I almost said I meant it.
I meant it. I do like you.
But you
you are a moonlight night hidden behind clouds. Barely seen for the beauty. Always seen for the hiding.
And I
I am a song sung while crying at midnight.
And man. I swear to god.
The moon is shining bright where I can see it.
And it doesn't know but I think its beautiful. Oh its beautiful.
"Come on skinny love." My voice
shakes.

Tonight my already fragile soul took yet
another
hit. And I am lonely.
Its a disease. Spreading through my heart to my shaking fingers and my watering eyes.
I want to scream. To run. To curse. I want to rid myself of this disease. I want to chop myself up, melt myself until I am a puddle of goop on the floor.
I want to recreate myself so that I can be someone that you want. That anyone wants.
I am so tired of being torn down and told to rise. I want to run away.
I want to be loved.

I miss my mom.
The one I never had.

You know how it hits you? The weight just slams into you and wonder how you stood so tall for so long.

Lately I have felt so ugly. Like repulsively ugly. Like to the point where I cry thinking about it and deciding what to wear is a losing battle every day.

I like to sleep with a couple of books on my bed. They keep me company.

I want to let my friend know how hot this fire is getting inside me. I want to know that when I sleep I sometimes think of him.  I want to kiss him and i want to say how I feel like Tiffany does in silver linings playbook.

I am not okay after all. I am heartbreak and loneliness and I will succeed I have to succeed what if I don't succeed

Am I too broken? Lately this glass has been spilled all over the floor and it just keeps pouring and cutting anyone that cares enough to get close.

See I have a problem. I am so scared of being liked of being loved. I joke about the ******* I don't but ******* are safe. They will never truly love me as deeply as I love them they will break my heart all the time and I will cry but I know that we all get what's coming to us.

I want to believe I deserve something good but its so much easier said than done

Love, well love is like a good cup of coffee

We all want to drink it without getting burnt