I see you in my dreams
You're magnetic
I'm drawn to you and we fit like a puzzle
But only in my dreams
In reality, I'm not sure you know my name
I see stars when we kiss
And can't control my hands
But only in my dreams
In reality, we've hardly spoken
I could hold you forever
I could watch the moon in your eyes until God calls us to him
But only in  my dreams
In reality, you don't think of me at all
I'm in love with you
But only in my dreams

It's a terrible reality when you realize
What a terrible person you are.

I am right-handed

That means that my left side

Is covered in scars

You cause me pain
You make me worry

But I will never leave you

You hurt my heart
You **** my spirit

But I will never leave you

Think of this next time
You think of making me
Upset

Many people fear their past
They look back terrified
Ashamed
Worried it will repeat itself

I'm not sure I am
My past is riddled with darkness
It is millions of mistakes sewn into billions of memories
I have seen darkness
But I will not become
Darkness

I have laid down on cold bathroom tiles
Grasping for air and drowning in pain
I have bled myself out for a love I will never have
I have seen death
I have stopped death
I have watched friends fall into puddles of misery
Before my very eyes
I have woken in the beds of strangers
And taken my leave without a trace
I have been beaten to a pulp by a lovely friend
Who still insists she can't remember
I stayed home when they go out
Because I can't bare to see sunlight

But I will not become darkness
My past has no bearing on my future
Because I have also seen light
And it is good
Illuminating
But mostly just good

Being happy is a choice
I can wallow in self pity for the rest of my life
Or I can wake up excited to be alive and to be breathing
I want to see beauty in cracks on the sidewalk
I want to be content, ecstatic, elated
Every ******* day
I am going to be happy
I will not be held back
I will breathe in sunshine and exhale rain clouds
Happiness is far more beautiful than this sadness
I will not feel sorry for my past
I am obligated to make the best of it
I will be happy
Because happiness is a choice