people assume that between us that i'm the one with poetic words
words that make your heart melt and flutter

but, we know other wise
that i'm the one who gets tongue tied
who searches for words
ends up saying something that sounds more like alphabet soup
than, something witty and cute
because that's what you do to me
make my head spin, my thoughts trip and fall
make my heart flutter, make me turn red
the things you say that mess with my  head
in the very best way

throwing yourself at the wind,

losing yourself in moment

the reason you bang your head on the wall
because that last movement ruined it all
the reason she left you, the reason you left him
or
the reason you haven't
the last thing you said spur of the moment
made them stop, made them listen
the thing you did last second
makes them think
the pause before going out the door
the impulse to slam it

I listen to conversations we have
well, conversation that you guys have and I  listen to
We stand in circles and chat back stage
well, actually, I'm more of a satellite
trying to  tune into the radio station
that says its an open network
but has fire walls that keep me out

none of this your fault
no matter what she has you believe
I know she's convincing
but you are so much better
you could do so much better
find a girl, one that doesn't make you feel this way
one that doesn't spend time with her ex every Sunday
this tug of war between you two
is painful to watch
we all fear you will topple in
and not be able to swim
so please cut, let go, drop the rope
that keeps you in this mess
she's a nice girl, just not to you
yes it will hurt her
but if you don't you will hurt too

In this business
it's sail of flop
it will **** if you let it
if your will isn't strong enough

there are girls who are 110
but still aren't small enough
some shoot heroine
encouraged by the adults around them
to get tiny and  frail,
to go to these extremes

Artist, going mad for inspiration
every stroke is do or die
every form in pottery needs to be perfect
meticulous planing for an 8 by 11 painting
even more for a portrait

Dancers, breaking their feet for the perfect point
****** toes from wooden toe shoes
not drinking or eating  to make weight
hours in the studio
rolled ankles strained muscles
but still moving art

Singers, not eating dairy
downing water every second
working bar till throats ache
holding sharps till they feel faint
hitting the highest note and cracking
hitting the lowest note and burning

Actors, baking under lights
quick changes, make up running
memorizing lines and monologues day and night
it's a cue line, so it has to be right!
mind racing to think of a cover  up for a missed cue
alone on stage it's only you

This business ,full of horrible truths
is not for those who would like to keep their youth
to thrive, to simply survive
you need a will as hard as nails
a strong heart
self respect
and able to so NO and keep on saying it
having a will,  a heart, respect
will get you farther than the rest

just sitting in the kitchen
talking and joking
laughing with you
joking with your dad
baking something we just came up with we called
stuff, coated with chocolaty stuff, with other stuff in side it
that was some yummy stuff
simply because we thought it'd be fun
riding bikes because I **** at doing so
so instead of teaching me
we just biked better
The stuff that we do on Saturday afternoon couldn't be better

surging through the woods
bouncing and shaking on rough terrain
almost hitting trees
but wanting to go faster
up over hills and almost flying over
hitting trees and toppling over
and just laughing and getting back on

kicking into third gear and soaring down hills
simply for the fear and thrill
of shredding through empty corn fields
thinking your safe when all you have is plastic to protect you
but I just go faster
into forth because the thrill is the best part
barley having control
but never crashing and burning