I wish that I'd been there for you
Through our lost and lonely years
To care for you to love you
To softly dry your tears

But that was not what happened
I pushed you out of my way
As I burned all my bridges
And let pain take full sway

I ignored the silent question
There was nothing I could say
Who would want to understand
The high price I chose to pay

I couldn't look you in the face
See hurt staring from your eyes
I turned around and ran away
I guess you were not surprised

Hell bent on self destruction
I walked my path all alone
I surrendered to my demons
I knew every hope had gone

What had I left to live for
In a world I could not bear
When I begged aloud to die
I believed that no one cared

And yet you did not desert me
You came and held out your hand
Lead me out into the light
That was not what I had planned

You loved me back to happiness
Taught me what it is to live
To keep heaven in your heart
How much we can forgive

If it takes a thousand lifetimes
I could never make amends
But know I won't stop trying
I will love you till the end

The song of the rising sun
Welcoming the new day
Hopeful anticipation
In notes of pink and grey

The song of the whirling wind
Sometimes heady and wild
Sometimes whispering its tune
With the sweet voice of a child

The song of the soaring sky
Reaching towards the stars
A silver tinted symphony
Played on a thousand guitars

The song of the restless sea
A rhapsody in motion
Waves swirling in rhythm
Stillness but a notion

The song of the joyful earth
Greeting each new season
With a simple melody
Of perfect rhyme and reason

The song of my waiting heart
Not beating quite in time
No harmony in my soul
Until the day you are mine

I've been bent I've been broken
I've been shaken to the core
I have suffered torment
Until I could take no more

I have screamed out in anger
How could life be so unfair
When I needed comfort
I could find no one who cared

I have cried many bitter tears
Regretted mistakes I made
All the hurt and misery
What a heavy price I paid

I have felt empty inside me
Despairing and chilled to the bone
Cut off from humanity
Surrounded but all alone

I have lain down in darkness
Seeking an end to my pain
Only to wake in horror
When morning came round again

I have crossed the edge of reason
Where only madness waits
On an path of self destruction
That lead slowly to hell's gates

I have walked through the fire
Let the flames consume my strife
I have risen from the ashes
And stepped into a new life

Who is that girl in the mirror
The one in the bright red dress
Her mouth says hi I'm feeling fine
Her eyes say my life is a mess

Is it her lipstick that's crooked
Or is it the way that she thinks
There's a world of hurt in her heart
And maybe that's why she drinks

Quickly she picks up her glass
Here's to a night on the town
She puts on her best party smile
Finds where she put her bag down

She will go out for the evening
Have fun with friends for a while
Hiding her pain a bottle
Moping just isn't her style

Maybe some guy will please her
Chase dark thoughts from her head
And she will wake up tomorrow
With some stranger there in her bed

Or maybe she'll fall home alone
Pour herself back through the door
Not hear the voice calling mummy
As she lies in a heap on the floor

She will cry tears in the morning
A sea of self pity and shame
Life has spun out of control
And in no way is SHE to blame

She walks a fine line at the office
A finer one with the school
How many times can she do it
How long can she break every rule

Why did her partner leave her
When they'd been together so long
How could that be her fault
When she had done nothing wrong

She has lost friends and lovers
Each parting cuts like a knife
And now her mother is dying
She simply can't deal with her life

How did it get this crazy
Why can't she just get things right
Why is she haunted by demons
That keep her awake through the night

She still looks for an answer
To a prayer she cannot yet say
She walks so scared and alone
Pushing hope out of her way

She has to find her surrender
To be at that all time low
Where her life cannot be managed
And she truly admits this is so

I pray she holds out her hand
Before chaos breaks her apart
I pray she finds her solution
And true peace reigns in her heart

She’s more fun when she is drunk
At least…until she’s not
Because she’s puking in the toilet
And regretting her last shot

She’s more confident when she’s drunk
Gorgeous and ready to score
Until she looks in a mirror
And feels even uglier than before

She likes herself more when she is drunk
Until that feeling goes away
When she is so far beyond gone
That her self-hatred comes out to play

She’s happier when she’s drunk
All her issues leave her brain
But they all come crashing back at once
And cause her so much pain

She likes the world more when drunk
It’s filled with so much good
Until one little thing sets her off
And she hates it all more than she should

She likes life more when she’s drunk
Her mind for once feels still
Terrified of losing that feeling
She soon wants to end things with a pill

But she can stop any time she wants
Or so she’d have you believe
Because alcohol makes her seem so happy
That is, until all her friends leave