Hello

Is there anyone out there?

Is there anyone out there that feels
Is there anyone out there that feels so small

so tiny
and insignificant and lost and confused
despite the fact that they are made of stardust and tread the ground of the greats?
because even though their very existence is an unlikely miracle
they just feel so
alone

Well, I do.

*"Me too."

How do I tell you
I don't have the words to say
Please stop loving me

You come from a pack
of course you didn't choose it
It was the powers that be
They stuck ya here and said:

You're a cigarette girl.

Don't let 'em hold you too long
or else
you'll burn them
But make 'em feeeeel good
So cooool
'til you curl away in a plume of smoke
leaving them
empty,
craving,
sick.

What can you do, you cigarette girl?
At 18, you can be bought
and without a thought
be snuffed out on the pavement
Because who would put you in your rightful place?

Cigarette girl of rising cost & little value
Can you tell me how you get by?
Bringing people closer to the day they die
Turing fire into acrid clouds
Clinging to city walks and lost crowds
They need you & they hate you
You're poison, one to blame
and you're still stuck living,
grasping for the flame

But hey, cigarette girl
so broken & so small
Maybe you don't mean it
but you might **** them
all.

I don't get to make mistakes.
Nothing I do is impulsive or rash.
Cold. Calculated. Meticulous.
Never spontaneous.
My blood never runs hot
and I'm not
reckless as my age would confess.
They say I never had the mind of a child
and they're right I guess

Now my head is on my shoulders
Firmly
But I can't help but wonder
Were we
meant to be bold so we can live?
Because I'm crawlingoutof my skin
Simmering red racingthrough my veins intomychestand
I want to breathe FIRE
No more plans
No more future
And I'm-
terrified
The world starts spinning
I start to cool
All the worries all the questions all the plans...
They never did me any good anyway
So before I can think
before I can doubt
Before I lose out
on another beautiful thing my caution causes me to miss
I'll make mistakes,
...if you insist

Don't worry
There are others like you
But it's going to be hard
You have to learn to control
your mind
your thoughts
Everything that spins relentlessly and simultaneously in your brain
You have to learn to vocalize
To take what's in your head and let it out
into the world.

And they might not understand

you have to keep trying
It's going to be hard
because not everyone has what you have
It's up to you to let them in
But you can do it
There are others like you
Don't worry