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 Aug 2017 NvrMnd
Boaz Priestly
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#1
*******, i am really drunk
accidentally slammed three beers
pretending that the neck of the bottle
was your lips

#2
part of me wanted to text you
staring up into the sky
praying that the stars would swallow me
and my fingers itched to type out
so many things that i would regret
in the morning

#3
and i imagined telling you
confessions of how i felt
and i imagined that little cursor
blinking back at me like so much
apathy and words swallowed
over and again

#4
and i have kissed
my fair share of people
with lips male and female
with faces smooth and some scruff
or a full beard that i envied
but girls have the softest lips
always have

#5
i wondered what it would be like
to kiss you then
holding your body to mine
hoping you would forgive the splits
in my lip that anxiety helped me put there

#6
a good describing word for how
i felt then with three beers and good food
making its home in my belly
would be “blissed”
i was blissed out on ***** and food
and my pining for you

#7
i am sober now
woke up earlier than i would have liked
but then again i fell asleep at 10:30pm

#8
and this thing i feel
it’s like a combination of regret
and disappointment in myself
for not just telling you how i feel
and for needing liquid courage
to get myself to that plateau
of spilling my guts or backing away

#9
and i have forgotten
what my favorite drink tastes like again
in favor of the words to describe
how kissing you for the first time
would surely feel

#10
and i have never felt fireworks
when kissing someone before
even the girl i thought i was gonna marry
and i’m not so young now
and a little bit more cynical
but i wanna feel those fireworks with you
and i still haven’t texted you
and i don’t know if i will
and i don’t know if i should
and i am sorry for being like this
 Jul 2017 NvrMnd
AnxiousOcean
One thing about the rain
It's not just water nor droplets
But bullets of different emotions
A match stick that burns your soul
In a deep, vague coldness

Some found happiness from it
I once did
And some did find something
They did not want nor expect

But a thing about the rain
You will always find something
It will always give you a thing
Even if you're not aware
And when you're not aware
Let me tell you that it's the rain

A thing about the rain
It's a door that leads to places you once went
It opens widely for a rent
More than being water, it is a memory
Although you cannot tell
If it is the same place
You once longed to be
We cannot say that the door is safe
Nor is it free

Some were trapped
Some managed to escape
Some managed to smile
And I managed to fear
I fear that rain would prolong and
Would bear a fruit
But it didn't
It just plucked up a great root

How wonderful the rain could be
How it crashed to ground a resilient tree
How one could change with a single memory
And how rain triggers my anxiety
 Jul 2017 NvrMnd
Maria Etre
Dim Lit
 Jul 2017 NvrMnd
Maria Etre
I stood there
naked in front of you
exposing my mind
laying it on paper 
in the dim lit room 
stripped from
all the limitations 
that my conscience 
lays on me 
like a heavy wet blanket
silhouetting my curves
separating me
from bashfulness
and my true nature
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