i want to kiss you and take you on walks heading nowhere and buy you cigarettes and read you poems and books and listen to music with you and make food for you and make love to you and just be yours.

Teenage wasteland is right.
What a waste of time
Dreaming for the future
Which betrayed me in the end
All that time spent crying
For all the things I didn’t have
Wasted for the problems of real life
I spent most of my teenage years wasted.

Now I know why sin tastes so sweet
As humans, we don’t know the difference
Between bad and good
We have been pushed down to nothing
Constrained of creativity
Left to fight for the golden crown

The subconscious is vicious
Somehow I thought it was okay
To let myself slowly fade away
Somehow I thought it was okay
To swallow the demons
And let them feed on me

I spent so much time worrying about body image
All of that money I saved!
Then I wasted it again
I am still drenched in sin
I survive on a chain of cigarettes

I have the privilege to think back
And remember all the fun times I had
No cares in the world
That didn’t involve myself
But now I have come to realize
Life is just a game that
No one ever wins.

You don't know
What I would do
For you

You don't understand
How I feel
When I am
Around you

You don't feel
They way I feel
And it hurts
It really hurts