Voices get out of my head
Please leave me alone.
Whatever problems I have in life
I'd rather deal with it on my own.
I don't need your counsel
Nor do I need your advice.
I'm capable of making my own decisions
I think my own thoughts will suffice.
These demons inside of me
Are taking control.
They have taken over my mind, my body
Now they want my soul.
They want me to fail
They don't want me to succeed.
I want to be left alone
Right now that's exactly what I need.
I don't need inner voices
Trying to impose their will.
I just need calm in my life
Peace be still.
Why can't these demons
Just leave me be?
What is this fascination
That they have with me?
I've tried begging and praying
For these demons to depart.
They have taken over my mind
Now they are going for my heart.
These demons have changed me
From the person I used to be.
People who used to know me
Barely recognized me.
I don't smile anymore
I keep a scowl on my face.
The person I used to be
Is gone there's barely a trace.
Please demons go away
Please allow me to prosper.
You took my kids from me
& my wife
I forever lost her.
Demons & voices you've destroyed me
If this was your plan
You've succeeded
My soul has been dammed.

I look back on my life
I reflect on my past.
I saw how I just stood still
Never quite followed any clear path.
How could people respect me
If I didn't make any positive moves?
I live in self-hate
With a bad attitude.
I lost my woman, my children
My home, my family.
My life is a dark cloud I live in misery.
I even tried to **** myself
Just the other day.
But God wouldn't let it happen
He kept me anyway.
I called my pastor
He was busy at the time.
I was having a mental meltdown
I was losing my mind.
I took a handful of pills
That only made me sick.
I can't even end my own life
Ain't that a b*tch.
If I ever succeed with suicide
Don't give Leesah the blame.
I'm just tired of this life
I'm not mentally sane.
The only thing that matters
Is my children that I love so.
They are gone from me
My life has no meaning, I think it's my time to go.
My family has turned their backs on me
I ran them all away.
I have mental issues I'm ignoring
Getting more ill everyday.
I hear voices in my head
They talk to me all the time
They torment me
These voices mess with my mind.
My inner voices are my only friends
I know that sounds quite odd.
The only thing I have to hold onto
Are these voices & God.
Nothing else is there for me
No one else is there.
I live a life of pure loneliness
I think no one else cares.
My-Ex says I'm unstable
She says I'm mentally unwell.
She tried to help me, I refused
Now I live in my own personal Hell.
I saw the pain in her eyes
She looks at me with pure disgust.
I allowed my mental illness
To betray her trust.
I can't believe how my life
Has turned for the worst.
I feel like my life is a joke
I feel like I'm cursed.
The mistakes I made in life
Were caused by my own hands.
I went through living my life
Without any clear cut plans.
I've tried talking to God
To him I constantly pray.
It seems as he's forsaken me
Because he doesn't hear me anyway.
I know that's my illness talking
Those voices wanting my faith to waiver.
I'll never let that happen
Because one day I know
I'll receive God's favor.
My mind is everywhere
Mental illness has a hold on my life.
My-Ex tried to warn me.
Why didn't I listen to my wife?
I thought losing my family
Caused my downward spiral.
But truth be told
It was happening for a while.
My mental illness has ruined me
It's left me mentally & physically depleted.
I messed up my life
Because my illness went untreated.
Is it too late to get help?
Why? My family's gone.
I lost my wife, my children
Do I want to go on?
If I never write again
If this poem is my last write.
I know I was the blame
I finally saw the light.
My pride didn't allow me to admit
I'm mentally unstable, mentally unwell.
Because I didn't listen to Leesah
I live in my own lonely private hell.

i was gasping and choking on *****
and i realised that my suicide was
not to be a pleasant one
it was to be difficult and
it was to be excruciating and
it was to be ugly and
every single second was to be a misery
i was to die feeling the same way i felt
during life

As my body turns to rust
I write ****** on this page
Watch my heart turn to stone
As I die with no hope
Iv forgotten your name
But you know what
I am
Remember my name
Forget my face
The stars chants my name
For I am a man of  darkness

Dark is the night, by the light of day

Harsh are the words, which some people say

Grievous the malaise, which we often feel

Deep are the wounds, of a hurt that won’t heal

Lasting the wrong, to whom it is done

Fleeting the moment, when praises are won

Tragic the loss, of someone we love

Empty the feeling, when they are thought of
WIZDUMBs BY JA 619