I look back at the days gone by
And I smile, with tears in my eyes
Never thought we would be apart
My heart ached when we moved away
I never stopped talking about you
Forever my brother, my cousin, my friend
Now I look forward to the day
When as soldiers
We march together
With heads held high
Proclaiming the good news
That we both have found out
How great it is to know
That we were chosen
By the most High
To awaken and go forth
Strong bold and fiercely
Does your heart leap
Like mine
Does your soul feel glad
Just knowing how greatly we have been blessed
Will we pass the test
Can we make it to the wilderness
Focus cousin
Stay focused brother
And we will my friend

Starting over is never easy, especially when you've been dropped off
in the middle of nowhere.
How do I survive?
Looking around all I see are trees and dirt.
Far away I see what appears to be sand,. cactus and alittle village on the horizon.
It's evening, darkness is will soon be approaching.
Some type of shelter is needed, it's a musssssst.
I start wacking at trees and digging up dirt, will it be enough?
Will I be able to construct this dwelling before night?
Finally!
This dirt shack will have to do.
It's pitch black.
Is this a dream or a nightmare?
I hear frightening sounds,
Groanings
Someone's trying to beat down my door.
I go out of the side door, to take a look
I see a Zombie creature, I turn to run and see a creeper trying to sneak
up behind me.
Why did I venture out?
Had to fight.
I'm tired, made it back though.
A bed sure would be nice.
It's a jungle.
What am I doing out here?
MINECRAFT!!!!!

I am a single mother
Can you feel my pain
I wear too many hats
Too much stress on my brain
Can someone take this burden of my back
I strive to make it but sometimes I lack
Society leaves me
Forgotten
Through the system I go
Making me feel inferior
Bringing my spirits low
Man cannot help me
So on my knees I fall
Through my pain and weaknesses
God will restore all
In him I find hope
For today and tomorrow
He wiped my tears
Eased my fears
And took away my sorrow

Be careful who you hook up with
There is no such thing as a one night stand
That person lingers around
Their in your thoughts
You can never forget them
Good or bad
Their there    
Whether you want them to be
Or not
May have even picked up some feelings
That aren't your own
Perhaps some habits
That are unfamiliar
This is a warning
Be very very careful
You can get up and leave
But what you laid down with
Sits down
And makes itself at home

With my hands on my hips
I looked back at the job that was just completed
All day in the field
Plowing and sowing
The suns beam was strong
There wasn't any wind
Just the hot glaring sun
My mouth was dry
Lips were parched
Back was tired
And my feet were aching
As I sighed and walked away
I was happy, pleased
And convinced
That life don't get no better than this

Don't apologize for compassion
If when you see
Someone hurting
And you feel their pain
While a tear finds it way down your cheek
Don't apologize
When you have experienced a low
And then someone you know
Goes through that same low
Then you reach out a hand
To help that person up
Don't apologize
Be strong enough
To feel what you feel
With no apology needed

Passed up many opportunities
Looking for the right thing
Found myself under the load
Trying to fight my way back up again
I stepped up on what was holding me down
One thousand steps I made
Discouragement was one step
After that
Each step got harder
Self doubt came into play
I thought I could was overshadowed
By you can't
Stop while your ahead  
The closer I got to the top
My body began to weaken
I  paused for a minute
Then continued
It seemed I had reached the top
It was hard
Because my legs were shot
What I saw amazed me
Just steps
And more steps in front of me
Believe it or not
I didn't give up
I persevered
Until I was no longer on the bottom
But rising like the sun
Hot and untouchable
Bright and overwhelming
Unstoppable

Who are you?
I'm curious to know
You read what I write
As though you care
Didn't know my thoughts
Would generate such a following
I honestly try to convey
What my heart speaks
Listen closely now
And you might just hear my heart beat

The color of my madness
Red like the dawn
I strive for perfection
Whatever the cost maybe
Criticism is my reward
Telling all who will hear
Better yourselves
And work hard at it
Forget about what everybody else is doing
Look within your soul
Pill out of you
That which is more comfortable being hidden
that's the real you
stand on it
run with it
Even if its not popular
That's when you'll make it
A true test of endurance
Will you pass
Or will you fail
That is the question

All week busy, noise, no rest
People coming and going
Life abounds
Friday comes
Depart
The weekend is here
Silence
I'm by myself
Finally!
Now what?
I didn't make any plans
Everyone's out
And I'm not tired
Silence
The weekend is over
And so it begins again

Trying to forget
Hiding from my past
Packing it down deep within
Stumbling from the weight I 'm carrying
Looking for answers
In all the wrong places
Searching for guidance
And acceptance of myself
The mirror lies
I'm not fine
I just look like it
Is that what people see
A shell of what I should be
Can't they see beyond that
And help me
I'm sinking fast
Only one finger up
Above quick sand
Help before I go under
Never to be seen again
Giving up all my chances
To correct my wrongs
And be forced to except
My unfortunate end
Last chance
Pleading
Help me if you can

Everyday I hear their cries
The homeless of the street
A people
A mom
A dad
A sister
A friend
Someone's child
Hurting
Losing their minds
Wouldn't you?
Wealth is in abundance here
This shouldn't be
Cry, cry me a river
For the lost souls
That hoard their money
And close their eyes, their ears
To those less fortunate
I am but one vessel calling out
To the masses
Do what you can
Help those you see
Lying in the street
If only just to say a prayer
Do that, for goodness sake

I go to a place
Where I can be alone
My steps are light and airy
And my body feels weightless
Joy floods my soul
My face just glistens
From the mere fact
That I'm happy
And I can't stop smiling
When I go to this place
Cloud walking
I call it
When I walk with no regards
I hear no one
I see no one
It's just me
Thinking happy thoughts
As I cloud walk

Just across the creek
I could see a glimpse of hope
As I stared at my reflection in the water
The air was fresher
The grass was greener
the flowers colors were so vivid
They appeared to dance
Just across the creek
In the air sparkled healing
You just needed to reach up
And wholeness and other good things were in the trees
Just across the creek
I pondered on the thought of going over
Although it was wider than I could jump
My feet would have to get wet
If I wanted to experience abundant health
I stepped in the water
It refreshed
When my feet touched the bank
I began to rejoice
Leaping and prancing my way through a wonderland
Of just what I needed
As I reached up and out
that which held me captive set me free
Now I'm no longer bound
No more chains holding me back
Because I ignored my carnal mind
And gave way to the supernatural
Just across the creek

I see you working hard all day
I catch glimpses of you
While I play
I'm so thankful
When you call me in to eat
And when we pray
As I lay down to sleep
Thank you Mama
For your loving compassion
Someday I'll show you
Just how much I appreciate
Your time, love, and adoration

A person free of hypocrisy or pretense
Sincere,honest
Describes my Grandmother Liz
I value her sweetness and wisdom
She's the grandmother every body needs
I salute you and applaud you for your service
As a great Grandmother to me
You are grand in ever sense of the word
Age and doctors have slowed you down
But remember this we still need you around
Our God is strong enough to pick you up
And place you on your feet again
And give you back what was stolen
When sickness came in
I pray your strength returns
And you voice be heard again

I know why you cry
The sun has stopped shinning
The moon no longer lights the night
I know why you cry
Those silent tears
When your not heard
And no one sees
I know why you cry
Those silent tears
When the pain inside
Overshadows your dreams
I know why you cry
Those silent tears
As you attempt to enjoy yourself
Among the crowd
Yet you feel alone
I know why you cry
Those silent tears
When the one thing
That your passionate about
Is overlooked
And not taken seriously
Your told to do this
Not that
What you want doesn't seem to matter
I know why you cry
Those silent tears
Just remember my friend
Be happy
Life is short
Find the joy in living
And don't let it go
Anything that tries to abort happiness
Take it out immediately
There is a reason to skip
There is a reason to smile
There is a reason to dance
There is a reason to show kindness
There is a reason to love
Find It
Your that reason

When I close my eyes
I see black grass
It taunts and waves
As if to say, why are you here
It rules the darkness
I see shadows of beings
They hide and do not come forth
What are the afraid of
Black grass
The Black grass  manipulates,
time and space
Can't be  here long
Wipe your eyes
And forget what you've seen
Go home, the grass isn't always greener
On the other side

To many times forgotten
To many times passed up
By the very ones you reached out your hands
Helping pull them up
To many times thank you never came your way
To many times frowned upon for doing what was right
And not what was popular
The ones closest to you may not ever tell
How much they appreciate you for your help
Those words may not ever come from their lips
I personally have seen and experienced
The kind of person that you are
I know what family means to you
So on  behalf of those you help
For all those you drop by to see about
I say to you
Thank you
Keep up the good work

Got into some trouble
Said some things
Offended some people
Things got bad
Thought I'd get away from it all
Went up on a mountaintop
By myself
Alone
Clear blue skies
Silence all around
Beautiful cloud formations
I can breathe
Smiling for no good reason
Sat down to reflect
Up her alone got rather crowded
Memories on my left
Voices on my right
Both saying the same thing
You can't run
Had to face facts
Some call it conscious

Fall away my friend
Enter thy den
Sleep til morning comes
I'll be back again
See you when the sun rises
We'll walk and admire
The Most High's creation
Throw stones in the stream
Pick flowers and dream
Come along friend
The night draws nigh
We must part ways
But I'll see you in the morning
When the sky has light again

I wasn't quite sure
How to approach the matter
Even though we shared the same philosophy
Or so I thought
I went all in
Speaking my mind
Saying exactly what I thought
Putting it all on the line
The look on her face
Let me know
I needed to shut up
Close my mouth
And walk away
For I had crossed a line
That I couldn't see clearly before

Verily, verily I beseech thee
Come hither to me
While the warmth
Of your person is ever before thee
Come lately
You have missed me
Be swift and you'll meet me
Verily, verily I beseech thee
Come hurriedly to me

I surrender my hands go up
Against the wall I lean
Fears, anxieties, pains and past hurts
Surface to taunt me
What must I do
Where can I go
My mind searches for the answer
People coming and going
Passing and bumping
No one sees me
No one hears me
Even though their right here with me
My mind says
Your in it alone
No one cares
So why shouldn't you risk it all
But far away stood a being I knew not
Strong and fierce was He
I heard my mother say
He would be there
When I could no longer stray
I saw his hand reach out to me
With a strong softness
He beckoned for me
Those fears that taunted me held my feet like chains
But I knew if I did not move
He would leave
And I would be forever lost
Among the multitude in solitude

As I go through this desert of pain
I want look back
I'll keep moving forward
Until this journey is over
I'm alone, fighting
Outside smile, defeat
Crying but not weak
Just touched by others deceit
Hoping love would reach out to me
Not really, I understand
People are lovers of themselves
They can care less about me
Lesson learned a long time ago
Hush, whispers I hear
Sounds like my mothers voice
So faint I can hardly hear
It'll be alright, daughter
Hold your head up
Walk on
It's sweet but bitter
The choices I must make
Staying here are leaving here
A struggle coming to the surface
Doubt and fears
Hate not love appears
Truth, come and rescue me
Set me free
Hold me near and don't let go
Feel me with the things I need most
Joy, peace, and a since of belonging
If I wait here long enough
I know it will come
Waiting, Waiting, Waiting
It's here
Came in on the wings of a song

Broken by society
Wounded by voices
Hurt by those closest to me
Frightened by the inner me
Chosen to lead
Equipped for war
Standing at a cross road
Shield in hand
Fighting off the enemy that be
And it's me

I lost my words
In a trial
A tribulation
No one could help me find them
I searched long and hard
Retracing my steps
Of places I had been
One day as I sat
No comfort I could find
I started to think of the goodness of  God
And songs of praise filled my mind
Listening from within
I found my words
When I began to sing

Way up in the tree tops
Is a place I'd like to be
Making my way up
I know The Most Highs presence
Will meet me
Way up in the tree tops
Like the squirrels I see
Up above the trials
And life that drains me
Way up in the tree tops
A place where I find peace

Brothers and a cousin
They are to each other
And to me
The two T's, O and a V
The system trapped them
Two got loose O and V
The brothers, two T's
Have yet to get free
My heart sinks
When I think of the tragedy
If I could have
I would have
Stepped in to defend
But I was powerless
Father I cry out to you
Please I ask of you
Do what I cannot do
Deliver the two T's
Keep the O and the V
And remember the V
That you preserved
To led the two T's
The O and the V
Back to you

I reached out to you in a dream
Trying to pull you out of a hole
Pulled and cried
Pulled and screamed
But to no avail
My hand wasn't strong enough
To hold onto you
Your grip loosened as well
Was it my lack of strength
Or your lack of will
I guess I'll never know
The darkness was darker than dark
I noticed as I looked down for you
Nothingness was all I could see
This was only a dream
But for for what reason did I DREAM IT
My friend
Perhaps you need to awaken
Before you really fall in

Father
I whisper
As I sit and meditate
I just want to feel you near
As I close my eyes and hush
I feel your sweet embrace
Things aren't what they should be
But I know your here
I wait
I trust
And I do not fear

It seems we are all linked together
Common threads, knit stitched
Different hues,different languages
All races created by The Most High God
One Father
One family

When my eyes close
I go to another place
Visible only to myself
I am whatever I chose to be
Flying high above the clouds
Happy weightless and content
Nobody can do me any harm
Smiling
Only good thoughts
Feeling healing way up here
In my mind there is peace
I have all I need
All my struggles are gone
In my mind
My eyes open reality sets in
I get up
And life begins

I hear the whispers of the dead
Crying because their end had come too soon
People who had no regard  took from them life
I hear the voices of the dead talking
About those who had dealt with them
In a way that did not please their maker
Killing them
Hanging them
****** them
Taking away their children
Forcing them to build up their wealth
And destroying their self worth
I hear groans of agony
Pains of what was
And what is to come
The dead knows
They hurt even still
Wishing they could help
Do something that would change things
Say something that would heal up the wounds
The dead know its all in vain
What must be
Must be
Their soul cries
For the living
Who are dead
But not yet buried
Their soul cries

Heavy load I carry
Daily weights I lift
Not to strengthen my muscles
But for endurance sake
I walk on through the storms of life
Even when it gets to hard to take
Discovering joy in the pain
And forgetting the battle
Once I've won it

Voices of the past I hear
When I close my eyes
They haunt me like a bad dream
But when I stop to think
Who I am
Who created me
Who forgave me
They stop
And I have peace

On the way home
I saw a yellow house
With a picket fence
It had a light in the window
No one's ever there
On the way home
I caught a butterfly
On my finger
On the way home
Yesterday I  saw a turtle crossing the street
On the way home
I thought about would our paths ever meet
On the way home
I lost the best friend I ever had
When her boyfriend told her he liked me better than her
On the way home
Someone yelled out their car window at me
I want say what was said
But I wasn't offended
On the way home
I grew weary from the long walk
Took a detour to get a drink
Not much longer to go now
It's getting closer
I'm on my way home

The winds blowing
Can you hear what I hear
A song
From the one
Who created the sun
Softly He whispers in the wind
A melody
Soothing your spirit within
Gently moving peaceably
Around your being
Letting you know
I Am is here
Just be still

How special Mother dearest
You are to me
I love you so
Even when I scream
No doubt about it
Your the greatest
Treasure I could find
Even though I don't act like it
I'm glad your mine

The wind blows
The Most High's Presence
Over the land
You can feel Him in the wind
The trees wave and praise
The wind whistles
Calling Him back
To pass over again

All I said was
You need to take that dress off
You know you don't have the figure for that
You must be crazy
Then I laughed
And rolled my eyes
Looking at her in  unbelief
Shaking my head
While I sipped my drink
And she became indignant
The nerve
I merely was trying to help her out
Tell me if I look like a fool
I can appreciate the truth
It cuts like a knife sometimes
She could have used it
To help her get out of that dress

How hard could life get?
I Wonder as I sit here suffering
My pain seems so great
Too much for one person to bare alone
If I desire I could surcome
To this massive weight
And give in
But something inside me
Keeps me fighting
That I might win

It ruptured
The wound inside
I dared not tell
Of the pain within
I looked fine
But I was not whole
As a little one
I was told nothing
I was not held
My cries were not attended to
My belly was not full
I hurt inside
Never told a soul
Until now
It ruptured
A sigh of relief
Now I can breathe
I can soar
I'm free
All because I released what was inside of me

Fine lines, faces, shapes and highways
People wanting something
Jets in the sky
A kite flying high
Lines are everywhere they can't be avoided
So are the trials of life
And the cries of babies
Face the test my child
Don't run away
It's learning time
Growing time
Don't quit
Just learn to be patient and wait
Good times will come
A better day you will see
If you don't faint
But take courage
And wait on Me

Feelings
Deep
Hollow
Feelings
Churning
In my soul
Conscious
Decision
To be whole
Swallowed up
By PRIDE
Defeated
My crime
Concerned
About
What
Others
Think
Of me
I'm Lost
Forever
Eternally

A beautiful winding path
Tall trees looking down below
Leaves falling as I go
Peace among the rustling sounds
Joy fills my mind
No worries
I am happy
Colors bright and vivid
Wind is crisp and pleasant
No people
No fear
Just me with my Creator near

HE ANSWERED MY TEARS

I can be free
Even though
I'm bound
And chained
To my misery
I can be free
When I see the birds
Flying high
The trees and the grass grow
I can be free
When I feel the cool breeze
And the blue sky
I can be free
If I chose to be

This life has been filled with trouble
Battles galore
Sometimes
I wanted to coward and run
But I could not
For I was the chosen one