and you slip away
like grains in a hourglass
but I know you'd come back again

as you always do.

One day all my inspirations just... disappeared
I couldn't paint, I couldn't write, I couldn't feel.

I may have fell asleep for an inch of a second,
but who'd dared to rob me of my dreams?

I couldn't explain it if I tried.

One day all my words just... made no sense
I couldn't paint, I couldn't write, I couldn't feel.

These words they used to string together,
magically and easily on their own.

Now I can't paint, I can't write, I can't feel.
It hurts to remain seated on the edge of my bed,
casually typing away at my keyboard, letter by letter.

These words they do not string together,
magically and easily on their own.

It is more than you think.

I've more to say but it aches as I breathe
my heart shrinks as my chest narrows
my skin rips as my nails claws

over
and
over
and
over
again

And it hurts but the words string together suddenly.

This feels so familiar,
I know it all too well.

Why does it always have to hurt for things to make sense?
This doesn't make sense, at all.

— c.s wondering

They say I'm beautiful
And they, watch me with sparkling eyes.

Truth is--
I'm but the burnt out wick of a candle tossed away.

Oh darling,
come speak of every little thing you've bottled up
we've got all the time in the universe
is it a thousand different fears or
the masks you've plastered to your rotten flesh

we've got space on this lonely stage,
don't be afraid, the shadows are silent
come, speak

it might be too much,
words as weapons they always work
but I'd stay

till the end of time,
I'd breathe sweet-nothings on your back
nothing matters anymore,
'cause my paradise is you

you're a different shade of *******-up
but I like boys bad or good
as long as it's you

**c.s wondering

His smile glistens,
like a tricky word barely rolling off the tip of my tongue
His eye shines,
as if the many other stars in the universe cannot compare

My smile stays plastered to my face,
I'd barely say a single word
I'd barely make a single noise

Yet his beautiful eyes still shines as it always does

With both hands cupping my face,
and his face twisted into a fake pout,
a terrible attempt to tickle my soul,
"I love you," he whispers.


I guess it's true—
opposites do attract,
in an unbelievably good manner.

**c.s wondering