So i wanna die. I want to do it now, and i dont want it to be painful. Im crying cause i didnt wanna say goodbye to you. You are the only good thing that ever happened to me. Im sitting on my bed wondering how sharped a knife has to be to penetrate my chest and take my pain away. I dont have any more pill or i would throw it all inside of me and pray for it to work. The tears are painful and im feeling the pressure on my lungs. Claiming for death. I hope that in the middle of the night, with the silence from the streets, I will be brave enough to finish it.

a descontinuidade de sentimentos é o sentimento mais contínuo que me ocorre

A companhia que como metanfetamina me vicia. A falta que como a mais dura crise de abstinência suga tudo aquilo que já tive e tudo aquilo que jamais terei.

Why does that girl come here so often with those sad eyes? She passes by and stares deep into the café, always seeking for something. She does not seem like be looking for someone, it is more like she is looking for herself reflected on the glass. I am so sorry for her, she is not gonna find anything more than some broken pieces of her old self.

I was alone in my room
All my walls were falling apart
Like I was doing something wrong
And the universe was trying to punish me

The only light was the cellphone on my face
I could also look at the stars
Pretty and dark sky
Exactly like you
Somehow
You make me feel the other me
The one I thought would never awake
A few hours and I am lost on my mind
Picturing time with you
A softly kiss
Your hands

I hold myself I hold myself I hold myself

Ok
You are not here
****
I close my legs
Hold my pillow
And go to sleep
In the end
The walls were not falling apart
I was falling for you

todos aqueles que escreveram as músicas que eu amo estão mortos. enterrados sobre grama e concreto em diferentes partes do mundo. os artistas que pintaram as telas que me alegram dentro e fora dos museus também. já não há mais fotógrafos do the post espalhados pela cidade que captariam uma foto do nosso beijo na times square. no fim, cabe a mim escrever e representar a arte dessa jornada

what is better than watching videos of your childhood to realize how much you have been growing? when i was 4, living on my old house on the countryside, dad introduced me to animals, plants, geography and all the secrets of the  space. when i was 5, i remember jumping on his feet so i would move together with him. i would cut my hair by myself and drive my mom crazy. i wanted to be everything; i would go to the space and explore the galaxy, i would go on expeditions to find new plants and photograph animals, i just felt nothing would ever stop me. and i am still glad, for the best dad in the world, inspiring me and giving me humanity. now he is so afraid, i am not his little child anymore and the world, that once was all mine and ready for my dreams, seems dark and seeking to hurt every piece of my body, soul and mind.