My eyes do not gaze upon who you are
they see the person you will become

I do not hear your words that time will forget
I listen to your heart

When my fingers tingle your skin as they move down your body
I do not feal the scars that life as given you
I feal the memories that you gained in that life

The aroma that comes oozing from your body
is not that of sweat but of your soul

As our lips touch and we kiss for the first time
I will forever remember the taste of strawberries
for it takes all 5 senses to know a person
My eyes to see you for who you are and who you'll become
my ears to listen to your beautiful voice
touch to feel when you are cold
my nose to smell the perfume you brought
and my taste to really appreciate the meal you worked hard to make
it takes all 5 senses to know a person

there was nothing beautiful about it
her cheeks lost the gentle blush
her hair fell out in clumps
her teeth began to yellow
nails weak and broken
lips bruised and bleeding
there was nothing beautiful about
her scarred arms
or swollen eyes
she wasn't lovely
she wasn't kind
she'd just gone
and lost her mind
there was nothing beautiful about it*
losing all her friends
being reduced to numbers on a scale
gpa or kgs
having her best friend give up on her
having her boyfriend yell at her for not taking care of herself
having her mother cry out in sorrow
having her little sister lose a role model

there was nothing beautiful in the pain she felt
there was nothing beautiful in her sadness
there was nothing beautiful
about waking up
to a dying heart

-

the blood in my veins has dried
the spark in my eyes has died
my past self cries.