Covid has claimed some of my close family
and it has not finished yet
maybe if just one other person had bothered to take precautions
somewhere on this Earth
My Father would not be dying in hospital, all alone.

I need you to stay in your place
So I can drive off the cliff safe
Hold on to your seat
Say your final deceit
There's a tree heading straight for your face

I want to feel the breaking of my own skin. the resist of the blade on my upper thigh.
god, I am worthless.
the only thing that makes me feel as good as you do is the trickle of blood down my legs.
how quirky.
I can't even describe myself.
I am becoming my father. addiction will always be a top priority.

"I promise, I promise"
and to think, I would never break one.

I am everything I am trying to run away from.

No rainbow follows the hurricane,
That growls like the lions roar.
For I am the rainbow that lives,
Forever in the unfortunate storm.

I wait for a song,
The sweetest to wash my tears.
So when you say you have come
I am not burdened with another goodbye.
I brace myself as your touch,
Withdraws from the places it had once traced.
So when you say you have come.
It will be as if they never existed.

Hesitation in your eyes,
Answer to all my question.

Your burning inner conflict,
Testing my limitation.

Fell for your lies,
Like I feel for your eyes.

No arch for your return,
A fool-
Still waiting for the last time.

I savour you bit by bit
Every drop,
Making me want a little sip.
In the verge of destruction,
Foul voice of victory.
You were the best taste,
life could give me.

My teeths are rotting,
Eroding,
Chewing the shards of your delight,
Sweet and sour,
Twisting my tongue,
But it's alright.

Bleeding to stay,
A night in your arms.
Bleeding to say,
Lift me up to the dark.

Your lips ,
Your touch ,
could just slice me in two,
But your love is what gets me going,
Even in dead I still desire you.

You are choking on ego,
I am soaked up in self-love.
I can't ask for what we had,
But give me back what I lost.

In the verge of insanity,
You are weeping on my chest,
If you loved us so much,
Why did you put it to rest?