hours turn into days
and days turn into weeks -
of not talking.

i'll call you later
eventually turn into "call you when I'm free"
except that, free meant never.

the key to long distance is communication, they say
but how can we communicate when we don't even talk every day?

i refuse to give up on us
i refuse to believe we are done
but to you it seems I have become someone
less of a person and more of a fuss.

lately, I've been feeling very lonely
even when I'm surrounded by people.

lately, I've been feeling quite disconnected
to the very place I came to make connections in.

lately, I've been feeling like I don't belong
to the very place I called home.

lately, I've been feeling quite lost
despite having all the things on my checklist crossed.

lately, I've been feeling really stressed
even though I've been trying my best.

lately, I've been feeling quite incapable
of doing what I need to do, or should be doing.

and lastly, I've been feeling really sad
with the very life that gave me everything I have.

the black dog stares at me from a far
waiting for me to unveil my deepest, darkest scars,
and when I do
the black dog grew
until I was nothing but a small dot,
now the ******* dog
has taken over me life like a big grey fog
waiting for more deep & dark thoughts.