As she lay beside me
I could see the way her skeleton
Stretched out under her skin
Thin, and seemingly frail
I sat in wonder
What kind of life have these bones lived
She was real, and she was alive
But something told me
She was already dead inside
From the lies she told me
To the tales that unfolded me
To the love she would just throw away
She was dependent on attention
Yet, this wasn't enough to appease
The darkness as her demons teased
What is her fate?
I don't know
But hell I would love to see her emotions grow
Into something she felt so long ago
Back to the smiles that has long since passed

We are but fragile bones
Easily broken
Flesh woven over thew
Easily torn
Strong and proud
Is what we pretend to be
The touch of another
We become something other
Then flesh constructed over bones

I want to sit, and smoke a cigarette.
If only to **** my self a little inside.
To bring me closer to you.
Closer to were you are now.
Closer to those little moments that made me feel so alive.

Oh god, I've tried.
To get better to feel better.
To. Be. Better.
Oh god, I've lied.
That's where I've gotten. Better.

I want to sit and smoke a cigarette.
If only to be closer to you.
I want to leave this place.
And go somewhere far away.
Driving with the windows down.
And listen to every. *******. Sad song.
And break down.
Then eventually you will hear my cries.
My pain.
My agony.
And it will rain.
Like your middle name.
A storm will fall upon me.
And I will be washed clean.
Until you hear me from the stars above.
Untangle my lies with your love.
More than a god above.
That is what I miss most, your love.

Sometimes.
I grow tired of soul searching.
Sometimes.
I just wish I could be soul found.

I want to know why .
I want to die.
Cover me in lye.
Do not cry
I'm no longer alive
I cannot take these lies
*
So Burn my flesh
So I can fit on your mantle
A place to be remembered
Because I could never forget.

The thing about a guy like me, is I drink too much.
My friends will say it.
The doctor who hands me pills, will say it.
Even I will say it.
But.
It drowns out the voices in my head, and everything is more calm.
It isn't necessarily because I cannot stop, I have yet to find a reason to stop.