I used to be upset I could not fall in love,
God looked tired at me and said,
“Here you go then.”
He gifted me an angel, an angel so pure she never spoke,
A glance stopped my heart,
A smile melted my heart,
A look just, filled it.
In a day I noticed her
In a week I liked her
In a year I bought her a ring
In two years I planned our wedding
In three years I gave the wrong girl her ring.

I can’t change anything,
If I could I would be asleep,
But I won’t rest til I fix what I did to you,
All I wanted was a new chance and the big man looked down at me and said yes,
He told me, “life is too short to wait,”
So I just went over to your house, I guess you could say I was very “50/50”
We never finished it but I’ll tell you, he beat it,
He got the girl and they lived happily after,
I left in the middle so I wouldn’t give you hope, I loved you so much that I couldn’t see you cry,
I’m sorry, I really am but, I love you.

The angel was gone,
She saw the real in me and flew away,
I can still see her looking at me, never did I even imagine that was the final look she would give me,
Like I didn’t imagine that was the last time you’d fight for me.

I never know where I’m supposed to go,
You say I don’t apologize for the right things so I’ll tell you what
I chose the wrong girl.

The fool in me could not fight for you, but at least I think we got one thing settled, you did love me more.

After she left I lost all my hopes at love,
I began to doubt everything I had ever done,
So without a hope left, you slid up my story.
I asked the big guy, I begged him everyday, “please just please give me one tiny chance more at love and I swear I’ll make it right.”
It took some convincing but after a year begging he gave me a chance so small I called it my muffin.

Muffin and me snuck around the city always up to no good, but I didn’t really care what we did, all I wanted was to tell the world about you.
Some things will never change, back when we were together muffin and me spent the whole night together
Now muffin, I spend the whole night up waiting for you to forgive me.

Muffin and I now don’t talk,
Maybe muffin will never forgive me
But I’m still just that boy,
The one who hurt you,
Just please remember, it takes a lot of rain for us to see the rainbow.

A bitter sweet man hated everything about you,
A lemon boy misses everything about you,
Your never changing color hair, your beautiful smile, your will to sound smart by using big words when making compelling arguments, and how could I not mention, your cat and your mom too.

I was a fool falling in love, too hurt to be trustful, only now do I believe you truly loved me,
Some things really do take time,
And even though I lost you, hopefully someday you find someone better,
Someone your father doesn’t hate,
Someone always down to see your friends,
And more importantly, someone your mother doesn’t have to defend.  

I told you I’d never lie, and I didn’t, I just lied to the big guy, I told him I’d make it right.
Guess I really ******* this up,
But it just goes to show you, that you deserve someone way better, someone who has time for you,
So I’m sorry for wasting your time,
I just loved you too much to delay the tears, I knew they would hurt much more in Summer.

I told you I’d always be there,
If there is forever then forever, is the same.
I miss hearing your voice, call me,
Whatever time that might be,
I love you muffin.

I’m falling apart

Messing with use
Inducing your friends to let go
Saying clouds were dark
Saving lives never let you save yours

You could never save me from doomsday
Or even worse save me from myself
Until you loved me that is...

Had another smoke when your name came up,
Or maybe I was drunk
Either way you haunt me everyday, **** ily.



You always taught me how to heal the pain,
But you never showed me how to deal with rain.
Only in the rain did I ever notice how it seems to stay,
Calm, quiet, and rumbly.
Just an image in the mirror you are nothing but my past, now I just pray to god you leave my dreams
Because I don’t remember the last time I slept.

It can’t get no better, it’s all you asked for
Now sit and relax I’m gonna improvise but hold on let me sip this glass-
Do it with me:
Inhale— exhale,
Sometimes that’s all you need to find the answer.
Back on track like ******* crack,
Harsh ****— how I feel?
How I feel... I feel amazing, incredible, unbeatable, like the less gifted Superman,
“You are special, gifted, you are, super.”
I wish I was rich, wish I was handsome, wish I was— the man you said I’d be.

I done ****** up with a bottle of whiskey in the dead of night but everything’s okay—
Take a breath enjoy the day, light the night and **** the sun.
I’m not gonna cry, there’s a thousand more bad times ahead of mine and trust me, everything’s ok.

Bodies breaking down on the city’s lap,
They just do but they don’t know why,
So while you fill the streets it’s important to be, the rich **** your parents want you to be
You’re thrown into this new lifestyle filled with ******* you won’t ever see
A depressing ******* style where we never smile,
We paint our faces with **** and hope to god it don’t drip,
My dreams your dreams our dreams will never exists, no.
Big Bang, big bang for the land
Turn forever, hand in hand,
Taking all in all your time,
It is ticking, falling down,
Love forever, love is free
Let’s turn forever, you and me.

You like your nights empty and fast deprived,
I can’t put my ******* phone down because it’s the only way to show you I cry,
I should probably look away goodbye but your looks have crossed me high,
Don’t taint it, I chugged a bottle to get your eyes but looked down and you had left me goodbye,
She says you are no good, to me, I love you with all my life and your love don’t love me so should I, just fly?
I look down hopeless, with no reason, quest or objective, but your heart has been redefined,
I run and fall but you are my catch so what do I do now?
May have been your crazy self in Major but I’ll tell mine was flat out,
Thought I told you I’m not good at goodbyes but I can’t just **** it all tonight,
I’m left broken hearted and cemented because your love was my elixir, so what do I do now that I am not remembered? Just go around asking:
Why did you play me? Was I just another mistake? I don’t want answers just solutions let me fix this please don’t break it.
You will never know the truth unless you ask for it, your friends don’t know me so they can’t say, what I did or didn’t, it was all just plain sweet plans,
But deep inside you had your doubts that left me point blank,
To that I say **** the world it’s you and me, babe.

I’ve got a butterfly in my pocket,
Torments in my head and a devil on my shoulder,
I sit along a burning house where I light up my smoke,
All I can think of is her.
She ran away,
Left me no notice,
As the rain ruined my sesh I could feel your hand making its way down my shirt
Took an opened eye and a smile to hereby notice the rain felt warmer than her.
I’m walking in the rain as she enjoys her new man,
I’m walking in the rain wondering who put the spiders in my applesauce,
I’m walking in the rain wondering why I introduced the two,
I’m walking in the rain,
A fool with no name
A clown with no face
A prisoner with no crimes.
As I lean against the tree, I hear a voice calling my name,
All it says is to check my phone
And all I see is a text from her asking when I’ll be home,
From giggles and s* we got to drinks and theft
From movies and talks we got to no texts and coughs,
From Uber rides and bjs we go to my new b* and her tears.
Every time she cry, please bear in mind, it’s your fault not mine.

My dear,
I don’t feel so good,
I death is on its way,
I will write you,
Act,
Like nothing is happening,
I put the world war aside for you
And even with explosions behind my back,
I feel so alone.
I could tell you how much I love you,
How much I adore you,
But I don’t think your boyfriend would much enjoy that,
Would he?
All and every attempt to be noticed
I’ll call you ‘friend’
Just as long as you call me when the party is over
Tell me you love me
Tell me you miss me
Tell me you need me,
But the morning you wake up,
When all my hopes are up, and I’m high on love
You wake up to tell me you don’t remember anything.
And all my life, I will just wish I had you closer,
Closer so close you would never ever leave me,
You only love me when you are drunk or drinking,
But even when you wake up and forget about my face, I will still love you silently, deeply and endlessly
Wishing
Wishing she was you.
Wanna go for coffee?

The streets are frozen but I’ll drive to hug you tight,
The wind blows me dry but your presence heats me fine,
I’ll walk under the showers of this wet snow, just to cuddle you up in bed and help you be alright.
And after every ride you would jump on me whispering:
“I missed you I missed you where have you been?”
You told me even if I tried I would never catch my tail but,
Even if I can’t call you mine, I’ll lay next to you on the ground just to make sure you are
Alright.
I’ll keep you company on every cold lonely night,
When you don’t feel like sleeping alone,
I don’t want nothing back, just to make sure you are smiling.
And even though your family hates me,
I wish you would just know,
That I miss you
See you,
Falling down the steps, crying with a bruised neck,
I’ll help you up, get off my *** and trace your back,
As your light gentle hair flies over my head,
I’ll hold you tight to keep you warm,
Will whisper in your ear that we are going home,
Home, alone.
I will hold you tight on the ride, so you can sleep in peace that you haven’t received,
And all that I need is to come home, oh home, with you.
Watching a movie I’ll sit away to give you space, but don’t worry I’m here just slap me hard and I’m awake, for anything and everything, you might need.
So I just thought I’d let you know,
That I miss you,
Need you,
Right here,
Because all this time I haven’t hated but loved you all the way,
You ask me when will I stop,
Well whenever you decide, to love me back.
But don’t worry take your time I’m just another guy,
I’ll call you Maeve, play it fine but deep inside we both know what I feel,
So I just thought I’d let you know you are not alone,
You got me here any time whenever you need,
Just send me a dot and I’ll rush,
I’ll save you from loneliness and make myself cry, because all I see is a little queen that needs no king,
But somehow you put everyone out to the side,
If destiny exists then let me be a servant at least I will stick around for longer, than all these guys.
So I just thought about your proposal, and yes
Oh yes
I’ll marry you,
Nothing big unless you want it,
Because besides me and me, nobody else will want to see me with you,
Don’t invite your family we will fly to Thailand, hop on my motorcycle and we, will, fly.
I’m here for little and nothing but I just thought I’d let you,
That I’m here, and nobody else, will help you as much,
So please, please please just let, me, try,
And at the end of the night, I’ll whisper in your ear, that I love you.
Just please, oh please,
Keep me tight.

Hi I’m Fidel,
I hate salad, specially in a burger,
So far I’ve been with 62 girlfriends,
None of which I regret being with or saying anything,
I love challenges but I hate being monotone,
I love being spontaneous,
I hate schedules,
I don’t know how I’ve got your attention, but I did,
If it was worth your time it means I wanted you here,
If you are reading this or maybe even hearing this;
I may seem big, but in a crowd I’m the smallest,
I may seem strong but that’s just because I am numb,
I may seem stable, calm and funny, but in reality I’m one-hundred different people at once trying to find myself, I’m always very stressed and so I let it out with corny jokes and terrible pick up lines,
I currently deal with depression, have been for the past 3 years,
Social, chronic anxiety,
I love you, but I’ll be honest enough to say I won’t be the boyfriend taking you out to dance every week,
I love dancing, didn’t always, but met a great woman that forced me into it, becoming a great passion. I love swing dancing, something about the intimacy with a complete stranger makes me so unaware of my surroundings and my own state of mind that it completely shoots me off to somewhere I can never go back,
If we ever leave the house, I’ll always be smiling, but only because I wouldn’t wish anyone thinking you did something to upset me,
Someday you might come home and see I’m full of rage and completely mad, you might even say you can’t recognize the lover you’ve been with this whole time, and honestly, there are a few days
Actually more than a few, where I can’t recognize myself neither,
I see life as a journey and love as an experience,
Every heart break is just more experience being added to me, and not more reasons to stay away from it,
I’ll buy you flowers, I don’t know if you like sunflowers, but I love them, they remind me of a simpler time when it was easier to be happy,
Every little game, girls would play at my school, some of which included picking off every petal of a sunflower, honestly one of the most satisfying things I’ve ever done,
I haven’t done it since 5th grade, and I probably never will, not because I’m too much of a “man” to do it, whatever that means, but because I can’t get myself to look back at my younger self and be proud of it.
As a young kid I always imagined my older self as a strong independent man that didn’t rely on anyone but himself, looking at myself now I rely on everyone but myself.
I like to lay in bed and listen to music with headphones on, even if no one is home, the song feels more personal and it helps me connect with the lyrics,
I’m a strong believer that we as humans enjoy any song when we are happy, but we only truly understand its meanings when we are sad.
I might get home sometimes and just fall on you, well that’s because I find home within your arms,
And no I don’t care if you are smaller than me and can’t put your arms around me, I just need to feel your body warmth there to make me feel safe.
Mostly everyday, I feel scared of leaving my bedroom, no specific reason which I can put my finger on, I just don’t enjoy it very much,
Instead of spending the day at a park,
I’d rather sit on my bed and listen to music, drinking pure black coffee while looking outside my window and seeing all the life there is,
Life truly is amazing and living, is a blessing,
I just ask that you please give in some of your sanity to walk this journey with me,
I don’t understand myself and god knows how much I wish I did,
I’m not asking for you to be my psychiatrist, nor my doctor and definitely not my mother,
I just ask for you to be there on a rainy day when I get home tired and completely drained from a few hours away from home,
I don’t ask that you cook, I ask for you to lay in bed by my side when you see me with headphones on,
You might think I’m hiding something because I’m quiet,
But deep inside my head I’m just trying to **** all the other versions of myself so I can let out my try feelings and say
“I appreciate that you are here for me, and I love you for the person you are,”
Please don’t punish me if it never comes out,
This is all new to me and in a world of pain and hunger,
I am nothing more than a crumble of bread.
I’m a broken window but that’s how the light gets in correct?
I behold every problem in this world but I’ll be by your side throughout any problem, it could be as big as our house or as small as an atom, I’ll help you with it, no matter what,
But please be aware, we are both humans, we make mistakes, I’ll attempt to be perfect, but there’s no way to escape from myself,
it is all about perspective.