We sat on his bed as the clock clicked closer to midnight
we had love in our eyes and each other on our lips
he asked for my approval and oh how I loved him more when he cared enough to ask
we laid down on his bed and gave ourselves to each other
we smiled and laughed because we both knew that this was right and that for once in our lives we weren't making a mistake

I could learn to love you,
but that’s not the point.
It should burst out of my ribcage
With flowers and knives
Beautiful and bleeding
Singing with joy and
The pain of bullet wounds.

If we learned anything from love,
Maybe we wouldn’t love at all.

He empowers me
Has me feeling I can conquer anything
Do I love him?
No,
But a certain kind of respect
And a clear sign of acknowledgment
Must be given
When he speaks
And when he listens.

pacify my mouth with a white-knuckled fist
and kiss my scars with a tongue void of emotion
squeeze my knees together with hands too bruised to hold
with my shaking fingers
will the knots around my neck
  squeeze me like you do
    and leave bruises like you do
the ends of your hairs tickle me
along the sides of my neck
and tell me to scream
tell me to scream
scream when you leave me alone after dark
scream when the burn of alcohol no longer stings my lips
scream when the bags under your eyes turn into luggage
    stationed next to the front door
your hands around my neck tightens like the knots never could
and the luggage looks like heaven
and somehow i find myself in the inside of your suitcase