You were born on Wednesday
Almost a year to the day
Since Mamma had passed away.....
Elizabeth Anne
Head full of dark brown curls
Just like your mother
My sister
It was my first time seeing a baby born
It was beautiful and a little disgusting
All at the same time
I may or may not have had to hold up
the wall for a brief moment or two :)
Just goes to show you something beautiful
did come out of this evil darkened world
A world so cruel as to take a mom
from three daughters who still needed her so
I was just eighteen and beginning my freedom
and you were just born and beginning your life

I can't stop thinking about them:

the dead squirrel,

the doves whose droppings
dot my freshly painted fence--a graffiti
in scatological code beyond my ken

the unmarked graves of Sham,
Krishna, and Chauncey--loyal pets
who never got the needle

the Zinnias up from seed who feel ambivalent
about being alive--one day drooping, the next day
appearing to thrive

and the jacuzzi,
empty now except
for her memory,

the daughter whose name
I will not say, who fell asleep in that hot tub
and did not wake up

perhaps seeds sewn so near
don't know what to make of warm water's
perverse powers

I felt a ghostly kiss on my neck..
It felt as if a warm  raindrop splashed on my neck..
For a moment I heard a beautiful dream like hum coming from everywhere..
It was the music of everything..
The grass, the dirt, the trees, the winds, the colors, and the ghost...
I was at peace with myself..
No chaos, no worries, just simply me.
Spirals of light begin to spin..
Like mini galaxies floating in the air..
Many moths with wings made of light came out of each spiral..
All different colors..
Flowers made of light grew all around me..
A great gust of wind came in and spun around me..
Flower pedals made of light spun around me.
The scent was out of this world..
It begin to make sense for a moment..
This strange place was the center of a star..
I was the star..
My imagination was making it shine..
I was feeding this star..
I was endless!

I don't really want to leave
but it seems as if I must
my life is so uncertain here
an there is little I can trust

I only really know
that this is not for me
it seems I must pursue
my loving destiny,

I have heard you always
I hope you know me too
the one who frees me baby
already I love you

without knowing you in person
I love you this I know
I only need to find you
to let this flower grow.


Ma Cherie ©2017