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Nicholas M Dao Mar 2021
Like a fresh pie to the face
Or an annoyingly jovial companion,
You were there.

Hand held out my way,
Warmth tracing along the edge of your smile,
I was there.

Breaking for lunch at work,
Or enjoying a nightly drink with everyone,
We were there.

but........

then.....

The unknown passing,
All alone in that early morn',
Looking around,
you were not there.

It was then that we,
That I knew.
It was always you.
But you would never know.

I never told you.
Now I never will.
Nicholas M Dao Dec 2019
A distant 'something' of fleeting promise,
Ephemeral as the fading dream
And yet, as certain in its
Tentative inevitability, does my
Life forge its way evermore.
To know I am heading to a place,
But not the truth of my destination,
To be a part of the living
Is also to be made
Into an unwitting traveler, forever grasping
Around in the hazy, dark light of time,
Passing by, adrift,
Ultimately juxtaposed into 'choices'
I am 'forced' to make
To live
To learn
To change
To just...be.
Into the crushing unknown do we
All find ourselves trudging alongside.
And for all that mystery,
All that wonder,
Every doubt,
Or question upon question,
I've found my compass; nothing will deter me now.
166 · Dec 2019
"Always Now, Nowhere Else"
Nicholas M Dao Dec 2019
Place to place, person to person
Each and every moment.
A second, a minute
An hour, always more.
The continuous stream of instances,
From start to end, however droll,
However wondrous, NEVER THE SAME.
A life is but an amalgam of the countless 'present'
An ever-reaching macro experience.
Moments will come that shake one's very core,
A 'hurt' so great, it may break you down.
Other times will heal the wounds,
Accentuate every breath,
Burst forth unto many, a joyous light,
A giddy warmth, seeping into the surrounding
Fractal filaments of space;
A kaleidoscopic haze, spontaneously shifted,
Made anew, in crystal clear focus.
For all the highs and lows, living holds meaning.
Each breath, each glance
Every step or touch
There is worth to be found.
Another moment felt, another memory kept.
Born we are without option,
Better now to 'choose' to find purpose
Nicholas M Dao Dec 2019
Day to Night,
Dawn to Dusk
Nearly every waking moment.
A cacophony of sensation
Floods my fogged world view.
Creaks and aches,
Moans and groans
An encompassing pain shoots throughout
As compliment to the subtly pervasive 'empty',
Always looming, watching and waiting,
Seemingly endless.
And yet, it is unmoving, restrained, held at bay.
Some invisible force, waxing and waning
Both bound, affixed
Inseparable opposition,
Two sides of the same coin.
A singular bridge of light
Gray, hollow, yet steadfast.
A calm, beating hum emanates
Filling the void
It washes past me
Leaving only the bitter reality,
What I've ALWAYS needed.
The pain of the fall
The will to stand

— The End —