I’ve drunk to the point of nausea
the deepness of my soul
And still I force myself to drink

I breathe out
I breathe in
remind myself that this
is just the dark between the stars
some spaces are wide
and some are small
but there are no stars with no space at all

I’ve always been most joyful
walking on the sand
waiting to see what pearls the waves will bring me
I’ve always been most sorrowful
wading in the water
when the waves took back their treasures
But I’ve always been proudest swimming
past the danger signs
viewing cities hidden from those staying safe on land

A simple question, really
But asked as my heart screams in agony
is only fuel to the flame
today
Might I live more by reason?
Might I be at peace
if I ordered my life more on knowledge
instead of ordering knowledge on feelings?

A frown spreads across my face
wrinkles form between my eyebrows
as I dare to stare to into the stained glass of my mind
I can’t yet make out the images in the corners
My eyes smart
my hazel irises racing back and forth between the blazing light of windows and the black of inky chasms
I’m trying to understand the beginning
to find some logical sense to the rhythm in my bones
and the patterns of these endless colored panes
My mind is greatly adorned
but I find it stiflingly cluttered