating an itch

My friend is negative now
But his next life is not going to be negative
Even if he might not want to do anything
He will be doing something
He can’t expect a more perfect life
If he kills himself
Because I find it is totally stupid
To hang around a negative **** like that
No he is going to be great
He will be positive
He will have friends
He will do things he doesn’t want to do in this life
If he lives in New York
Even if he doesn’t want to
He will attempt to go on Broadway
And perform great
He will be the star of his city
If he lives in London
He will be a part of London city voices
And the New Year’s Day parade
If he lives in Amsterdam
He will be doing things like
Performances at school
Like concerts and choirs and plays
He will be doing theatre
To make him positive mate
I can’t do this in this life for him
But there is no way he is going to be LAZY
Even if he lives in the USA
He will try baseball
Even if his negative life finds it boring
If he lives in Australia
He will try AFL even if his negative life
Doesn’t like it
I would like him to live in New York
But there is no way his negative life
Will have a say what he does
He will try broadway
He will try baseball
He will try church
He will try basketball
He will try ice hockey
He will try water polo
Maybe an Olympic position could happen for him
I want the day he dies to be the end of his negative soul leaving
You will live with your family
I will make sure you are in a loving family
And a family that realises your next life’s full potential
If you get asked to perform in a parade you will do it and ignore your last life’s negative mind even if he hated that city
Because I don’t want this negative life to die to be a cat
No he needs to learn people are nice to each other
And yes make his next life’s family
Keep him away from the news
The source of his negativity
Help make his life good till he dies
To come back to be more positive

I wish Canberra would be cool
Instead of arguing with each other
They sing songs to make each other laugh
I wish Canberra would be cool
Instead of seeing people sitting
On the grass in a public pathway
Have them sit in a homeless shelter eating a very nice meal
I wish Canberra would be cool
Instead of just having boring events that only idiots like
How about bring the exciting things back like Christmas tree lighting ceremonies etc etc
I wish Canberra would be cool
Instead of people being big rich ******
They should try and figure out ways to help the less fortunate
I wish Canberra would be cool
Instead of people trying to save every tree, support something cool like the light rail and see the value of it in the future
I wish Canberra would be cool
In these times of covid 19
Instead of thinking I wish it was over
They try and figure out what they can do to keep people being cool
I wish Canberra would be cool
They should help support the holidays that makes everyone happy like Halloween instead of just supporting things to make number 1 happy like bake sales
I wish Canberra would be cool
Well they do put on
Music festivals
Christmas carols
New Year’s Eve shows
Park festivals
Family fun days
Sporting events
Christmas tree lighting ceremonies
Art shows
Big concerts by the worlds biggest bands
Street parties
I wish Canberra would be cool
And I think Canberra has been showing signs of being cool
We need to be patient

I INSPIRED THIS SHOW, BUT THROUGH EMAILS, CAUSE SINCE DAD DIED
I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO BURY THAT OLD KODGER, YA SEE I KNOW DAD HELPED
A LOT OF PEOPLE, BUT TREATING ME LIKE A LITTLE SHY BOY, LIKE THE WAY
HE DID, WASN'T HELPING ME, I WAS TRYING TO BUILD MY LIFE, AND LIKE
NORMAL KIDS, I ARGUED WITH MY PARENTS, AND DAD, DESPITE HELPING
MY BROTHER AND MOTHER, AND OTHER MEMBERS OF THE COMMUNITY
AND FAMILY, HE REALLY NEVER HELPED ME, IN THE SAME WAY, HE SHOULD'VE
TRIED TO FIGURE OUT WHY I WAS FIGHTING HIM, I DON'T WANNA HEAR HIS
VOICE IN DEATH, SAYING, SHUT UP DUMMY, TO EVERYONE ELSE DAD HELPED THEM
TO ME, DAD LOOKED LIKE, THE OLD GRUMBLE *** FATHER, ON THE WONDER YEARS, IT LOOKED LIKE, HE WANTS TO TEASE, THERE ARE WAYS, FOR DAD
TO BREAK, HIS PRECIOUS ROUTINE, TO BE A BETTER FATHER TO ME, HEW
SEEMED TO THINK THAT I WANTED TO BE A LITTLE SHY BOY TO HIM, BACK THEN
IT FUCKEN MADE ME SCARED OF DAD, IN A WAY, AND ALL THAT TRIGGERED OFF
WHEN I TOLD THEM, YOUR NOT MY REAL PARENTS, TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH
DAD WAS A LITTLE SHY BOY, CAUSE HE SO NAIVE, THINKING I WANTED TO
BE TREATED LIKE A COOL KID, OR A MANS KID TO A FIGHT, I DID ALL THAT
TO TRY AND EXPLAIN TO DAD, THAT, I DON'T WANT TO BE A COOL KID TO HIM
DAD WAS SQUARE, VERY SQUARE, AND DESPITE ME TRYING TO UNDERSTAND
HIM, I STILL THINK DAD WAS SQUARE, NOW, I KNOW PAT ISN'T MY DADDY, BUT
HE HELPED ME MORE THAN DAD DID, LIKE SHOWING ME HOW TO BE COOL
DAD DIDN'T WANNA BE COOL, BUT I HATED DADS DISCIPLINE, RIDUAL, LIKE
TRYING TO STOP ME FROM BEING A BIG MANS KID, PLAYING SHOWS IN MY ROOM
EVERY TIME I SQUABBLED WITH DAD, I HATED HOW, HE WAS TRYING TO GET
THE L;AST FUCKEN WORD, I TRIED TO BE A COOL KID TO DAD, BY JOKING LIKE
A COOL KID DOES, BUT MAYBE DAD WAS WORRIED ABOUT THE TEASING LIKE
ALL PARENTS, YEAH, LIKE ALL KIDS, I HATED, BEING THE YMCA'S DIRECTORS SON
BUT, THIS WAS DADS LIVELIHOOD, I CAN'T STOP DAD, TRYING TO BE A GOOD FATHER, LATELY, I HEAR DADS VOICE SAYING, SHUT UP DUMMY, I AM NOT DUMB
I AM A NORMAL PERSON, WITH A SLIGHT INTELLECTUAL DISABILITY, AND DAD
TREATING ME LIKE A LITTLE SHY BOY, MADE ME FEEL, LIKE A REAL LOSER, WELL
NOW DAD, HAS TO YA KNOW PROVE HIMSELF TO ME, AND BUDDHA WITH ADVICE
FROM ME, PUT DAD IN LISA CAMPBELL'S ******, AND HIS FATHER IS DAVID
CAMPBELL, TO TRY AND SHOW, ME, WHAT DAD WAS DOING, CAUSE, I REALLY
HATED, BEING TREATED LIKE A LITTLE SHY BOY LIKE THE WAY DAD TREATED ME LIKE ONE, IT WAS SHOWING, THAT DAD WAS IN FAVOUR, OF THE HORRIBLE
TEASING THAT WAS HAPPENING, I THINK MY VOICES, HAVE MORE PROTECTION
THAN DAD, EVER COULD, I KNOW DAD, DROVE ME TO BASKETBALL GAMES
AND TO FRIENDS HOUSES, BUT THIS SQUABBLING WITH HIM AND MUM, GARBAGE
I REALLY HATED, I HATE BEING TREATED LIKE DAD, AROUND MY HOUSE, I HATE
BEING TREATED LIKE A COOL KID TO A TEASE, TO ANYONE, I HATE TEASING
FUCKEN LEAVE ME ALONE, YOU BIG OLD FOGIE, DAD, ALL YOU WERE DAD
IS AN OLD FOGIE, AND DESPITE ME TRYING TO REACH OUT TO YOU, YOU
STILL WANTED EVERYONE ELSE TO LIKE YOU, AND CARE ABOUT ME, I WALKED
AROUND CIVIC ALL NIGHT, CAUSE NATURALLY I WAS WORRIED ABOUT GOING
HOME AND BEING TREATED LIKE A LITTLE SHY BOY, SO I HUNG AROUND THE
CIVIC, TRYING TO BE A YOUNG DUDE, I TOLD DAD TO **** A LEMON, IN THE
NOTION, DAD WILL SAY, I DON'T WANT TO TEASE, BRIAN, BUT, WHAT IS WRONG
WITH ME HAVING AN IMAGINATION, IT'S BETTER THAN DADS ****** NOTION
OF ME BEING TOO SHY FOR THE REAL WORLD, CAN'T DAD MISS THE FUCKEN
NEWS, TO TRY AND UNDERSTAND, HIS SON, AS OPPOSED TO TRYING TO SQUABBLE WITH ME, I KNOW DAD HELPED, BUT I HATED DAD DOING ALL THIS
HE WAS A REAL ******, YEAH I WAS NICER TO MY MATES, BUT DAD WAS
TO ME AN OLD GRUMBLE ***, AND I THOUGHT DAD WAS A LITTLE SHY BOY,
ALL BECAUSE, I DESTROYED HIS AURA, THIS SHOW EXPLAINS, HOW I VISIONED
DAD BEFORE ALL THIS LITTLE SHY BOY CRAP, A NICE MAN WHO HELPS HIS
KIDS HANDLE THE REAL WORLD, BUT IN THE 80S, I VISIONED DAD, AS A
STUPID OLD KODGER, WHO IS SCARED, OF HIS KIDS GETTING TEASED
TAKING MY FOOTY AWAY, CALLING ME DUMMY, TRYING TO TREAT ME LIKE AN
ADUKT, NOBODY WANTS TO BE, STOPPING ME FROM BEING A YOUNG DUDE
IN THE WRONG WAY, I KNOW DAD TRIED TO HELP, BUT, I HATED BEING TREATED
LIKE A LITTLE SHY BOY LIKE THAT, I WANT TO LIVE MY LIFE LIKE IT'S ONE BIG
ADVENTURE, DAD, MOVE FUCKEN ON TO DAVID AND LISA CAMPBELL'S FAMILY
WITH ROBIN WILLIAMS, STOP SAYING SHUT UP DUMMY, LET ME BE COOL, YO ****

I've got an itchy ***
I've got an itchy ***
It could be worms or diabetes
Or it could be cosmic demons
Trying to capture me
I have no idea of what it is
It's just an itchy ***
You see as I walk I sort of feel a worm crawling up my ***
I wish he would get out
Oh yeah as I yelled GET OUT
I just wish the itch would ******* away from me
Cause I've got an itchy ***
It is so itchy as
I wish my thoughts were different
I wish it was just an itchy ***
But thinking it's worms or diabetes really scares me yeah
I wish it will go away
******* itchy ***
I want to get on with my life
And I don't want an itch on my bottom annoying me
I know if I ignore it
It will go away
Yeah my itchy ***

I want to help street kids
Give them a great new home
Like a hotel with a hotel atmosphere
I want a bar downstairs
With really cool music
And video games
Doctors and dentists offering
Free checkups
And social workers helping them with social issues
I want kind men playing Santa Claus asking each one what they want for Christmas
I want each kid to have
There very own buddy
To help them become good socially
And people taking them on holidays to various locations around Australia at a budget
And if they get appriopiate funding around the world
I want them to get the chance
To go to the footy or any other sports events or concerts of family fun days etc
I just want to help street kids
Because a lot of them
Have nothing

If I could change the negativity that comes out of my friend Daniels mouth I would
I would make sure he wouldn’t feel that people are doing things with his food
I would make the hospitals give him operations to make his eyes better
I would make some people keep their religious and political beliefs to themselves
I would make the television stop talking to him like bert newton waving at him and saying the hovel that you live in
I would make him feel the people aren’t laughing at him as he says something on the computer
I would make him not feel That something bad will happen when he does something artistic because art therapy is great
I would make him feel that the liberal party won’t play with the phones when we are talking
I would make him enjoy the lifestyle he likes to do
I would make him not believe it would be cool if everyone likes the same thing, we need everyone to be different
I would invent a happy pill to make him
Not have all this
So he won’t feel like swimming in batehaven to the deep water so he will drown
I want to help him make him positive
But it is hard

I heard about a man who has an illness and Has a notion to stop taking
His medication
Which is wrong
Very very wrong
Even if it stops you from being cool
Just write the stuff out of you
And then you can choose
If you want to post it or not
But when I went to the psych ward
I was believed I wasn’t taking my medication
And people were so worried
I had to have tribunal hearings about
Once a month
And when I was told that I don’t need
That anymore I made a pact to myself
To always take my medication
Even if it makes me uncool
I was so worried that I bought
Four more when I had four there
Because of the coronavirus
But when I heard of a man who
Said he had a Bomb strapped to himself which he didn’t really
But he should take his medication
Even if it takes your mojo or reputation away
Just write it out of you
You might not want to but
Those people who say that
Often end up locked up
After getting in trouble
Just stop trying to so called protect your reputation
Because I feel better writing all the stuff out of me
If you feel good you could use another name of someone you don’t know or doesn’t exist in your support group
Too many people want to be cool and by doing that they do things that are uncool because they stop taking medication when they need it
You have to be good
Because getting arrested the police
Isn’t cool
And if you break the law
You should go to gaol or the psych ward
To avoid breaking the law
Write the evil out of you in a story
This piece does exactly that for me

JANUARY, THE TIME OF YEARS OF ASH, BASH THE BALL, AND NET COURTS






YA SEE EVERY TIME JANUARY COMES,, WE GET MIXED MESSAGES

THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE BASHING PEOPLE UP

AND THERE IS ALWAYS A LOT OF ASH WHERE BUSHFIRES MUST BE

YA SEE BUSHFIRES ARE ALWAYS IN JANUARY, BECAUSE IT’S SO ****** **** HOT

AND THE CRICKET, WELL THE AUSSIES ARE WINNING

AND INDIA, ARE DEFINATELY NOT

YA SEE MEN HAVE THEIR BEERS IN THE ESKY, OH ****** BETCHA DO

AND LLEYTON HEWIT LOST YESTERDAY, BOO HOO BOO HOO BOO HOO

I DID A RAIN DANCE, WHICH BROUGHT A THUNDERSTORM TO ADELAIDE

I HOPE, A LOT OF YOU DUDES, THINK OF HOLDING COOL STUFF

TO RAISE THE AMOUNT OF MONEY NEEDED

YA SEE, I AM WILLING TO ATTEND ANY EVENT NEAR ME, AND GIVE DONATIONS

OH YEAH, THAT IS SO COOL

YOU SEE, DUDES, I WAS YOUR SAVIOUR, CRONUS DID IT AGAIN

FORCED, THE FIRE TO GET UNDER CONTROL

THANKS FOR MY LITTLE RAIN DANCE


UMMMMMMMM IT WILL RAIN UMMMMMM IT DID RAIN, UMMMMMM I AM GLAD MY COSMOS OPLAN WORKED

UMMMMMMM THEY NEED $13,000,000, PLEASE DONATE UMMMMMM PLEASE DONATE

OR HOLD VARIOUS SOCIAL GATHERINGS IN YOUR AREA, PLEASE GIVE GENENEROUSLY

I HELPED A POOR MAN WHO WAS SLEEPING ON THE CEMENT IN THE CANBERRA CBD

ASND HE WAS ASLEEP, SO I THREW $2 HIS WAY, FOR A DRINK OR FRUIT OR WHATEVER HE WANTED

I WANT TO BUILD A HOMELESS HOTEL, I CAN’T HELP IT, I FEEL SORRY FOR PEOPLE LIKE HIM

I GIVE MONEY, WHEN I CAN I STRESS WHEN I CAN, TO POOR PEOPLE

SO THEY CAN HAVE A LIFE TOO, BUT I STRESS, WHEN I CAN, I DON’T WANT TO BE AN EAST TARGET

WE ALWAYS HAVE BUSH FIRES IN JANURAY, I AM GLAD I DID THAT RAIN DANCE TO HELP

NOW, I KNOW, THERE MIGHT BE TROUBLES, BUT MY MATE STEVE SAID TO ME, **** HAPPENS

I MEAN THIS IN THE NICEST POSSIBLE WAY

I AM CRONUS, BUT I AM HUMAN, I CAN’T SAVE EVERYONE RELIGIOUSLY, BUT YA CAN ****** WELL TRY

CAUSE HELPING PEOPLE, HELPS THE FUTURE GET BRIGHT, YOU HAVE TO WEAR SHADES

I STUDIED MESSIAH SCIENCE, AND I LIKED THOSE CLASSES

I WAS A BIG FAT MAN WHO WORE GLASSES

WE WATCHED NEWS, BUT ONLY WIN

AND STAND UP COMEDY, AND BECKER AND FOOTY AND HEAPS OF OTHER COOL THINGS

HE TAUGHT ME A LOT ABOUT BEING TREATED LIKE A PERSON

AND I COOKED DINNER, LIKE A PERSON

YA SEE I STUDIED MESSIAH SCIENCE, I LOVED THOSE CLASSES

I KNOW FROM THAT, I LEARNT HOW TO REALLY HELP THE POOR, AND UNDERSTAND

THEY NEED MORE C ARE, OH DEARY ME, WHAT AN ACTORS LIFE FOR ME

I WILL BRING THE NEW YEAR TIGER INTO TELEVISION

HE’S ON AAA YOUTUBE TV AND AARON CLAYTON

YEAH. AUSTRALIA LOOKS SET TO WIN CRICKET, TENNIS IS NOT AS PROMISING FOR THE AUSSIES

AND I DID A BUDDHIST RAIN DANCE, TO CALM THE SA BUSHFIRES

I AM RADICALLY AWESOME, DUDES

Oh darling I am free
Oh darling I am Croix Rey
Finally I am out of hospital
Despite my brothers still
Being there
Oh darling mighty me
I get to be with my mummy and daddy
Waiting to hopefully see
My new brothers slowly following me
Oh darling the only healthy one
I remember my garbage bag pants
Oh darling I am having fun
Finally home with my parents
Oh darling Out of hospital
Oh darling let me pray
For ezrah and daxon to come out soon
Oh darling let them out
Oh darling oh darling
Pray for my brothers to be free
Oh darling I am glad I am out
Hopefully darling my brothers
Follow soon

santa claus is captured  in the psych ward



it is the year 2015 and ron was decorating the HDU with christmas decorations

and while he was doing that, 67 year old billy thomson got dressed up as santa and

went around giving lollies to the children of the land and one mother complained and

said, this man has no right to hand lollies to the children without a permit and billy said

why don’t you get ******,you see i am the feral santa and i lived on the north pole before

the blizzard that wiped out all the north pole, and there is still a north pole but it is trapped

in children’s imaginations never to be seen again, and i who put my good name on this town

decided to free the north pole and this mother left and called the police on her cellphone

and in about 50 minutes the police arrested billy and took him to ron’s HDU, and billy said

i am santa claus and if i stay here i can’t free the north pole, i am a nice person, and i don’t deserve

to be in a place like this, and jesus claus went up to billy and said, your not the real santa, and billy

swore at jesus and said, your mother is the only one who thinks you are special, your about as special

as a hole in your heart and jesus swore at billy and suddenly a fist fight broke out and billy said, mate

i am the real santa and you are my son, but the blizzard stopped you from being the real santa

so, i made you stuck in people’s imagination and ron took billy aside and said what is on your mind, and billy said

i lost my job at the factory and then i got a calling from the almighty one to spread christmas cheer all over the land

and i did that by giving lollies to children yelling ** ** ** MERRY CHRISTMAS, and ron said, ok, you do know it’s 2015

and it’s not appropriate to do that and then billy said, you see i believe that if i can start a santa claus website, where

we can play christmas carols and kids order their presents, we can take the myth of santa out of kids imaginations and

into the real world and then ron asked, are you going to charge a fee and billy said, we don’t need a fee and jesus claus came up

to billy and said, you can’t get santa through the computers, it’s too early to do that without a fee and billy said, why don’t you

just get ****** and ron gave billy risperidal  and seroquel, to settle his delusional santa claus mind, and jesus was walking around the

psych ward i am killing off santa and billy walked around the ward saying, i am going to give jesus a lump of coal, which made the nurses

come out and try and settle them down but that was difficult so ron decorated  the psych ward and billy started yelling ATHENA BROUGHT

THE BLIZZARD THAT DESTROYED THE NORTH POLE, ATHENA BROUGHT THE BLIZZARD THAT DESTROYED THE NORTH POLE

and jesus claus yelled THERE WAS NO NORTH POLE, NO PREVIOUS EXISTENCE, WE WERE THE FIRST PEOPLE ON EARTH

then billy yelled, WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKEN WAR, OK, I WAS THE REAL SANTA, and jesus said OK, AND *******, and went back to his room

and billy went to his bedroom to have a lie down, and get the presents ready for christmas and then lunch was ready and ron woke up

billy and billy said, i am helping my elves prepare the presents for christmas and ron thinking he was loopy said, even santa needs to have lunch

and ron bought billy to the table, and the meal was lesagne and salad and chocolate mousse and then ron bought jesus his lunch as well and after lunch

there was a christmas special of yelling, billy and jesus said jingle bells jingle bells jingle and root the chick, and billy said, oh what fun it is to say

leave and never come back, and jesus sang, dashing through the psych ward yelling out our stuff,trying to point out to the staff that these side effects are

wrong, you see we need settling down, so take our drugs away, and please allow us to be the psych ward santa, that’ll be so cool and then as billy sang jingle bells

jesus said *******, I AM SO TIRED and billy watched the nurses work, discovering the naughty and nice, but to not blow his cover billy asked, can i get a pass out

so i can buy some egg nog, i will not be buying brandy and the nurses said, sorry but you are too sick for pass outs and billy through his boot at the door and shattered

the glass and the nurses gave billy some ****** to settle him down and billy went off to his bed and jesus came out and bashed his hand on billy’s door and yelled

YOU LITTLE ****, THERE WASN’T EVER A NORTH POLE and ron brought out the dinners and this time jesus and billy ate their dinners in their room and

in about 1 hour and a half, ron brought out the medications and after that the clocked off and bought wok it up and went home to lose himself in the televised

carols by candlelight from the sidney meyer music bowl hosted by david and lisa and back at the HDU, jesus was watching the carols and so was billy

and every child was happy it seemed receiving presents, but ron still had to play atheist with billy and tom, because for the simple reason, they are going about their santa

duties the wrong way.

jingle splat, christmas song



jingle splat jingle splat

splatting all the day

falling on a nice cream pie

cheering all the way

jingle splat jingle splat

cheering for the mob

oh yeah, the big party dude

splatting all day long

you see on christmas eve

2 fat people have a dance

lifting up their body yeah

just to go splat on the floor

then they got right up

after 5 minutes on the ground

and then some cruel teasers said

they were the fattest people in town

ya see we go jiggle splat jingle splat

all over the dance floor, yeah

ya see we wanted to be thin my friend

but the forces of evilly made us fat

a day or 2 ago

we drank 2 bottles of egg nog oh yeah

and we got as drunk as skunks

and boy, our bellies were growing a lot

and we could hardly  see our toes

as we ate the christmas cake

and then 2 ladies walked right past them

and they were as skinny as a rake

we go jingle splat jingle splat

all over the ****** floor

but we were so ****** fat

we could hardly fit through the door

jingle splat jingle splat

christmas day is near

this is the day, we splat around ya know

eating fatty food all the day

Stop making me jitter
Stop pushing me up to clean my house
I have a cleaner
And I like sport
I want to watch the baseball and cricket and do my tapestry
I am not like ******* Lyle
I am like myself
You see it is fun watching
Canberra leading the bite
But for how long
And the big Melbourne derby
200 run chase is pretty cool
I am not a hooligan
I am a fun loving guy
Who loves every aspect of my life
I know I am a big guy
But I need to get rid of my
Stress
You see I try to be a low stressed individual
And I try to have as much fun
As I can do

Joe Biden
Thank you for electing me your president
Donald trump
Thank you for giving me the golf course
Joe Biden
I will help America get you through this pandemic
Donald trump
I don’t care as long as I can play golf
Joe Biden
I will support Obama care like what used to happen
Donald trump
Playing golf helps me
Joe Biden
I will support the United States of America
Donald trump
As long as I play golf I will be supported
Donald trump
Who cares I don’t want to concede defeat
I prefer to play golf
Just play golf
Fake news as won

Beck and Johnny went to work in the same place and they did the same line of work which was cleaning Johnny was signed up to do the toilets but beck was really confused of what he was assigned to and had to always get reminded by the boss
Beck was cleaning every toilet thoroughly and then Johnny was there in the toilet of the cafeteria where him and beck had a big fight
Because both of them claimed they were assigned to this job but beck wanted to do it because he was better at it so Johnny left and as he walked toward the pool bar, the boss said clean this bar and clean the tables and put the chairs on tables and sweep and mop the floors and then put the chairs back on the floor and when you are finished come and see me and I will assign you your roster for each day so you and beck don’t do the same job and Johnny said aren’t you thinking of me doing a good job and the boss said no but beck is doing brilliantly and you are running around doing a half *** job
You will get sacked if you don’t get your priorities right mate and Johnny argued with the boss saying every time I ask you what I do you say just check what needs to be cleaned so I do and you still complain
If you sack me I will soo you and the boss, very worried about being sooed said ok, I will give you a list of duties every morning but I am busy, so you can’t ask me any questions but Johnny said no I need to know what I need to do and I need to ask you if I’m not sure and the boss said you are skating on very thin ice with this job
You might be sacked if you don’t do your work and if I see you trying to do beck’s work, I will sack you on the spot and Johnny left and came back the next day and got his duty list and did his duties but still ran into beck and the boss said you ain’t supposed to be here and Johnny said I finished here so I am helping beck and the boss said clean the bar and the pool
And clean each table so I can see my face and then go outside to sweep the driveway and do it thoroughly like beck does and at the end of the day
Johnny went to clock off and the boss said, your jobs are poorly done so you are fired, and that means I have to find someone new to replace you
And then beck came up and the boss congratulated him for such a great job he did and he promoted him to work in the rooms with the girls and Johnny was unemployed very jealous of beck who was way ahead of him in work, even if he was lazy at school and Johnny did way more work
Well, that just means being lazy is the answer to find harder workers in you

Johnny brown is captured in the psych ward


You see with the cannula stuck in Johnny’s arm he started to hear voices from his crazy head and David and raeleen sent him to Ron so he can be able to help him and they weighed him and
Tried to give him medication and Johnny replied, I don’t want any of your fucken medication it is causing really bad side effects and Ron said Johnny, you need this because your mind hasn’t been better since we inserted the cannula into your arm and it made your arm swell up, I understand your frustration and you need to go on abilify to calm yourself down and Johnny said I am not sick well I am but not mentally it is physical and the doctors put the cannula in my arm my arms swell up and you guys are saying that I have a mental problem when it is your own fucken fault and you are going to give me a shot of a psychotic medication which will not cure me instead of a antibiotic to help relieve the swelling
So, Ron if you are a psychiatrist ******* and send me back to the fucken doctors because these aren’t a mental illness it is my fucken arm which you quacks caused by sticking a fucken cannula in my arm
And Ron said there is nothing I can do, the doctors said you need a mental health assessment and Johnny said if you give me psychotic medication I won’t take it
This is your way of saying your not negligent and you fucken are, Ron said ok I will give you a brain scan to see if there is anything there, because if there isn’t anything there, I don’t Know I just don’t like your ***** mouth, Johnny said I was meeting my son at the club for a beer to celebrate getting out and you guys are sticking me in here because of a bit of ***** mouth, Ron asked are you hearing voices and Johnny said my voices are saying get me the **** out of here and send me back to the fucken ward
I am not fucken crazy like I have no idea of killing a woman and putting her head in my fridge and Ron said, let’s talk about that then and Johnny said I am not going to do that, Ron said why say it if you are not mentally ill and I won’t stab a gay man in the chest ******* think I am crazy
You guys should see a psychiatrist for sticking a cannula in my arm and forcing
A bit of swelling
I will soo you ya ****
Ron put Johnny in isolation to calm him down and force fed psychotic medication into him, mind you this put Johnny right to sleep

Johnny Warren after life all-stars v the Saturn stringers




Johnny warren got together an after life soccer team with players like Don Bradman, as well as 2Pac, and even Christopher Reeve, also Elvis Presley, and Paul Berenyi, and Brett Eggins, we're all fired up to give Saturn a total soccer makeover, Johnny Warren alan picked Scott McDonald as well as Billy Thorpe and Tony Campbell and Saturn was a team who had some very good names as well, who are John FKennedy, Robert Kennedy as well as Martin Luther King, Walter Burley Griffin who has lived on Saturn since 1980, earth time, and never wanting to go , because Saturn has really nice homes where he can be a good athlete, also Jack Dyer and Tony Grieg and Chris Mainwaring made up the numbers.
So the game started and Johnny Warren started the play, passing it to Christopher Reeve, who is trying to bring Superman in with a really beautiful kick up the centre which is blocked by Martin Luther king, who passes it to burley Griffin who stops to look down on earth, to hear what a stupid professor is trying to say he'd like, and used his powers with a kick which made the goal, to put Saturn in the lead 1-0, the kick off came and Johnny Warren gave a big kick up which was intercepted by Jack Dyer, who dribbled it up the field, trying to stop the interception, by the other players, and then after that he passed it to Martin Luther king, who began to dribble it down a few more times, and nearly got a goal, but he missed,and the ball was intercepted by 2Pac, who ran right to the other side and kicked it in the goal, and it was counted, and that made the score 1-1, and 2Pac very happy and went to the crowd, and said, me and Johnny W, go back a long way, in afterlife sports.
The kick off happened as Martin Luther king kicked the ball over to John F Kennedy, who dribbled it further down the field, and dodged so many of Johnny Warren all star players, and finally passed it and the Johnny Warren Allstars intercepted it and John F Kennedy tried to block 2Pac the whole way, and he did and then John F Kennedy passed it to brother Robert and Robert ran down to the other side, dribbling the ball as he goes, but Billy Thorpe, intercepted it and ran down to the other side, with the ball and passed the ball to Johnny Warren who missed from right in front, and suddenly Walter Burley Griffin got the ball and dribbled it down to the other end, and yes, he kicked but it was saved very nicely by the Johnny Warren All stars goalkeeper, yes, this game was looking very good, you see these are only 1 half games,,because Johnny Warren wanted it that way, as Paul Berenyi ran it to the half way line and passed it to Brett Eggins who ran it down and as soon as he got to the goal line, he passed it to Johnny Warren who snuck it in to 2Pac who scored the Johnny Warren all stars second, and that made the score 2-1, with 2 minutes to go in the match, and the reason why there is no half time, because the players are the undead, and they don't need to break cause they can no longer be killed,
And Martin Luther king ran it down and flicked it across to John F Kennedy who passed it to Johnny Warren who was so excited he booted the ball all the way to the other side, and 2Pac knocked it in, to make the score 3-1, yes and this was really exciting for Johnny Warren and then Margaret Thatcher came into the field and Paul Berenyi booted the ball so hard, It hit Margaret thatcher right in the noggin,,and despite trying very hard to hurt her, she can't be hurt, but people can try to hurt her if they want to, and then Margaret Thatcher, left, saying I want that Paul Berenyi in Mercury, and then Martin Luther King scores a goal and at the end of the match, the score was, 3-2 to Johnny Warren all stars, and Johnny Warren sat down and had a talk with Paul Berenyi, and Paul said it's the after life coach, she can't be hurt, but Johnny, said I know, but we need to be nice to one another, or you Paul Berenyi will be locked in Mercury for all eternity, and Paul said he'll behave, and was let off with a warning.

it is a jolly old christmas for all


come on young dudes

bring on the reigns

pull the horses with mistletoe chains

put antlers on their head

and a red nose on one

and ran around town delivering presents

to all the children

a toy truck for bobby

a doll for mary jane

a train set for billy

yeah that is fine

then the choir in the streets

started singing ‘away in a manger’

as we protect the little ones from strangers

tis the season to be jolly

fa la la la la la la la la

the christmas pudding is ready to be eaten

they eat it after they go home from the baseball

after our team copped a beating

we wish you a merry christmas

we wish you a merry christmas

we wish you a merry christmas

from our dear cousin Sal

and everyone at the party

is celebrating with wine and beer

and we drink our fruit punches

and squirt them on everyone

and then i say, i am a happy dude

and i am a party dude

that parties all through the day and night

and little billy bob is a bit of a rebel

who really wants to start a fight

you see the only way you can stop him fighting’s

is say, you haven’t got the right to fight, ok, yo the party is on

and we open a great big can of coke and say

merry christmas dudes

You see way back in the 80s yeah
I was having a lot of fun
I used to tease the girls
And muck with all the boys
Everyone wanted to be my friend
I was enjoying every day life
Drinking a lot of coke
But everyone thought I was a bit different man
But I said I was just a kid
Just a kid
Just a kid
I was to everyone just a kid
I used to tease my friends
And make them feel stressed
Yeah I was just a little kid
I used to tease my friends
Right till the end
I was just a little kid
When I turned 18 man
I became a man
But my problems were starting yeseree
I was getting fought and bashed and mugged
In the back I wanted to be a kid
Be a kid
Just a kid
I want to tease my friends
Right till the end
I was just a little kid
Even as an adult I was a kid
Just a kid
I used to tease my friends right till the end
I was just a little kid
Just a kid dudes

hi dudes and past livers


i can’t go to the carols in the domain because of some stupid reason

because of what i did which is in the past, and i am not planning to be a terrorist

or anything, i am just going to wave my candle and enjoy it, and i have every right to do that

youtube has changed now, and it takes a long time to upload stuff on youtube, so i don’t do it

i really think that people are living in the past with me, and that drives me crazy, i don’t want to be a terrorist

and anyone who calls me a terrorist, please don’t, i haven’t been plotting to **** people, in  fact i am a nice person

i have every right to wave my candle and sing the carols, WHY CAN’T PEOPLE EXCEPT THIS

i am not a hooligan, i am a family person, i go to the carols with family and enjoy, but this country

is a pack of past livers who don’t care about family people like me

you see, what i can’t except, is why can’t you just say stop emailing rather than leading me on

i am not going to the domain concert, it’s better to watch that on TV or youtube anyway

but you have no right to kick me out of the stage “88 carols because you are reading the stories

and judging me, i am not a terrorist, i am a fun loving guy, who loves to wave the candle and sing carols

and i deserve to be treated with respect, for christs sake, it’s a free event, and i am not causing problems for anyone

i will promise not to take videos of kids, i will just listen to the carols, i really think what i write has nothing to do me being bad

i am just writing stuff out of me, i think the conservos in sydney are a bunch of idiots, who just want to judge the poor people like me

i think they are gutless too because they pick on me at my venerable stages of my life, when all i want is enjoy these events and have fun

in my defense, i never knew i was filming a girl till someone pointed it out to me, and i didn’t put that on youtube because she looked like

she was worried, see i have a heart and i have a soul, i believe in buddhism but i love to wave my candle at carol events, other people take videos

so why pick on me, especially when i know that singing carols and waving the candle is all i want to do, just tell me not to take videos or photos

rather than kick me out of an event for what is said online, i was feeling great yesterday as i sang my christmas carols into photo booth instead of

youtube, so i don’t get any copyright infringements, i am a person, and not an animal, ok, i deserve respect, dudes

i prefer to be treated like just another family person going to the carols to enjoy the music, rather than being chucked out for what i say online

yeah, i feel great singing christmas carols at the carols by candlelight, and i enjoy it, i realise my poems might not be christian enough but

that is because nobody is giving me a go to read stories, stephen king writes evil stories, should he get banned from the carols, probably not

but either should i, i am causing no problems at the carols, so give me a break ok

Concert on Jupiter


Hi dudes and welcome to my concert on Jupiter my first song is summer weather

Ya know it's the summer weather
The BBQ is lit together
The kids are swimming in the sea up and down avoiding sharks
It was the summer weather
Everyone having fun yeah
You see it is the summer weather
And I got my beer to keep me cool
Summer weather
Prepare a nice salad
With lettuce and tomato
And egg and potato
Summer weather
Johnny is jumping in the ocean
From his surfboard into the waves saying he is cool isn't he
Summer weather
The BBQ is lit together
The kids are swimming in the ocean up and down avoiding the sharks
Summer weather
I think the bush fire warning tells them that they must turn the BBQ off because it is
A total fire ban
Summer weather
So we have to think about something else yeah
Like potato salad and tomato and lettuce and a nice Aussie pav
Summer weather
Put the tv on to watch the cricket
To see which team wins the big bash and also see if Australia wins
Summer weather
Go for a yacht  ride on the ocean
A nice pleasurable ride through the waves having fun saying summer definitely rules
It is the summer weather
Cause we have our beer
To keep us cool

Ok here is summer wonderland

Sausages cooking on the barbe
Beer is chilling in the esky
Mum is in the kitchen making the pav enjoying this summer wonderland
Opening presents full of absolute joy
Presents for the girls and the boys
They love it yeah dad likes his beer living in the summer wonderland
On the beach we can build a sand castle and we bury uncle Robbie in the sand
And dad comes out and said hey you bludgers
Give your ****** mother a ****** hand
You see the beer is getting colder as you are getting older
Everyone is saying that we all live and breath in a mighty summer wonderland
You see I drink those beers in the esky
And the flies are a bit pesty
Buzzing around annoying you
Living in a summer wonderland
On the beach we can build a sandcastle and bury uncle Robbie in the sand
Then dad came our saying
Hey you bludgers
Give your ****** mother
A ****** hand
Living strong living long
Living in a hot old land
Walking along sweating so strong living in a summer wonderland

My next song is god bless the merry Tele marketers

God bless the merry Tele marketers I have something to say
Why do you ring me up and express ******* in that way
First of all you don't talk and I feel like hanging up
And other times you say that
People are trying to hack into my computer making me scared to hang up
I know if you hang up they will probably ring again
I wish they will stop calling me
Making me feel like a 10 below 10
I don't believe you have to ring me up every single night
I would prefer to watch a really great YouTube fight
I would like to tell you that you are fucken ****
I know that because of the advice from my mum
I think it sounds like the government trying to hack into the phone and say
If you vote for me in the next election I will give you higher pay
But instead I get people saying
People are hacking into my internet and they make you feel like saying want a ****** bet
God bless you stupid telemarketers I have something to say
You see sometimes you say you Jehovah's Witness saying Jesus was born on Christmas Day
You hang up saying don't call
Me a fucken gain
You see I believe in things
And so should you
You are just a naughty naughty
Really really rude dude
God bless telemarketers
Please stop bugging me mate

The next song is tony Abbott is a *******

Tony Abbott is a *******
A ******* a *******
Tony Abbott is a *******
A big big *******
You see he will ***** the poor and treat us like paupers
And take away our pensions
Like a crazy *******
You see he said he has the power to take away our money
And there is no way we will
Ever get a million
Because Abbott cares about
Is his pocket oh yeah
Tony Abbott is a **** face
A **** face a **** face
Tony Abbott is a **** face
And I hate him oh yeah
You see tony will give me a drink which will be total poison
And when we complain
He will say **** the poor
Tony Abbott is a **** face
A **** face a **** face
Yeah he is a **** face
A real fucken **** face

i don’t really want a body guard

no, man, not for me

because i am a nice person, dude

and i don’t need no police and the security guards

i hate being some dude that needs a body guard

because i hear voices saying, i am not your bodyguard, buddy

i don’t want to have a bodyguard

i am too cool for that

it’s nice how the police can protect you

but i hate the idea of bodyguards

you see when i was young i hung around the people

ya know, i want to really love life

you see if i have a bodyguard, i could end up in more danger than what i bargain for

you see while i watch prisoner i learn it is ****** hard to be a bodyguard

a lot of ****** work, but you see the bent screws like the freak ferguson

and **** stewart and stewart gillespie from prisoner abusing their fucken power

i hate the idea of having a bodyguard it will make me feel stupid

and i can tell you guys, i ain’t stupid no fear

i don’t want a bodyguard because they can’t be perfect oh no

because i don’t want people fussing over me, like i am a fresh piece of meat

you see i am an artist and writer and i perform on youtube

and i hate the idea of a stupid bodyguard coming in on me

Katie the previous lives lady Katie meets the messiah



Katie loves to help people find out who they were in their previous lives, but she
Had finally met her match when she began seeing 18 year old Bradley Parker who
Went to her mainly just to talk to her and try and be a friend to someone, and every day
He spoke to Bradley, he would say that he is the Jewish Messiah and when God calls him
He will go to Isreal to build a temple and create peace, and God will choose who will live and who will die, and Katie didn't quite know what to make of this, she tried to say how do you think you will accomplish this, and Bradley said that when God delivers the message for him to go to Isreal and build this temple, the Jews are going to pay his airfares, and they will all chant the messiah is here, we must let him be the one to die for us, Katie said about when will God call you, have you an estimate, and Bradley said, no one knows exactly when it will happen but when it does, it will mark the end of war forever, and anyone who ****** the messiah, me off will be killed and blasted down to hell.
Katie asked Bradley is there anything on earth that you need to accomplish so God can know it is you that he wants and Bradley said, I am the messiah, you see when I was 10 god sewed my ***** together so I can't **** girls, in the future, and yes there are a few things I need to do and that is that I need to keep right wing parties from running the country that I live in, and I do that by watching channels with no rich ****** looking smug, and I need to speak to a rabbi, so I can ask him exactly what is Gods plan for me.
While waiting for all this to happen, Bradley became very negative, and decided to go out and abuse the country folk of which he lives in, he will do that by stopping cars and knocking people forward, but he will mainly target public service people, and he left poor people alone.
Katie looked and looked at the lives of people who say these kind of things to people, and apart from bible characters, there was no one and she thought that this mind is an over active imagination, and maybe Bradley's previous life was a sign of a old famous singer, movie star, and then Elvis came to mind when Bradley kept on saying negative things about people who hate celebrities, and that gave Katie the vibe that maybe Bradley was Elvis and all the drugs and all the problems of dying from drugs, makes his mind think that he is the messiah and Katie told Brad that and he yelled and cursed, being so rude, saying he doesn't believe in previous lives, he said I told you I believe I am the Jewish messiah and I will die in Isreal, but I might keep you alive, and Katie who still believed he was Elvis Presley, sat there pretending to agree with what he says, and she pushed herself down, so she won't be killed, because to Katie, Bradley was a believer in the end of the world, and she is a more positive person, who thinks that talking about who you were in a previous life, and having a laugh and maybe arranging with people to make amends with people from their past lives, but they will do it in a way, that it is just words, and they become just friends, but if they become an attraction to each other, well, if they're happy, they should go ahead and do it,
But Katie didn't know what to say to Bradley, because she ain't a therapist, she has been employed to tell about past lives, she tells Bradley 1 hundred times he is Elvis, but Bradley will keep saying he's the messiah who is frustrated because God hasn't freed him from this awful world yet, day in and day out this will happen untill Katie said, I told you your previous life, and you say you don't believe in previous lives, what do you want with me, and Bradley stormed out and every day since then, kept coming into Katie's office because he was having a hard life and needed to speak to someone, and Katie was the only one who actually listened to him, and Katie said to Brad, I can meet you for coffee every Tuesday, but really this office is just for people seeking past life information, and Bradley said thanks to Katie for her help and every Tuesday they met to have coffee where Bradley told her all his problems within this country and how his belief can stop this and Katie just listened, though she still had her belief that Bradley was Elvis in his past life, but she never let that slip anymore, but after 4 months of doing that, Bradley thanked Katie for her support and they both went their seperate ways to work through their seperate beliefs, and Katie still believed he is Elvis, but she kept that under her hat, and focused on people who are actually interested, with no preaching.

Katie the previous lives lady tries to rescue her nephew



Katie's nephew Jackson Gooden is in town to spend some time with Katie and it couldn't have come at a worst time, you see the kidnapper who kidnapped Graham Thorne, well his reincarnation was in town and he was getting a messed up head with everyone telling him he was mentally deranged, the only one who helped him was Katie, and when Katie took time off to look after her nephew when he's in town, he almost flipped his marbles untill he decided to prove to everyone else that he is Steven Bradley and use Katie as a blackmail target, you see what he plans to do is kidnap Katie's 15 year ok'd nephew Jackson and blackmail Katie,if she refuses to see him, the weight will fall on her nephews head and **** him, yes this is the way for Katie to make sure she makes me happy.
Katie begged for him to let him go, and then say you will be a pig in your next life, what you do here affects your future happiness, let my nephew go and we'll talk about treatment for your illness, and he said that he thought she'd understood him, but really she is just like the other's, and Katie had to keep telling him that he is good and will never stray, and she did that because her patient had a pocket knife at her nephews head, and Katie said, I believe this is the wrong way to handle your illness,,I told you that you kidnapped a kid, and seconds later you have my 15 year old nephew at knifepoint, you are
******* up, and also you are making a mockery of my good business, he just laughed still determined he'll **** him
And make Katie jitter.
Jackson tried to scream, so the knife would be removed from his neck, and Katie said, I will find a way that this man can't ever harm you,,you have to refuse to go anywhere with him, he had a weakness, and that is, if you laugh at him, he'll suddenly be scared of him, and Katie then said that she doesn't believe in laughing in her job, but she decided to make a exception here, because really she wanted time off with Jackson.
The reincarnation of Steven Bradley said that he will hold Jackson and Katie for a huge ransom and Jackson said, you can't get me, I am too smart, you see i am young, you are old
I'm a young dude, your an old fogie, i'm a young dude, your an old fogie, I'm a young dude, your an old fogie, a stinken little old fogie ma--n.
And then he ran and Jackson said 1 win for young against old, and then Jackson and Katie spent time sightseeing for 4 days and Katie, I know she is born to tell people previous lives stories, really enjoyed being away from the office and when she came back,,the first phone call made was a phone call to the cops, issueing a restraining order on that Steven Bradley reincarnation, and then Jacksoc went back to his parents house saying he was kidnapped by a ghost while Katie tried a new approach to tell people previous lives, so she can keep love one's safe for the future of her business, yes that's what she'll do.

Katie the previous lives lady the world war 2 reincarnation



Katie was busy researching the world war 2 deaths, to find a Gordon Micheals, to
Answer some questions about Danny Reuben who constantly talking about world war 2 as if the fighters were total losers, who are just there to fight and not fight for peace, and Danny kept yelling at Katie to get her to find out why he has these thoughts, and Katie said I have been searching the web and I had this soldier from world war 2, who was Gordon Micheals, who actually did fight to protect his country, but then some Americans came up to him and blastered his head off, he died instantly and  then Katie asked for his date of birth, to make sure that he is Gordon, Danny said it was 22 April 1951 and then Danny asked why do you ask that, and Katie said I hope that you know, yes I am a trained psychiatrist, and if you don't feel comfortable marking your moods on previous lives I can be a regular psychiatrist, but I am a psychiatrist that believes that paychiatric disorders are problems with aura of previous lives, and I have fixed many people with these beliefs, they might not have believed in what I believe in ,but o did cure him, I can do normal psychiatrist business too, you know I listen and tell you what med to take, and I will see you next week, that works, cause I ain't a preacher, but previous lives is my belief, and really it does explain, your hatred of world war 2,
Danny said to Katie, if telling me my previous life helps get this illness out of me, I will talk, but I ain't sure what I believe in, though.
Katie explained to Danny that when he says he will hire a nuclear bomb and drop it on the English speaking countries, and kaboom, there all gone, and Katie said Gordon loved nuclear weapons, you see he wanted to start a nuclear power plant in Texas, but they said that nuclear is evil, and Gordon started to panic a bit, but then he joined the army, now I ain't going to preach, but if you find you have to meet his family, I can organise thatm mainly because it might make you feel better knowing his family is alright.
Danny said, yes I should do that, after I drop a nuclear bomb on Turkey, I hate that country, and Katie said no you don't, there is no need to start talking like that, but Danny kept on talking like that, driving Katie mad,but she had to be professional and say that Gordon actually has a nuclear plant named after him, are you interested in going, and Danny said, well, only if I could drop a bomb on New York, maybe anytime in the next 4 years, and Katie told Dannu that he doesn't mean that, while Danny said, yeah I did, cause New York needs a good bombing all over the state and Katie said we are getting nowhere, Danny, you sharent mean that, because why else would you come here.
Danny told his mum that he'll get help, because his behavior his horrible, but then he said he likes Katie and wants to break the rules with her, and they can both plan to drop bombs on the USA, and other English speaking world countries, and Katie told Danny that unless he plans to think about being Gordon, there isn't really much to say to each other, Danny went off in a huff, but returned to say a few words with Katie determined to beat his head being messed, but the sessions went just for 15 minutes, he still said he wants to blow up the English speaking world countries, but put that as Gordon Micheals revenge on the English speaking world, and Katie said that makes sense and continued to council him till he didn't need his help anymore, and it took 6 months, now Danny works as a Boss of a large Hotel chain,and Katie was happy to help with finding Danny's previous life issue, she can't wait for the next patient.

The people of Canberra, yes they love it, oh yeah

you see I come here after getting ribbed by *******
And teased by so called friends
When all I wanted was to be treated like a Normy
And, yes I did normal things, like watch footy and exercise
And I also ran around town trying to enjoy being a kid
Yes, I was made to be such an *******, I hated it
Me and my brother played cricket in the park
And these two dudes tried to scare us off
I am too fit for them, but I found one city
Was nothing like that, yes the Canberra crowd were nice to me
The first word a kid I hardly knew said to me, was your like us, man
Because he thought I was cool, to his point of view
And I made more school friends, and I found this so fun
Then, I made a friend who ended up going to the Raiders matches
When they started in 1982, and we had a lot of fun going to those matches
Cheering them on till their first grand final in 1987
And we continued it in 1989 and '91 and '92 and then their last premiership back in 1994, and that was the year that I went down to Mawson, where the Raiders leagues club was, and saw the team come home, and I asked my friend we support the Raiders, how about we support the Cannons, you see we play basketball, how about we watch it, the cannons are playing well, so we supported the Canberra Cannons, who were our local basketball team, yes, we saw players like Herb McEachin and Phil Smyth, and Jamie Kennedy and Andy Campbell, and my friend saw him at a course he did, and Willie Simmons, played for them, as well as the Alabama Slammer, who did a add for Captain snooze, it went, ' the Alabama slammer, through on his pygamas, lying on his bunk dreaming of the slam dunk, yes, Canberra was on the map, but like the Raiders they stopped playing really well, like finals well, and unlike the cannons are no more, but then after the Canberra Kookaburras were popular in Rugby Union in the 80s, I think the tune went like this, kookaburras play in the ACT, merry, merry, kings of the Union field was he, play kookaburras play, and we'll win the Sydney comp, well I think that is how it went, but who cares, because later on we got a stronger team , the ACT Brumbies, they were so cool, they won two cups, but this rugby comp was harder to win, and at the same time, the best Canberra team, who won the most cups, were the Canberra Capitals, who are the women's basketball team, yes, 10 out of 12 premierships, yes they are so cool, well the capitals run I think is over, and the Raiders have been doing well in the under 20s, but last year they did well and were thrashed in the grand final, Canberra looked doomed, untill something happened to Canberra in February 2013, and that was a moment that changed Canberra forever, you see I have been following tbe Major league from the USA, and I drove my friend nuts, you see the whole city of Canberra got behind the Raiders, and the cannons and the capitals and the Brumbies, the kookaburras, and we support our local Aussie rules comp, we have the best local comp in Australia, it went national, yes, that is cool, we made mistakes with the implosion of our old hospital, which killed Katie ******, and we at least haven't got a right wing government, back in the 80s, we had no government, but back to where we're at, in February 2013, Canberra changed, yes this was the time of the Canberra winning the Australian baseball Claxton shield baseball comp, from the wooden spoon, yes Canberra us great, and we are putting some great apartments up, to bring people here to live up to it's aboriginal name, meeting place, you see I met some really nice people at sporting events in Canberra, and I don't want that to change, you see Newcastle dudes don't have a good sports following like the Canberra crowd has, yes maybe they have the Jets, in soccer, and the Newcastle knights, but we have the GWS, yes they play 3 normal season matches in our city, so we are the boys in our wonderful city of Canberra, we support the AFL, and the AFL is the greatest game of all. Newcastle local sports is just Newcastle, ours include a miniature national comp, we have the Kanga cup soccer tournament, which is better than the Newcastle jets, yes we are the mighty Canberra crowd, we are making our city so proud, we have better stuff, like sports to suit all walks of life, as well as having the best flower show in the world, called Floriade, how many flower shows have people performing songs at them the way we do, and February has the Multi cultural festival, so let's celebrate the 100 years of Canberra, we ain't shy, the rest of Australia, just thinks their the best.
The end

Hey there you little ****
Don’t give me the coronavirus
You see I would hate to go back
To the days of the brontesaurus
I don’t want your fucken germs
Planted all over me
So please don’t spread this virus onto me
I would love to keep social distancing
That will make my day
But don’t you force me to sit with you
Up close, FUCKEN GERMS
I don’t want to be a germaphobe
So you have to do one thing for me
Just you fucken ****** well
Keep the coronavirus away from me
Hey there you little ****
Don’t give me the coronavirus
You see I would hate to go back
To the days of the brontesaurus
I don’t want your fucken germs
Planted all over me
So please don’t spread this virus onto me
I saw these men in the fruit shop
Touching fruit without gloves
It is enough to make your skin crawl
And not want to be real close
You see he could give me the fucken coronavirus
And mate I will be mad
Yes oh yes old sir
You guys are really bad
Hey there you little ****
Don’t give me the coronavirus
You see I would hate to go back
To the days of the brontesaurus
I don’t want your fucken germs
Planted all over me
So please don’t spread this virus
Onto me
So I go for a walk cause your allowed to yeah
Walking along happily feeling regular oh yeah
I saw a few families riding their fucken bikes
And the good thing is the social distancing is what I like
So I kept on my walk keeping away
From other people
Then this fucken idiot coughed all over me near the steeple
I go mate what the **** are you doing
He said sorry I haven’t the virus
I just feel like spewing
And I said yeah right and I said
Hey there you little ****
Don’t cough all over me
I don’t believe you haven’t got covid 19
Because you really look worst for wear so please kind sir
If you must cough do it into your arm
To keep the coronavirus away from me
Hey there you little ****
Don’t give me the coronavirus
You see I don’t want to go back to
The days of the brontesaurus
I don’t want your fucken germs all over me
Do please please please don’t spread
This virus onto me
Cause I hate it

Ken Almond loves to push people down to little young dude status




You Ken Almond was a really tough guy who loves to bully people
He loves to first of all get the kids to play cool for the family
And after that, he wants them to muck around at night with them
And Ken Almond wasn't sympatic, no he would push little cool kids down
And tell them you ain't like us, now and forever
And each kid said, I hate you, I hate you all
And also each kid also said, ****** oathe I am a boy
You see he gets these weird voices which are destroying his friendship
With people,,so what he does is tease and rib him
Like he is a real fucken crazy person
Who has a lot of ****** problems
And ken will take these kids out and give them a bit of a rib
And then hand them back to their parents
And then after that ken will play the all innocent act on them
Then each time, he sees these Kids, he will do the same
And act the same, and both be as stupid as a pack of wild boars
You see, to lure them in, he says that he is one of the young dudes
And will muck with then in little baby groups
And then when he gets with some cool people
He will rib them like nothing else, mind you, the kids ****** hate it
And then after that, Ken would take these kids home
And then play happy families with him and his folks
He will do anything to make these kids see that they aren't  ever going to be cool kids
even if he one day has to kidnap them to tease them, and make them feel fucken awful
After that Ken. Decided to head to the pub and emuck with all the men
And actually he has a great time at the club
And also after that he'll talk to a lot of adults
And ***** about them all day
Ken is having a great time teasing these kids
Then as he enjoys doing anything around the house
He treats him like a little young dude and ribs
Him away from the adult life, and into mucking with the proper adults
And Ken after that says, let's  party, like we are going to party all night
And then once he has the young dudes to stay up all night with him
He will say to them, that he is still too shy to be like us
He is still a cool kid, nothing bad will happen while you stay with us
And if you want to be like us, mate you have to prove yourself, dude
Then when his family comes over to talk with him
Ken will muck shy with him and say, I am like them you shy boy
And I am smarter than you anyday, you are still a koomarri man
And you are not a normal person man, but the little young dudes say
Yes, I am.cool, you guys and I will teaee all the babies in the street
And, then after that, Ken will say, hey
And you say straight back to him
Hey is in the paddock where the horses are
And then you will say again, hey is in the paddock where the horses are
And then you will say, hey is in the paddock where the horses are
And after that, he will say, you are cool
And don't forget what I taught ya, have a great life, dude
Ken will come back to the young dudes and sit with them
And say, get ****** buddy, get ****** buddy, get ****** buddy
And as he says it, he'll say, he'll move backwards away from him
Ken will say, hey dudes , I am so cool
And I am playing cool, and saying hey to each little young dude
Just to improve my mojo
And the young dudes say, hey is in the paddock where the horses are

captured in the psych ward, the man treating a cool kid like a man



you see today was a bad day, when ronald cumpton decided to rebel against his father

for hitting him and stuff when he was young, but the voices in his head made him act

like an old fogie, with the main voice saying, your brother, well he is a kid, you are a man

to a fight Ronald, and we don’t like you anymore and if anyone tried to protect Ronald, they will

tell his mates and brother to just be a kid, so we can bash up Ronald and treat him like a shy man

who can’t do anything, and one man called Ronald a great big ugly snout and another man bullied

Ronald so bad, he felt like being a kid and then the voice came back to his head, Ronald you are still

a man to a fight and your friends and brother are still kids, and we will keep you from being a kid, even if

we could do it religiously and this made Ronald very angry and his mates were saying we ain’t doing anything

and Ronald said someone is teasing me and when i find out the truth i will bash them senseless and the

voices made Ronald think he was a cool young dude sitting over the kids and Ronalds father said we need to

give this boy medication to Ronald  to calm him down but they weren’t really into giving him medication, and

ronald told his dad to ******* and when his father laughed at him like a kid, Ronald yelled at him like a robber

would if they were going to rob him and  this became to much for mr cumpton to understand and he called the police in

to calm him down and Ronald said, you are fucken causing my voices to be violent, and you are causing my voices

to make me look like a ****** and you are the man saying i ain’t a kid, i am a man to a fight, and i am getting fought

by every man in the mall, and i hate it, all i want to do is be a normal young dude, who parties and has a bi of fun and

you are taking it away from me and i need to yell at you and these pigs are not going to lock me away, ok, and then

the voices decided to stop, because the police took ronald to the HDU, where these voices went haywire saying you are

locked away with Ron Cooper because you are a bad boy, and then the men’s voices came into the doctor saying be like a man

and then told his mates to be kids because they haven’t put a foot wrong, and then the forces of evil started to push down on

Ronald’s knee, making it very itchy and Ron gave him some cream to put on it every day, but Ronald said, it’s not a disease it is

the force trying to get me, and i am Don Lane and I am Darly Somers and they are both men of the world and my brother is a wimpy kid

because he ran into his bedroom and i stayed there fighting my dad, and Ron gave Ronald some Largactil, like about 100mg and hopefully

this would calm the voices and say, your dad treated you like a kid he said and if he treated you like a man, he probably thought you were a

grown up and not as misbehaved as a normal kid, and Ronald said, i was getting bashed at the mall and they told the kids to be kids and said

to me not to be a kid because i am not a kid, and Ron said, ok, did you do anything to enforce this and Ronald said, well i did tease them but

i wasn’t in the mood to be a quiet family person, i wanted to be a rebel, i still do, and if i take this medication i will stop taking this medication when

i get free, because as i told my parents, there is nothing wrong with me, and i will put you up for discrimination if you keep me here any longer than

i need and Ron said is there anything that can make you take this medication, and he said, get inside my head and get the bad voices out of my head

because i was a cool kid when i was young and i think cool is the way to go, and I know i am an adult now, but i feel the medication takes my cool away

and i don’t want to take it and the men who teased m me knew i was suffering and sat there saying, ahhh you are still getting teased Ronald and Ron brought out the

inmates dinner and said to Ronald, we want you to stop hitting your parents, and we think we need to give you medication to explain those men who bullied and teased you

are just human beings, everybody is a human being and we have feelings and your starting to hurt your parents feelings when you yell at them when they are trying to help you

and Ronald noticed a knife on the table and said to Ron that he was going to **** him then and there and Ron  reached in and got the knife off Ronald and said eat your meal in you room and

then  in half an hour Ron brought his medication to him and stayed there till they take it and the men said, you just stay in there Ronald because your father mother and brother and your friends are

all kids and you are a man to a tease or fight unless you begin to behave yourself and Ronald told Ron and he said, well i don’t think you are ready to go out if you think those voices are real

because nobody is giving you an itchy leg and nobody makes you hit your father, nobody is m treating you like a fighting man, and while you still think these voices are real,

you need to be in here and we will look after you, if you want to be a kid, be a kid, but remember you probably prefer to be a fighting man, and the voices are doing that because

Ronald, you are just about as messed up as everyone here, and after saying that Ron left Ronald and clocked off and bought chinese food and went home to watch youtube

because he wanted to learn more about what was causing these crazy voices, zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz you are still getting teased Ronald heard all night and the next morning

he told Ron all about this and Ron gave him 100mg of largactil to calm them down and then he told Ronald to calm down because the nurses said you were making noise at night

and Ronald said the reason why was because i was hearing voices saying, your family are still kids and you are still a man to a fight, and then the fighting men put an itch in Ronalds leg saying

you will never be a kid, buddy, NEVER

The kidnapping of Brian Allan and Ryan Clark


You see this masked bandit was roaming around the streets of Sydney trying to catch Ryan Clark cause he had this obsession sign he surfer dude, Sam Marahall, and he pulled up on Bondi beach and grabbed Ryan Clark and tied him up and put him in the back bad then decided to go to Canberra to catch Brian Allan who tried to be like Sam in the sports boy bit, ya see Brian Allan started the phantom league and as he left this masked bandit put his hand around Brian Allan's mouth and pulled him in his can and for Brian it felt like being in the back with his brother but now he is with Ryan Clark and this masked bandit has it in his mind to lock these two boys in his bedroom as he goes our avid gets more little cool kids, so he can get rid of thst nonsense of the streets, and get the days back to the dinosaurs years, you see Ryan Clark was very scared and for the first time in his life, he showed his big muscly legs and they were ****** white and Brian Allan showed his muscle legs too and the bandit wanted to chop both these sportswatchers heads off
And he will do it now, and then Mark Marlor went past him and said, your a ******* mate, and he grabbed Mark and threw him in the bedroom as well, yes Brian and Ryan and Mark were trapped forever and ever,
And you all will never escape


Sent from my iPhone

Adults you boss around as if your colonel clink
Adults you drive us crazy every day
Adults you make us happy even if we don’t want it
And that is the way it is
Kids you rebel every day
Kids nobody knows where you are
Kids it is hard to find you in a crowd of people at a music show
Adults you pick us up when we are feeling down
Adults when we give you a smile you return with a frown
Adults you make us wear these hideous clothes that nobody wants to wear
That is not that good
Adults we only rebel when you lay down the law
Adults it is good to tease the most vulnerable
Kids you can tease but I have to ground you
Adults it really is a bad time we have
Kids if the world is rough why don’t you make it better
Instead of making write our aunt a letter
Adults I hate you because this
world seem flat when we all know it is round
Adults come on dude get a life
Kids always getting into strife
Adults bossing us around like they are right wing *****
It really drives us round the bend
Kids please don’t put your feet on the table
Adults stop telling us all about grandma Mabel
And that is the way of tgd world

Knock knock whose there
It’s your good old daddy
Who will bring you breakfast in bed
Knock knock whose there
It is your mummy dearest
With a Panadol for aching head
You see I was looking after you
Since you climbed out of mummy fast
Really mate you are smarty
Yes that makes you totally rad
Knock knock whose there
It’s your good old daddy
Giving you breakfast in bed
And because of that bad man
Your mummy dearest
With Panadol for your aching head
This is life oh yeah it is
Mummy really loves you
And oh yeah this is right
Daddy loves you too
Knock knock whose there
It’s your little sister
I will make your hair fall out
I know it is harsh but I need to
Shop and other things that might make neat
Knock knock whose there
It’s your good old daddy
Bringing you a snack in bed
Knock knock whose there
Mummy and sister waiting
For the Panadol to soothe your aching head
Then your best friend comes to stay
Understanding you have been real sick
But he didn’t care like your mummy and daddy
He just called a real ****
I bashed him up and said to him
Never come here again
I am no ****, that is you
You are a spaz as well
Knock knock whose there
It’s your good old daddy
Do you want popcorn for the movie
Knock knock whose there
Your mummy says
Your friends don’t know what we know honey, you are groovy

the muddle, WHAT AM I




i am a lady i am a man,

i am a kid, no i am a young dude

i have fun oh yeah, yeah, so much fun yeah

as i party with the others

ya see i get teased and i tease a bit

i am the coolest dude around yeah

i have fun yeah, with my bottle of COKE yeah

to try and recapture my youth, no matter how impossible it is

oh yeah i am a lady i am a man

i am a **** kid or a computer nerd

i don’t know how to fix a computer, but can use the computer for fun yeah

well, i love life, and really PARTY, with my bottle of coke yeah

i saw a south sydney supporter standing straight and tall, yeah

after their premiership win last year, they were the best team oh yeah

yeah, i am a lady i am a man

i am a helper of the poor, yeah

i have a lot of fun in me, being cool oh yeah

It’s the last day of winter, mate
Celebrate with a drink
The flowers are growing now
In time for the season of spring
The sun is shining
Ready for 3 months till summer
But spring is the season
That brings the gardens to life
Don’t forget to party mate
In your backyard with a wine and then
You talk about the flowers and trees
Oh yeah oh yeah that sounds so cool
This winter was a bit weird
Because of covid 19
It just seemed to go so quickly mate
But who gives a ****
Floriade won’t be on in
It’s usual spot
Except they will have gardens all over
The city
To bring the magic of spring
We are waiting for Halloween
For us it is spring
In America it is fall
But it is good no matter wherever it is
Cool, man it is
You get to see daffodils and roses
And many many more
As they bloom tomorrow onwards
On the last day of winter yeah
The eve of spring
Oh yeah

hi dudes

last year i had to do, my dad died and i had to share my brieving oh yeah

last year i had to do, you see my previous life cronus, had to reincarnate my dad to betty

you see i was running and walking and i lost energy

because i was really hyped up, i ain’t into fetes at schools

but i had to do that because i was trying to remember dad and grieve

you see dad was throwing down memories

and i was the belconnen santa meeting the tuggeranong santa

you see i had to say, i was the christmas man

i did a lot of youtube videos and i don’t do as much now

because i am getting tired, maybe it’s my body reforming to make sure i don’t back to the psych ward

as i said i had to do that last year because i want to take all the hype out of my brain

so i can totally relax when i am with company

i remember taking a girl to a few concerts at stage ’88 and a tent over near parliament house, ya know john farnham

and sitting near parliament house watching the carols, and i like the lighting of the christmas tree

and i wanted dad and mum to see what canberra has to offer, and

i got hyped up, as my childhood desire of me, wanting to be famous, so i went on the internet

to see what i am good at, and yes, i am good at art, art colony, yes i am good at writing hello poetry

yes i can put a show on, youtube, and i am into a lot of what youtube has to offer, on my Facebook page

you see, i know i said, i will never go on Facebook but i had to, i am famous on the computer

and last year, dads spirit was getting into my body, and most of my videos were created by dad

and dad isn’t around, he’s betty, actually what is really happening, i am having fun, but i am getting tired

from entertaining, you see i had a few good ideas from youtube, like the carols by computer screen

i will be doing that again this year, and i am bringing bing crosby back to life as him and frank sinatra

were getting their spirits into my body, to let people know what christmas shows used to be, dad helped

you see dad taught us how computers can relive the past, youtube has dads spirit all through, but in a way

the people on youtube do things that dad wouldn’t approve of, even me, but everybody is different

you see preaching discipline is wrong, because you go to the youtube page, to learn what different people

are doing, you see when i was young i was sort of the black sheep of the family, in a way, i just disappeared

like what happened in 2013, and dad told us about his cat who used to turn the radio channel to the smokey dawson show

you see he lived his childhood from radio, but we were one of the only families who had a computer back in the 80s

well, we weren’t really, i am sure many more families had computers in the 80s, but not as much as now

dad looked like an old fogie, and i was teasing him, but that doesn’t mean i hated computers, and it doesn’t mean i hated dad

because in those days, only old fogies had the best computers, and in those days, you had to have money to be famous

you had to be good also, you see last year in 2014, i was having problems with the death of my dad, i was writing all this crap

and i couldn’t get  the anger out of my body and it was hard, but i finally got it out, but dad took a while to bring me back

because i like heavy metal, and i like the idea of bringing the carols by computer screen to life, i might seem like an old fogie at the moment

but that is better than being too woosey to be a computer nerd, you see dad is helping me be able to read my poems at the poetry

slam on the 3rd wednesday of each month, you see back in the 90s, i couldn’t read poems like this, and i got teased for that, but

i ain’t living in the past, well if i did, i will live in the year 0f 2002, when i started writing stories and poems, you see writing is better

than sitting on the sideline, when i have a talented family, and i am inheriting some of that talent, but i still like being lazy though

so i sit on my couch doing my tapestry like a cool adult ya see, you see, i find bing crosby and frank sinatra are the best christmas

entertainers, and i have written a few christmas carols like my version of white christmas, i am dreaming of a white christmas well stop

cause it’s too **** hot for that, and summer weather instead of winter weather and the good old winter wonderland, i have a carol summer wonderland

on the beach we can build a sandcastle, and bury uncle robbie in the sand, and my father came out saying carn ya bludgers, give your ****** mum

a ****** hand, you see i remembered dad said, i shouldn’t use ******, but i am taking the mickey out of the aussie language

but i stuck at my guns, determined to bring my carols by computer screen to life, being hyped up, but despite last year

getting a lot of fans, i still was hyped up, like, i want to host the raiders show properly but i need to relax, and at the end of this year

i will dressing up as a bird at the belconnen arts centre doing the cha cha and doing movements to the costume makers story of the bird

i am looking forward to that, and i promise i will be the best bird there, dads spirit is there trying to make people understand that this is

something i like, because this year has been a bit slow for me, but the bird piece will see if i could do movement well, which will bring me

to broadway in my next life, and maybe it might get canberra away from the group status, because i don’t give a toss about canberra

i am still enjoying my life, i have a lot of confidence in myself to be a good actor, mind you, who cares if there might be a few hiccups this year

i still got through it, i will be continuing to do carols by computer screen, this year i am spending christmas eve, with my mum, watching

the muppet family christmas and the carols by candlelight in melbourne and we will have lucky dips, buying thins $3.00 and less

and we are going to the stage ’88 christmas carols together, bringing a picnic dinner, and sing waving candles  to and fro

you see i am determined to keep bing crosby’s spirit still on earth over the computer,